Murder Stigma - alienated from society?
A man aged +/- 25 who killed his ex-girlfriend in a passionate argument that went out of control, served his time but during his time he fell in love with a female warden.
They start dating and become a couple – even after his release from prison, though the warden has a daughter.
Her mother and her best friend do not agree and “force” the woman to break up with him and giving up on her love, trying to forget him because, HE IS A MURDERER. The woman tries to forget him, but stays stuck between emotions.
Eventually her daughter gets to know the fact he was a convict and killed his ex-girlfriend, yet the girl(Innocence of a child?) says that her mother should pursue her romance instead of living a sad and depressing life without him.
After a few months she goes back to him, and she’s once again happy – though loses her best friend in the process cause she was opposed to the relation due to the “murder-stigma” he carries with him.
Her mother eventually agree with her daughter and gives them her blessing.
What’s your though on this “murder stigma” that runs deep in our society?
Could you give someone like that a second chance, do they deserve a second chance?
Are they allowed to have a new romance after accidentally killing their previous one?
I’m well aware I looked at it from a romantic point of view – but what about reintegration into society? Should they forever carry the brand? The Stigma?
*Note : this should not be a discussion about death penalty or religious justice – it’s purely meant to discuss the possibilities/difficulties of social reintegration.
They start dating and become a couple – even after his release from prison, though the warden has a daughter.
Her mother and her best friend do not agree and “force” the woman to break up with him and giving up on her love, trying to forget him because, HE IS A MURDERER. The woman tries to forget him, but stays stuck between emotions.
Eventually her daughter gets to know the fact he was a convict and killed his ex-girlfriend, yet the girl(Innocence of a child?) says that her mother should pursue her romance instead of living a sad and depressing life without him.
After a few months she goes back to him, and she’s once again happy – though loses her best friend in the process cause she was opposed to the relation due to the “murder-stigma” he carries with him.
Her mother eventually agree with her daughter and gives them her blessing.
What’s your though on this “murder stigma” that runs deep in our society?Could you give someone like that a second chance, do they deserve a second chance?Are they allowed to have a new romance after accidentally killing their previous one?I’m well aware I looked at it from a romantic point of view – but what about reintegration into society? Should they forever carry the brand? The Stigma?*Note : this should not be a discussion about death penalty or religious justice – it’s purely meant to discuss the possibilities/difficulties of social reintegration.
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She is selfish egoistical moron for:
-Falling in love with an inmate (relationships between staff and inmates are forbidden)
-Putting not only herself but also her daughter near an ex-killer who lacks self control
-Falling in love with an inmate (relationships between staff and inmates are forbidden)
-Putting not only herself but also her daughter near an ex-killer who lacks self control
Love is bananas.
Gwen Stefani, is that you 
Well, it's not smart to be in a relationship with a murderer, because the sort of person who commits one murder is likely to do it again, on purpose or by accident. He/she probably has mental issues of some kind.
That said, every case is different, and I have no problem with the basic concept of someone falling in love with a murderer.
#crimeandpunishment
That said, every case is different, and I have no problem with the basic concept of someone falling in love with a murderer.
#crimeandpunishment
You have a valid point, and I'm glad you'd not just call it black/white.
There is indeed a very large grey area depending on circumstances, mental health and much more.
There is indeed a very large grey area depending on circumstances, mental health and much more.
Well, love is love. If she loves him, it's fine. If she loves him and she realizes that he was
playing her, scars will heal.
playing her, scars will heal.
I agree, but is it right for society to judge her for being in love?
Depends on what you mean by society. On this forum, or in real life?
IN REAL LIFE: No, it is not okay for them to judge her at all. It is her choice, and hers only. If they can't get over that fact, then they must forgive their loved ones easily, showing that they are not very good friends/relations/whatever.
ON THIS FORUM: Well, the word "judge" is kind of a harsh word. Think of it as an opinion. You posted this forum, and all forums get haters. It's natural, trust me.
IN REAL LIFE: No, it is not okay for them to judge her at all. It is her choice, and hers only. If they can't get over that fact, then they must forgive their loved ones easily, showing that they are not very good friends/relations/whatever.
ON THIS FORUM: Well, the word "judge" is kind of a harsh word. Think of it as an opinion. You posted this forum, and all forums get haters. It's natural, trust me.
Of course I mean real life.
I'm well aware of the "haters" - I'm a big forumer(17k+ posts).
I like a discussion, just not when it's too narrow-minded.
I'm well aware of the "haters" - I'm a big forumer(17k+ posts).
I like a discussion, just not when it's too narrow-minded.
IN REAL LIFE: The answers no I guess? No one should judge people on who they like.
Can't the warden find anyone on the outside instead? She must be very ugly if she goes with one of the lags. Prisoner/guard relationships should be banned and any officer caught should be sacked on the spot.
They did started dating inside as well as stayed together once he got free.
Alas under pressure of society she had to break up.
I believe one should be a little bit more professional when at work
Alas under pressure of society she had to break up.
