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December 13, 2012
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‘Build a Death Star’ petition clears threshold for Obama response

:iconebolabearvomit:
EbolaBearVomit Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2012
I think it would be awesome if the White House addressed the Death Star petition before the cowards and traitors who want to leave the Union.

A Death Star would eliminate unemployment in the United States.


By Olivier Knox

It is a period of civil war. Rebel pranksters, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the forces of Taking White House Petitions Too Seriously. Specifically: They have secured the 25,000 signatures necessary to get a formal response from the White House to their call for America to build a DEATH STAR.

"Those who sign here petition the United States government to secure funding and resources, and begin construction on a Death Star by 2016," the petition reads.

"By focusing our defense resources into a space-superiority platform and weapon system such as a Death Star, the government can spur job creation in the fields of construction, engineering, space exploration, and more, and strengthen our national defense."

Some estimates put the cost of doing so at around $852 quadrillion, roughly 13,000 times the gross domestic product of the entire Earth—even when factoring in the savings of not putting any guardrails around any of the facility's seemingly endless number of bridges, spans, shafts and pits. And history cautions against being too proud of the technological terror thus constructed, because the ability to destroy a planet, or even a whole system, is insignificant next to the power of the Force.

Crossing the 25,000-signature threshold—right before the Dec. 14 deadline—doesn't actually guarantee a response. The White House has made clear that it will pick and choose which petitions will get an answer. We may have to rely on the Bothans.


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Devious Comments

:iconcenaris:
Cenaris Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
That was awesome
The Administration does not support blowing up planets.
Other planets clearly have oil.
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:iconebolabearvomit:
EbolaBearVomit Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
hahahahaha!

Yeah probably:P
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:iconmiletich2:
miletich2 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow. Good one, man. I bet that would bend the unstable government to the president's will. :sarcasticclap:
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:iconebolabearvomit:
EbolaBearVomit Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
Indeed.
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:iconmgonzales041090:
mgonzales041090 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
[link]

The White House responds to it. XD
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:iconebolabearvomit:
EbolaBearVomit Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
I know ^_^
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:iconjeysie:
Jeysie Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
That is quite possibly the most awesome thing ever.
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:iconmgonzales041090:
mgonzales041090 Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I died reading it. Good stuff.
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:iconjeysie:
Jeysie Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I liked the "Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?"
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:iconmgonzales041090:
mgonzales041090 Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
If TSA would update their terror watch-list, no radical rebel Jedi extremists would be able to board an X-Wing! Problem solved.
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