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August 17, 2006
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I Hate My Boyfriend

:iconjillinthebox:
JillinTheBox Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I hate my boyfriend. I've been dealing with his complete lack of anger managment for a year and a half, everything from getting plates thrown at me to having my car keys stolen so I physically can't leave him.

He won't let me break-up with him, though. I've dumped in FIVE times and every time he imediately switches from raging maniac to victimized puppy and physically holds me down or follows me in his car to force me to stay with him by either crying and begging forgiveness or just saying that he'll kill himself if he has to live without me. I can't get rid of him!!

I've tried everything. I've lied to him so he'll fin out and get mad at me, I've told him to his face that I hate him, I've acted like a nasty bitch 24/7, and I even did drugs behind his back so he'd think I was rediculous and leave me....but no!

This shit happens to girls all the time I know. I just don't knwo how many girls end up with legally-mental boyfriends that own entire arsenals. I'm desperate to get away from him, I'll do anything! I just don't know what's left to do besides cheat on him and I can't do that because with his jealously someone will be either dead or severly maimed. I hate him so much and I just want out. What is there left to do??
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:iconjillinthebox:
JillinTheBox Featured By Owner Aug 18, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yea, he'd be sitting right next to his brother and his best friend if he got locked up. What a wholesome family, eh? Thank you for the idea, it's not hard to get him worked up either.
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:iconglori305:
Glori305 Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Restraining order.

Then, enforce it.
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:iconcigarettesofcandy:
cigarettesOFcandy Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
basically.
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:iconim-fine-again:
im-fine-again Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006   Photographer
Walk away and don't look back.
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:iconimalittleteapot:
Imalittleteapot Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
you're not loving yourself if you keep this relationship going. love is about give and take. do you really think this relationship could last? you deserve more than that. i've sort of been in the situation you are in, and it took me a while to realize that a breakup was the best option. he's just using you for his own emotional sustenance. if you care about yourself, just get out of it.
it's hard to break up with someone, but sometimes it's the only way. call the police if you're scared for yours or anyone else's safety. ya gotta put yourself first in this kind of situation.
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:iconmunkeyscare:
munkeyscare Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Break up with him and get a restraining order if you have to... I had to deal with a situation like this once... And the guy didn't kill himself and is actually happy with someone else and grateful that I finally made him quit being a babyabout it
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:iconjillinthebox:
JillinTheBox Featured By Owner Aug 18, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I wish he would just find someone else but he's convinced he never would, like an idiot. It's just that I believe it when he says he'll kill himself or something because he tried to with the last bitch he was with. But yea, he is being a huge baby, it's amazing that I'm 5 years younger and he's the one that has fits like a 2-year-old :dohtwo:
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:iconmunkeyscare:
munkeyscare Featured By Owner Aug 18, 2006
If you really want him to quit, then you are going to have to stand up for yourself. If you are afraid that he is going to try to kill himself, then tell one of his friends so they can make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.
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:iconrustedwings:
rustedwings Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
You have to understand that he won't kill himself. I've been in a borderline abusive situation before and one friend said something to me that really changed my perspective and helped me take charge:

If he's treating you like this it's because he's selfish and doesn't honestly care about you. The most important thing to him is himself, and because of that he would never put himself in any real danger, and he certainly won't kill himself. You're the only person in real danger in this situation.

As for wanting another girl to come in and take him away, don't give yourself the easy way out! If you don't want to be with him that's the end of the story. Break up, don't take the calls, don't give in, report him to the police every time he won't stay away. You have a change to take charge and put yourself in a better situation, aren't you worth that?
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:iconcyla:
cyla Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Restraining order.
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:icondjl2k:
DJL2K Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006   Photographer
If the abuse continues get the police round.
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:iconbabelanger:
babelanger Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Professional General Artist
err... RUN! you're in an ABUSIVE relationship
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:iconerzeugen:
Erzeugen Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Go what the people here are saying: Dump him and get out. He may have a serious behaviour (sp?) disorder so you better seek some help on that too.
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:iconmunashiibennu:
munashiibennu Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Dump him and don't go back to him, no matter what he says or does. Get a restraining order on him, if you have to.
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:iconcausticardor:
causticardor Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
Sounds like my ex-fiance'. Well, up until one night he beat the shit out of me and called his parents to come over and help him move at 10:30 at night. Stole a thousand dollars and some furniture from me and married another girl a year later.

Get the hell out. Don't talk to him, don't let him talk to you. Block his phone, block his text messages, move somewhere else. Live with your parents, live with a friend, go somewhere he won't find you. Be completely devoid of contact with him for three months, and then... he'll be gone. Three months, I'm telling you.

Every time you let him back into your life, you show him you're pathetic and easily influenced. Do you want to be sending him that message?
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:iconjillinthebox:
JillinTheBox Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That sounds exactly like him, you're ex-fiance. I would prefer if he dumped me for another girl though, i'd love it if some girl walked in, took him all for herself, and let me be!

I'll do like you just said though, not answer his calls and shit. You're the one with the best advice if you've been there before. Thanks for taking the time to post, it means alot
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:iconyrmomma:
yrmomma Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Go JillinTheBox, you can DO IT!!!!! Leave that rat bastard behind and get on with your life!!!
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:iconcausticardor:
causticardor Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
You're quite welcome. I hate seeing people in relationships similar to what I was in, especially now that I've found a man who was nothing like my ex-fiance'.

For the most part, I think women date these abusive men because they think they may be able to change them, or because they think they can't get anyone else, and neither of these things are true. Statistics show there are something like a hundred people out there who are your "one true love." Even though that's quite a small number compared to how many people there are in the world, it at least means that you don't have to settle for second-best, because there IS someone out there who will treat you like a princess, and whom you will love enough to want to treat them like a prince.

Good luck. :hug:
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:iconwarm-winter:
warm-winter Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
woh well
he obviously has some serious problems
if he wont leave you alone, tell the polive ur situation and they might give you a restraining order and put him in rehab cus he ses hes guna kil himself. its not fair for you to continue living in fear of him so u shud go to the police about it. do ur friends and family no? cus they will definately help you.
the only place wer i went rong is with the drugs, but apart from that u handled this really well n i feel so sorry for you xx
hope this helps :hugs:
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:iconjillinthebox:
JillinTheBox Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I never really considered police, though. I'm not exactly the kind of person that wants the cops in my business. :/ Thank you for the :hugs: though, you're so nice to care! ^-^
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:iconwarm-winter:
warm-winter Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
ur welcome, but ur situatin does sound serious enough to get them involved
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:iconchromius:
Chromius Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
Dump him and quit giving in to his guilt trips. With explosive out of control behaviour like that, you never know when he might have that one snap where he'll end up seriously injuring or killing you.

He sounds like he's just taking advantage of the fact that you can be manipulated into taking him back anyways.
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