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!Fly-gonz Nov 7, 2012

Well...

I'm in great need of some. xd

Here's a recent example:

The Real Romney Concession Speech[Mitt Romney in his Massachusetts home, hysteric, talking to a large empty room.]

Thank you again. My friends, supporters, my wife Ann, and running mate Paul Ryan.

This is my second concession speech.

My first concession speech was to save face. There were a great deal of things that I wanted to say, but I could not under those circumstances. However, as my career comes to a close, I believe this may be my only opportunity to warmly congratulate President Obama on his successful assassination.

[Mitt Romney pretends to quiet the non-existent crowd.]

What I am about to say may be hard to understand, but it's the truth of this campaign. Thi

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Devious Comments

~TheBlackBullets Nov 7, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

Let it Abomasnow pt 1We were supposed to be at the client's house yesterday, but no, Tommy just had to get the stomach flu and puked all over the RV. So, we spent all of yesterday trying to get the vomit smell out of the RV. This was a personal mission for me, and I really didn't want to be late. So we settled down a hotel and set our alarms for a time a bit too early to get up.

At 5 a.m. the alarm went off. I ain't used to an alarm waking me up. I nearly jumped out of my skin. "Shut up," I mumbled and blindly pressed buttons, anything to make it turn off. Instead, I knocked it off of the stand and it kept buzzing. I sat up and put my glasses on my face. I turne

Long Way Down pt 1 It was one of the biggest buildings in the world. 180 floors, and we were going to have to get to the top. It all started a month ago when we got an e-mail from a Nurse Joy from this city. Apparently, her Audino went missing and wanted to employ us to go find it. We were only going to get one grand for the gig, and since that really can't feed us, we half-assed the search. After two weeks, we gave up and were about to head back home when we got a bunch more letters from other Nurse Joys from around the city, complaining about the same thing. Suddenly, one grand per Audino didn't seem like such a bad idea. Our informant (of whom we never real

The Black Bullets Ch.1 It feels weird being on top of the world one day, in jail the next, then giving up hope and becoming a hobo. I guess I've seen it coming for a long time, but after years of narrow escapes with the police I thought I'd become invincible. I'd been tempted to just suck it up, go back home and get married, but upon arriving realized why I left in the first place. At least they left me with enough money to travel as far as I possibly could from them.

I tried to get a job, any job, but no one would trust a thief. So then I was left with two choices:

Return to a world of crime

Or

Beg on the streets.

Going to jail the first time around was st

~hippo-rim-job Nov 7, 2012 Hobbyist Artist

TRUE STORYOnce upon a time, in a land covered with weasels and cheese, there lived a bee-keeper named Sven. Sven owned more Rubik's Cubes than any other member of his family. So naturally, people were envious. Sven's best friend was Chicken Man, who was neither chicken or man. But he did have his SCUBA diving license.

When he wasn't busy keeping bees, Sven liked to hang out with Chicken Man his family's den, the room where they sometimes gathered to throw avocados at a picture of Margaret Thatcher.

As you probably suspected, Sven's house was made entirely of taco shells. Fortunately it rarely rained where he lived. But this did make it more difficult

~saevusWinds Nov 7, 2012 Student General Artist

Sad Blue EyesWhen I was little, my mom used to carry me everywhere. She would cradle my pudgy pale body and rock me back and forth, watching me as I cuddled close to her warm body. My mom's eyes were big and blue, but were always terribly sad when they saw me. On the days when her eyes would become so glossy raindrops fell off her face, my mom would roll up my dress sleeve to reveal a delicate bangle resting around my wrist. "Your number suits you…sweet like berries…" she would coo in my ear, "Palmer and Rodney don't have numbers as sweet as yours." Her voice would weaken and shake whenever I asked what my number was.

I didn't understand why it

SpinelessIf Leroy Pangle was a book, he'd be that crumpled, beat up paper-back in the forgotten corner of the classroom shelf. It wasn't to say no one knew that corner of the shelf existed; everyone in the classroom always knew about that one book laying alone there. It was for that reason, however, that whenever the teacher told them of the next assignment, the students' in one in a panicked madness would dash to the shelf, shoving people out of the way, as if the books were the last food reserves on Earth, and the last reserve was full of garlic. Of course, it was Leroy Pangle who always got there last and sure enough that book was waiting for him.

and I also have some poetry and a lot of other stories. I hope my work is to your liking.

~TheRockMonster Nov 7, 2012 Student General Artist

SundaysThe weather was rainy again.

It was also a Sunday. I always hated Sundays. There was never anything to do, the news was always horrible and everyone was just so... melancholic. It was almost pitiful. I could never understand why people chose to act this way just because of what day of the week it was, perhaps that's why I started going to Julia's coffee shop every Sunday. Just to people watch, you know? Julia's was a nice place by normal standards. It was on a quieter street, the place was clean for the most part (I never even dared to step into the washrooms and by my guess, neither have the employees) and the food was usually hot. Not

Wanderer's LamentI often been asked
Have I ever seen the world
To which, without fail, I always reply
I have seen many things
I have seen many things

I have seen all the towns
And found nothing new
I have seen stars in the sky
As they withered and died
I have seen many things

I have witnessed the fall
Of forests so great
And watched oceans take over
The rivers and lakes
I have seen many things

I have sat upon hilltops
And watched the world sleep
I have climbed upon mountains
To see life wither in defeat

Oh, I have seen so many things
But I have never seen the world

StandingAs I spent my days in sun
Walking through the trees
I spotted a dear friend of mine
Stuck in softest breeze

Floating through the draft
He thought about his fate
Time rushed past in daylights grasp
But all he did was wait

In all my years I cannot say
I've seen more patient acts
Stuck in place against the world
Dreading modern fact

Cities start to rise and fall
Human kind did grow
But still my dear old friend stayed
With no other place to go

I left him standing
Then saw him fall
No fight against human right
No tree ever stood so tall

Wolves and Woods She sat quietly beside the trail into the forest upon a slowly rotting stump. Showing not a drip of emotion upon her worn face, she continued to peer into the woods, as if she were waiting for a figure to manifest in the mixture of shadow and vegetation. Nothing appeared, yet she continued to wait, silently thumbing the edge of the blade she held. Wind threw her hair into chaos and bit angrily at her skin, begging her to leave. She remained still. Her cape caressed her body in the cold and vowed to keep her warm, its vibrant red the only source of colour in the dreary evening. Nature seemed to be warning her of what was to come, with

I hope any of this is to your liking

~PokeSis Nov 7, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

I've written a few stories/fanfics in the last 5 years or so, I'd be happy to see what you've got to offer, and perhaps you can do the same for me.

!Fly-gonz Nov 7, 2012

mmm, i'll look around your gallery.

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