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January 7, 2013
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Communication and Interaction

:iconnickkartha:
NickKartha Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I've never really been able to talk clearly. The things that come out of my mouth are vague and often un-understandable. My body language, too, reflects clumsiness and idiocy and I can't really look at a person's eyes while speaking to them.
I really want to change.

Help me with Life.
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:iconcrazycartoonist12:
Crazycartoonist12 Jan 27, 2013  Student Filmographer
Trust me, your not alone. Ive been that way myself since sixth grade. i feel literally frightend to look someone in the eyes and sometimes i'll say a sentence and the person im talking to will have no idea what ive said. an idea would be trying to join a club or sport team (if you like sports) who knows, maybe youll make some new friends or people who have simalar interests. I know this has been already said, but talking to a counsoler could be good for you too. You could practice talking and learn some social skills. Thats all I got. Hope this helps.

-CC12
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:iconnoleah:
noleah Jan 26, 2013   Digital Artist
I can honestly say I know how you feel. I was practically forced to go to a counselor because it is interfering in my work life. I can't talk to people without getting butterflies in my stomach, I'll shake, do things wrong because I'm so nervous, my voice gets very quite, and I'll forget important things. All on a daily basis with pretty much everyone I meet, even people I've known for months. I only feel comfortable with someone after being able to relate and talk to them them for so long I finally get it through my head that they aren't judging me or my actions and they have managed to understand me on some level. My counselor has basically told me that thoughts, emotions, and feelings, change how we act, even on a subconscious level. If your looking at everything you do as negative, and then you do something wrong you may immediately assume everyone noticed and thinks less of you. And while most of us know that isn't true, we still can't get rid of those thoughts. I'm only in the beginnings of my counseling, but I've been told to put myself in uncomfortable situations on purpose, in order to expose myself to them and show myself they really aren't so bad after all. And if you get especially nervous, learning certain breathing and muscle relaxation techniques can help calm you.

One of the people I know was pretty similar to me, though not as bad. Now you would never guess he could have been shy. If it is truly bothering you this much and its interfering with your life, I suggest a counselor. I may hate going to the sessions, but I know its going to help. This is good that you were able to come out with this. It took me a long to time to come to terms with just how shy and socially awkward I am and that I needed to see someone about it. Apparently I have a social disorder, and I wouldn't doubt the same is true for you.
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:iconramebomango:
RameboMango Jan 25, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Are you shy?

This might sound a little weird, But if that is the case, do something that you could never image yourself doing ( Positive things).
i've heard that sometimes a traumatic or ext ream life changing experiences can help and change a persons social life. (Like Jumping out of a plane.. bungie jumping..)
For me, i used to be pretty shy, then i went to an anime expo... and i found SO many people who liked what i liked and acted like how i acted when i was alone and i just felt REBORN. Personally that is one of the most significant experiences for me Socially. And after that life felt much easier, yes i still do have my shy tendancys, but i just think back to that time and i know i can make it.

So good luck
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:iconnickkartha:
NickKartha Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well no and that's exactly my problem.
In the real world, I don't say things that make sense. The only reason I make sense to you is because I can edit whatever I type. I can't edit the words that come out of my mouth. My problem isn't enunciation or pronunciation or anything like that. It's just making coherent sentences.
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:iconramebomango:
RameboMango Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Then i'd say practice public speaking, you can practice any where until speaking comes easier for you.
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:iconkandroid96:
kandroid96 Jan 24, 2013  Professional Photographer
Have you ever tried talking to yourself? I used to be much worse at gathering thoughts and saying what was on my mind. Talking to yourself in isolation will give you some experience for when you talk in the real world. Studies also suggest that those that talk to themselves have a higher IQ than individuals that don't Feel free to look that up on your own time. I do have two articles for other benefits of talking to yourself though.

[link]

[link]
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:iconmonkeydoodles:
Keep talking to people. Make small talk with cashiers, waiters, random people that you'll probably never see again and where your interaction will be very low pressure. Practice speaking clearly, give yourself a little time to reply to things. Learn some stock responses -- there are certain subjects, like weather, where people will always say the same thing. Listen to how people have conversations. You can take the things they say and use them in your conversations.

Start keeping a journal, where you can write/type your thoughts about events that happen during your day. This will help you clarify things better before you say them.

Also work on your self-esteem. Set goals which are meaningful to you, that run anywhere from small to large. Eat healthy foods and get enough sleep. Exercise regularly. I've found that really helps with posture and body language.
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:icon2lazy2talk:
2lazy2talk Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
therapy?
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:iconnickkartha:
NickKartha Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
too expensive.
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:iconjericawinters:
Have you tried reading out loud every day?
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