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January 20, 2013


Replies: 42

Feeling lonely from being alone

I've been feeling like this for QUITE some time now....and I...I...I don't know what to do.

I'm 17 years old and in search of finding that special someone....ever since I broke up with my girlfriend who I met on dA back in September after 4 months...and the fact that on February 12, my best friend will have been with his girlfriend, whom he found on dA, for one year. What's worse is that I find my best friend's GF.....kinda cute :blushes:

Is it normal for a 17 year old to go looking for love?....Am I looking in the RIGHT PLACES?...The fact that I'm shy, timid and nervous around girls makes it the worst of my problems...

Could I please have help/advice?

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Devious Comments

LordLooper Jan 27, 2013  Professional Artisan Crafter
Don't worry someone will come eventually to you , i have been lonely for the first time after a lot of relationships and i cant tell you how free and not restricted i can feel, So enjoy yourself and your freedom as long as it lasts :) , Get yourself together and understand that every situation in our life has double si , its up to you which one you choose.
LordLooper Jan 27, 2013  Professional Artisan Crafter
***Get yourself together and understand that every situation in our life has double sides, just like a coint , its up to you which one you choose. ( sorry my keyboard sucks )
Mars-Walker Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Okay, you don't have to agree with me at all, but I'm going to lay out my thinking on this.

I'm 24 and never found that 'special someone.'

And dammit I'm happy for that. A lot of people, for some reason or another, are frankly psychotic, most of the 'good people' have found each other already. I've seen so many 'cute couples' turn on each other and fall apart while scorching the earth all around them; the aftermaths can be especially awful when they use their 'youthful' naivete as an excuse (and it IS no excuse) not to practice this thing called birth control. 'Romance' and 'love' are words that are recklessly overused and in some extreme cases are verbal precursors to abusive relationships.

Imo, its not worth your time, especially when you can't support yourself, or even feel like you are currently worthy partner material (and if you don't 'feel' it, you aren't). By putting yourself in an 'active search' mode, your putting stress on yourself to conform to this ideal that may not be worth going for right now. 'Loneliness' is largely a social construct; many many many people 'feel' lonely because they're told to be lonely by mass media culture, and/or obnoxious relatives/"friends"/acquaintances that need to learn to mind their own goddamn business and not stress, manipulate, and control other peoples lives.

So don't stress yourself out over this. Shy around girls? Relax and just be a friend with girls, and just a friend. And yes I know some boys may say you're gay or a loser, but for gods sakes please ignore them, they DON'T have your best interests in mind. Love will come someday, you don't need to force it to happen, and imho, you shouldn't. At 17 you are absolutely not ready for anything that will last long, and anybody that tells you otherwise is full of shit. College is a better place, especially with the increase in maturity. Right now, just focus on learning, exploring, and building up friendships and acquaintances. Those are my thoughts.
edaofblacklagoon Jan 23, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
yeah! finding love is happiness. but make sure its PURE or TRUE LOVE. not only for games. cause mostly those guys are the same age as u usually toying relationship oftenly. not taking it seriously, so if ur going to love again. make sure u'll choose the right one. or if u can't find the love. games are there for u. LAWL!
JStar19000 Jan 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You know, if i had the chance, I would come over there and sit on the couch with you and eat pizza and watch your favorite movie with you if i could.
But i can't.

so you have to be nice to yourself since i can't be over there.

TTFNJinx Jan 22, 2013  Student Interface Designer
I know how you feel. I'm the same age and honestly all I can think about is getting away from the immature experimental relationships of high school and moving on to a serious relationship with a future. I Mindanao went through one for a year but I broke up the guy and we went off and on until three months ago. Until recently ive felt heart broken (mainly because he wouldn't leave me alone) .

All I can say is talking helps and listening to music and getting out and about. Idk why but going to the mall helped me.
Dude, I'm 18, and I went through everything you did to the T. I used to be in a dA relationship way back when I first started off, so I know how you feel man. From my perspective, if I see a girl I like at school or at some local place, I'll try to talk to her. Losing your nervousness around girls isn't too hard if you start trying to be friends with them.
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