If you could go back in time...?


I11I1111I's avatar
i was wondering, people always ask "if you could go back in time and kill Hitler before the Holocaust would you do it?" i was wondering if there were any atheists or other religious folks out there who would go back in time and kill Jesus before all of this happened, how would you do it and why?
Comments151
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
stoneman123's avatar
Christianity has had such a tremendous impact on Western history that without it, the modern era would be unrecognizable. America and the nations of Europe may never have formed, being replaced instead by different nations and cultures. America has a lot of problems, many of them thanks to Christianity, but it's still my home, and using time travel as irresponsibly as that would be like using a nuclear weapon to kill the cockroaches in your house.

Furthermore, I wouldn't go back in time and kill Hitler, either. As a result of that madman's useless pogroms, boatloads of those smart Jews came over to work for us. Albert Einstein's the most famous example, but I'm sure there are more. I also hear that WWII was very good for the U.S. economy, and if that's the case, deleting that whole event from history might put us in worse economic standing than we are now.
tacosteev's avatar
The game red alert touched on that idea. Someone went back and took out hitler while he was still young. The result was no nazi Germany to keep Stalin in check and Stalin starts WW2.
It's isn't a good idea, time machines, as anyone can read on fictional books, is the way history got screwed up.
I11I1111I's avatar
They should make time machines illegal.
Yeah. History can be very weird if they don't. Though because history has already happened, we know what will happen if time travelers went wild.
I11I1111I's avatar
i suppose we could come up with a strict set of rules governing the practice, like Asimov did with robotics. Maybe we could send probes back through time that would let us see and hear the past as it happened, perhaps through some kind of 3-Dimensional interface that let us freely wander the time period... but, i guess, that could also lead to some kind of unforeseen Heisenbergian observational contamination tho.
Yeah. Like what those Harry Potter ministry of magic did with those time turners. Hide the technology, guard it like hell, allow academic use only.
Black-Allison's avatar
As an atheist, that is the dumbest ass idea I've ever heard. Next you'll be asking if I'd go back in time to kill Santa Clause.


Going back in time to alter something sounds idiotic anyways because you can't control the outcome. I would go back in time to figure out where the fuck I left my expensive gloves though.
I11I1111I's avatar
It must sound like foolishness to you but killing Santa Clause would be easy i'd just have to visit Asia minor at some point between March 16, 270 & December 6, 346 and put a bullet in his head. I know that Atheist don't believe in Santa Clause but historians sure do.

Math and logic are wonderful resources to employ when trying to determine outcomes; but i do agree there are probably a few other things that i would use my Chronoship for.
Black-Allison's avatar
I think it's safe to say, most of the world, atheist or not, doesn't believe in Santa Claus if we're talking about a fat bearded elf who flies around the world delivering toys for good children and lumps of coal for bad ones.

It's one thing to say there was some dude named Nicolas punching blasphemous bishops earning the title of a saint, but it's another thing to say you believe he became a flying magical fat man originating from Finnish fairy tales.
RiONX's avatar
Who's saying that?
Black-Allison's avatar
If you look into the history books, Saint Nicholas was was venerated for having saved some boys from execution, liking children and punching bishops who need to study up on their Bible. That I can believe. Believing he's drives a sleigh pulled by reindeers is another thing.
RiONX's avatar
Or rather "even though other people did believe in Santa Clause that we didn't,".
RiONX's avatar
Who believes that he drives a sleigh pulled by reindeer though? i think i was about 3 when my parents told me that even though other people didn't believe in Santa Clause that we didn't, it wasn't until i was older and decided to do my own research that i discovered that there actually was a real Santa and the whole "him not existing" mythology was just another manifestation of delusion perpetuated by the babylonian church.
Black-Allison's avatar
Exactly. No one believes that crap. It's just fun stuff.


To believe that there was
a) A dude named Saint Nick who was said to give gifts to local children so they named a holiday after him in the olden days.
b) A Finnish fairy story of a magical fairy who give presents to good children and pranks the bad children involving reindeers (which are owned by the Lapland people who live there).
c) Somewhere down the line someone thought it was a great story to combine the two so there wouldn't be a religious issue with believing in fairies. There are a lot of cultures that turned their local fairies and gods into saints so they could keep celebrating those holidays without being blasphemous to other Christians. And Christmas is a pretty popular holiday so it's not weird it's a widely told fairy tale.


So what I'm saying is not believing in Santa is not in the atheist manual, it's in the I fucking grew up manual. I mean I'm really surprised that the OP just said to me "I know atheists don't believe in Santa." What? Does that mean the OP believe in Santa?

Also as an atheist it doesn't mean I don't believe in Jesus, Buddha, or any other historical figure, I just don't believe they were anything more than a human who thought about things.
View all replies
Kalinka-Shadows's avatar
That's a dumb idea, the fact he was martyred is what started his cult to begin with. A time traveler wanting to undo the effects of Christianity and Islam in this world would have to expose Jesus as a Fraud, not kill him.
I11I1111I's avatar
well if your purpose was to stop both religions couldn't they just go back in time and kill Abraham before Issac and Ishmael were ever born?
Kalinka-Shadows's avatar
Killing people makes things worse.
I11I1111I's avatar
Well we believe that, but i don't think that they did.
Mr-bananasham's avatar
I would bro it out with jesus, buy him some levend bread, maybe some blood of christ, we would get so wasted.
I11I1111I's avatar
i bet he probably was a pretty cool guy to hang out with, bet he smoked some killer bud as well.
Mr-bananasham's avatar
pffft, you wish that was all he did.
I11I1111I's avatar
What are you suggesting, that he was popping the 1UPS like he was one of the Mario bros.?
Mr-bananasham's avatar
I'm suggesting that, that was not sand on his face in all of those pictures.