I believe one should be a little bit more professional when at work
Depends how they killed the person. One blow, one shot or one stab then that's a tragedy. But they could have called it manslaughter. If they stabbed, shot or hit the person loads of times then you can NEVER TRUST THEM ever again as they lose control.
Exactly, they didn't specify the way the deed was done at all, so there's a lot left to speculation.
I think it is stupid for her to date someone that has committed murder if he can't controlling himself and keep himself from killing his lover the first round. What is to stop him from doing a second round, by the way has he said he was being foolish idiot for killing his first lover ? I will meant this story is good for fiction but bad for reality.
He did feel very bad for what he has done and accepted his punishment,
He does realize he'll never be able to truly atone for what he's done.
All by all, I believe if the woman truly loves him and knows everything about him.. it's really her choice.
He does realize he'll never be able to truly atone for what he's done.
All by all, I believe if the woman truly loves him and knows everything about him.. it's really her choice.
See, here's the problem-
You have a dog that bites, you can't trust it. Same with a person. If someone can lose control and kill someone ONCE, they can do it again.
Since killing people isn't acceptable in our society at this time, we are supposed to have more self control than that, it's going to put them permanently outside of societal norms.
Does that mean they are bad people? Not necessarily. But it DOES mean they are by default more dangerous than your average person.
The REASON someone has killed someone also makes a HUGE difference. Flying into a rage is way different than killing someone who is actively trying to kill you. In general, self defense is acceptable.
You have a dog that bites, you can't trust it. Same with a person. If someone can lose control and kill someone ONCE, they can do it again.
Since killing people isn't acceptable in our society at this time, we are supposed to have more self control than that, it's going to put them permanently outside of societal norms.
Does that mean they are bad people? Not necessarily. But it DOES mean they are by default more dangerous than your average person.
The REASON someone has killed someone also makes a HUGE difference. Flying into a rage is way different than killing someone who is actively trying to kill you. In general, self defense is acceptable.
Very true.
I don't think I'd be fully capable of trusting him/her.
I don't think I'd be fully capable of trusting him/her.
That's nice and all if someone wants to fuck/date/marry someone who murdered their last lover, but I sure as hell wouldn't. It would be one thing if you said he murdered an abusive spouse or otherwise in self-defense, but it takes a special kind of person to be able to kill, I don't care how "passionate" the argument is, and I want nothing to do with someone who would ever resort so casually to murder, I mean just what the fuck. I'm kind of surprised this is a discussion. Of course they're allowed to date again and most of them do, but the people who write love letters to murderers are a zany bunch all on their own.
Oh god. People writing love letters to "mass" murderers is simply insane.
But you're right though - I wouldn't date someone like that, but I wouldn't stop other from doing so.
But you're right though - I wouldn't date someone like that, but I wouldn't stop other from doing so.
For me I also consider my family. Even if I had a crush on a murderer, my mother would die if I brought him home and it would be something we would fight over for the rest of her days. If this was something like my mother freaking out over him being black or not being a doctor, her opinion would be irrelevant. But I can't put my mother through such genuine stress as dating a murderer, one who murders his partner no less.
If you put it like that, it's rather nice of you.
To place the happiness of others before your own.
But what if by doing so you truly destroy your own happiness and causes you to be depressed - missing him non-stop?
In the case I posted in my op, it's like that.
Her mother however after a while supports her daughter's choice seeing how heartbroken and miserable she is without him.
But I guess it's something that you can't really do alone - you need some sort of background for it, it needs to be accepted at least in some way.
To place the happiness of others before your own.
But what if by doing so you truly destroy your own happiness and causes you to be depressed - missing him non-stop?
In the case I posted in my op, it's like that.
Her mother however after a while supports her daughter's choice seeing how heartbroken and miserable she is without him.
But I guess it's something that you can't really do alone - you need some sort of background for it, it needs to be accepted at least in some way.
Oh, I didn't realize this was based on a real story.
This is true, but I really don't think I would ever personally be able to give a murderer of passion or whatever, a second chance. I'd probably agree with my mother on this one, and while not the same as murder we just went through my sister dating a drug dealer five years older than her with a son who nearly killed some kids with an extremely dangerous mix of drugs... I just can't care about "love" in these situations, and much like my mother I'd have to say suck it the fuck up if they're heartbroken.
But that's, of course, for my family. When it comes to strangers/acquaintances I will express my concern but I sure as hell will not control their lives.
This is true, but I really don't think I would ever personally be able to give a murderer of passion or whatever, a second chance. I'd probably agree with my mother on this one, and while not the same as murder we just went through my sister dating a drug dealer five years older than her with a son who nearly killed some kids with an extremely dangerous mix of drugs... I just can't care about "love" in these situations, and much like my mother I'd have to say suck it the fuck up if they're heartbroken.
But that's, of course, for my family. When it comes to strangers/acquaintances I will express my concern but I sure as hell will not control their lives.