I once thought that if I ever lost control of my mind in a big way then this would cause me to end it all. Then time went by and I saw many examples of really ill people going into work. One person was paralyzed from the neck down but she had a computer job. Another one was a woman who talked out loud non-stop, cussing and swearing, fuck this fuck that, as she went into work, dressed very professionally. After seeing that, I started thinking that I would work too even if the worst happened.
The only time I would ever commit suicide is if I am mortally wounded and I give the order to leave me behind and buy my buddies a few minutes of escape. I rig myself and booby trap my body if I am moved with as many explosives as I possible can and hold the trigger. I wait for my enemies, zombies, or monster to come and get me and then smile as I say a cheesy one liner before I blow them and me to kingdom come.
Been there, tried that. Apparently, for me, it took my dad dieing when I was 17, feeling like I didn't have time to grieve because I was in the middle of my senior year of high school, and like I couldn't because I wanted to be strong for my family, then going to college and working my butt off, becoming severely depressed because of my grief and college stress, and then going through several relationships that I cared deeply about and didn't work out. Among other things.
However, I'm so very glad that my attempt failed, and I'm thankful for the drugs and therapy I went through to get back to thinking logically and wanting to live.
I've known people that have taken their lives. I suffer from depression now and then. I do want to hide sometimes but I wouldn't take my own life. I do believe in euthanasia however. Being stuck in a vegetated state for the rest of your life is worse than death.
I would consider euthanasia if I want to commit suicide. What would make me commit suicide, would probably be if I have a terminal disease with no chance of recovery, or got myself into a very high debt (very unlikely, since I am very debt-averse.) I don't see myself wanting to be a burden to my loved ones... and if I know my disease will kill me within a year, I wouldn't mind using euthanasia to die.
Of course, that'd be in secrecy because if I discuss this with my family, they'll kill me before I could even kill myself.
Something, unfortunately cliche. :/ I've thought of suicide so many times, and I was going to do it on the weekend of my birthday once, but obviously that didn't happen. I'm just glad I pulled away that sort of thinking.
Well since I am a overly optimistic chick and I pretty much lived through quite some shit in my life I think committing suicide isn't something I'd consider soon. But I can imagine that, being let down by the one I love, being kicked off of my education AND losing a big amount of my friends COULD drive me into taping my windows shut and burning all my candles (and I have a LOT of candles XD)
that or losing my right arm...sounds crazy? well to me it's a simple equation. Drawing=my life No arm=no drawing No drawing=nothing to live for
but even in THAT case I would be stubborn enough to learn to draw with left (I hope)
I tried last time because nothing in life was going well and everything was going wrong. It seemed like the only solution to solve all of my problems at once. Of course, it was incredibly stupid to try.
Your still a youngster maturity wise. Give it two or three years and life's little problems seem so much more... Insignificant! I think ever teen feels like the world is ending when something goes wrong, You grow out of that shit.
It'll only be if I got too much rejection and after the first, it would have the domino affect right after with everything else. Work, school, family, friends, crush, society, etc. I think that is why most people commit the suicide because they feel cornered and unaccepted. But the rejection would be like serve rejection to where I lose things that I can't get back in a way that it'll be the same. Or I just don't get them back at all.
To be honest, I actually considered it a few times in these past few months. Nothing too drastic, but I had the curiousity about what I could OD on. (Like if I could OD on energy drinks). However just the fact my mother is around and I know how much she loves me, that prevented me from doing anything. But it was all because this year was just a bitch to me. Anything that could go wrong, did.
Maybe if I lost all my friends and family, lost everything I've worked for, had terminal cancer, fallen blinded and became a quadriplegic... then maybe I'd think about it... but other than that, I really don't think I would. (excluding the fact not only don't I think I would, the paralysis would probably make it so I simply couldn't... which is even sadder.)
Nothing short of my whole family, all my friends and everyone I ever knew dying while at the same time ending up on the street and losing an arm and a leg after contracting leprosy and losing my sight to cataracts. Hmm, and even then maybe it will be hard.
Now what would cause me to commit suicide if I were still a teenager? eh, not much more than getting dumped from a 2 week old relationship.