I got mental disorders and you can't "grow out of them" or "get over them" you have to get tools in order to deal with them and cope and people who should try meetings, classes/etc/other in order to cope with a person who has mental disorders. like counseling/family counseling sort thing. typically mental disorders are genetic but sometimes they are environmental.
I think it's much more than being told to "get over it". I've suffered from being bi-polar, depressed, and suicidal most of my life. I'm actually looking at a disorder call BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), because that seems to fit my behaviors and mood better than anything else I've found so far. If I could "get over it", I would very gladly do so. It's hard to wake up sometimes, it's hard to smile and act like it's ok when all I want to do is stay hidden in my room, away from people. It's something that can be helped, but it takes patience and understanding and support. No offense but your mom sounds like a manipulative and close minded woman if she treats you that way. I think you can get professional help, or that with the right support you can learn to cope with and live with your depression on your own. Again, it takes patience and support.
*hug* If you need to talk, I'll listen without judgement.
And to follow that up, being depressed and anxious can physically harm you. It can actually kill someone. It's a very serious thing.
How it develops? It's a chemical unbalance in the brain. It's one reason people go onto medicine for it, to help the chemicals stabilize or some such. I feel it is hereditary, but that you can become depressed over time by constantly being in positions that hurt you, that make you feel bad about yourself, that make you feel worthless, etc; (such as physical abuse, sexual abuse, mental abuse, so on and so forth).
brainninja11Featured By OwnerDec 6, 2012Student General Artist
People can and have gotten over problems like depression on their own. I did. However, I in no way think that it's the kind of thing that most people can do. My girlfriend has depression, and I can honestly say that she almost certainly can't get over it alone. She needs anti depressants and people to talk to (sometimes therapy). You shouldn't feel like a weak person for having these problems, because it's not something you can control. Often when people with depression or suicidal tendencies try to get over it alone, it ends badly.
TheLiarWolframFeatured By OwnerDec 5, 2012Student Filmographer
It'd be cool if I could will my hallucinations and abandonment issues away. It'd be cool not to have borderline personality disorder. Mental illness is no different than any other illness. If people treated any other sickness the way they treat mental illness, it'd be deplorable, and your mom should know that.
While I do think there are cases where people are being over-diagnosed or there is a certain level of placebo effect with medications, just telling someone to toughen up doesn't really help anyone. The issue you're dealing with may not be a deep clinical depression that requires medication, it could just be teenage hormones creating extreme mood swings, or other similar factors (low blood sugar exacerbates mood swings for me). It might also be a real depressive episode w/o being a deep clinical depression. Medication might help, but so might therapy; many psychiatrists recommend a combination of both. People like your parents often dismiss therapy as well, I'm not sure. Then again, pursuing self-help means looking outside yourself for resources.
I'd also add that for someone experiencing depression, it's very hard to even seek help or to imagine that there's a way of fixing the problem. So you're not really inclined to do so, which can be pretty dangerous. Telling someone to toughen up can actually exacerbate feelings of low self-worth, since you see yourself as incapable of even that. I'm quite familiar with this way of thinking.
This link provides a pretty interesting conversation about drug companies, research, anti-depressants, placebos, and other psych drugs. He's talking primarily about American and Canadian medicine, but I'm sure people in other parts of the world would find this video interesting too.
I happen to think that American culture at least is too drug-depended and really needs to work on getting away from the idea that pills can cure everything. Sometimes a little hard work, both with help and without it, does more good for a person in the long run than just turning to meds.
If they were impossible to overcome, you'd probably be living in a mental hospital. I know its hard, but I have anxiety/depression too. Or maybe I should say they are controllable, I still get anxious, but I believe I can either get better, or get worse. (you couldn't stop anxiety/depression 100% because everyone gets nervous and sad sometimes...) You just gotta find what works for you. I think it can develop through anything, for me it was hereditary.