My Mom tells me I NEED makeup to look nice
Whenever I don't wear makeup she tells me I NEED it. "You look tired" "You look too pale"
I had a job for a while and I would go not wearing makeup and always had a clean uniform and my hair pulled back neatly.
After leaving that job I got a new one where I was able to dress up. My mother said "You always went to your old job looking hideous."
One thing that really bothers me is that she constantly complains about my scent. I shower and brush my teeth regularly as well as floss and gargle but she always says "You don't smell fresh" or "your breath stinks", even when she's far from me.
My friends and I are very honest with each other and whenever they smell bad I let them know and they do the same for me. However, no one really ever complains about my scent and they usually always compliment me. I get nervous about letting people close to me because my mom always says I smell bad.
They don't know how bad my mom makes me feel about it so I'm certain they aren't being dishonest to spare my feelings. Even strangers have complimented my looks and scent on days my mom said I either smelled bad (which is every day) or needed makeup.
I don't tan or try to wear fake tanners and my mom always tells me that I am TOO pale. Whenever she says something about me needing makeup or a tan I say "I'm perfectly happy with how I look."
I really am generally pleased with my natural appearance. The only thing I disliked was my frizzy hair, but after trying the "no shampoo" hair washing routine several people suggested, my hair is no longer the frizzy mess it was.
My mom is very kind and sacrifices so much so that I can have a good life so I know she cares about me but these comments are hurtful. I know she doesn't say these things to hurt me and thinks in a way she's helping. I tell tell her I don't like being told I need makeup or that I smell even after I have washed up and she usually just says "Well you obviously didn't wash up enough" or "you're being too sensitive".
I have no idea how to get her to stop. She's even made comments about me looking "weird" or "crazy" in front of my boyfriend. It's so embarrassing but he always assures me that I look nice.
Does anyone else have this type of issue?
I had a job for a while and I would go not wearing makeup and always had a clean uniform and my hair pulled back neatly.
After leaving that job I got a new one where I was able to dress up. My mother said "You always went to your old job looking hideous."
One thing that really bothers me is that she constantly complains about my scent. I shower and brush my teeth regularly as well as floss and gargle but she always says "You don't smell fresh" or "your breath stinks", even when she's far from me.
My friends and I are very honest with each other and whenever they smell bad I let them know and they do the same for me. However, no one really ever complains about my scent and they usually always compliment me. I get nervous about letting people close to me because my mom always says I smell bad.
They don't know how bad my mom makes me feel about it so I'm certain they aren't being dishonest to spare my feelings. Even strangers have complimented my looks and scent on days my mom said I either smelled bad (which is every day) or needed makeup.
I don't tan or try to wear fake tanners and my mom always tells me that I am TOO pale. Whenever she says something about me needing makeup or a tan I say "I'm perfectly happy with how I look."
I really am generally pleased with my natural appearance. The only thing I disliked was my frizzy hair, but after trying the "no shampoo" hair washing routine several people suggested, my hair is no longer the frizzy mess it was.
My mom is very kind and sacrifices so much so that I can have a good life so I know she cares about me but these comments are hurtful. I know she doesn't say these things to hurt me and thinks in a way she's helping. I tell tell her I don't like being told I need makeup or that I smell even after I have washed up and she usually just says "Well you obviously didn't wash up enough" or "you're being too sensitive".
I have no idea how to get her to stop. She's even made comments about me looking "weird" or "crazy" in front of my boyfriend. It's so embarrassing but he always assures me that I look nice.
Does anyone else have this type of issue?
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tell her to fuck off and that outer beauty is a primitive tribal tradition followed by savages.
what you think of yourself is important. what others think is of little consequence.
what you think of yourself is important. what others think is of little consequence.
That's so mean... At a time, I weighed 7 kilos more than I do now, which was 65 kilos, (I am 160 cm long) and she kept telling me that I looked fat. I really got hurt actually but I started exercising and now, when I look at old pictures I am glad she said it. Because saying "honey I love you but you need to exercise a bit, you will feel better", that would not have made me exercise. Do you know what I mean? Also she sometimes say I look ugly in some of my tops or t-shirts, but I just say that she look ugly too and then we laugh so I don't think she really means it in a hard way.
But try to talk to her, I had to talk to my mother and say that I actually got hurt and she said that she didn't mean it like that. The best you can do is talk it out with her!
Good luck
But try to talk to her, I had to talk to my mother and say that I actually got hurt and she said that she didn't mean it like that. The best you can do is talk it out with her!
Good luck
Tell her exactly how she makes you feel. Be polite, but honest and blunt.
I can totally relate!!
My mom doesn't criticize me about make-up, but I seriously can't remember the last time I went out without wearing any! I'm a ginger and my eyelashes are blonde so it makes my eyes look puny...I was so down on myself so putting on makeup become like, a routine since about the 5th grade. :S
Sometimes I wish I had just never started wearing it in the first place.
But this is not your case!! If you feel confident without any makeup, show it to the world, girl! Let them know you love yourself and your natural looks, and you don't give a damn what they think!!
My mom doesn't criticize me about make-up, but I seriously can't remember the last time I went out without wearing any! I'm a ginger and my eyelashes are blonde so it makes my eyes look puny...I was so down on myself so putting on makeup become like, a routine since about the 5th grade. :S
Sometimes I wish I had just never started wearing it in the first place.
But this is not your case!! If you feel confident without any makeup, show it to the world, girl! Let them know you love yourself and your natural looks, and you don't give a damn what they think!!
She's probably jealous of your youth, I'm not joking. If you look in the mirror and are happy with what you see then live and be happy! Don't let anything take that away from you.
Well, considering you haven't posted up a dozen whoreish pictures of yourself on your page, you either have enough self respect to not give a damn, or you're ugly as shit. So either take your mom's advice or tell her to piss off.
Okay, so, first off, nobody needs make-up to look pretty. Not even if you have scars on your face or something. It's just you, and it sounds like you do a great job of "owning it" already! Honestly, I know far more people who look worse with make-up than without because they don't blend well or use clashing colors.
Secondly, it sounds like you're doing a good job handling it, so, you know. Keep on truckin'. My best guess? Your mom loves you. But she loves you in a way that makes her want your to be great, possibly even perfect. You're not perfect, and that bothers her. But she'll get over it eventually
Secondly, it sounds like you're doing a good job handling it, so, you know. Keep on truckin'. My best guess? Your mom loves you. But she loves you in a way that makes her want your to be great, possibly even perfect. You're not perfect, and that bothers her. But she'll get over it eventually
I don't say I have this issue and I'm also a little bit of a smart ass so if my mom said I needed a tan I'd say I'm going for the vampire look. If you think you look fine and smell fine then you probably do and your mom might just be too hung up on appearances and she might want you to look a certain way but that's her issue and not yours. If everyone else thinks you look fine then you're doing something right and one person's comment, and it doesn't matter whose, does not cancel that out. Just remember to stay happy with yourself and her opinion is not the most important one, yours is.
your mother shouldn't talk to you like that. It's not okay. Let her know these comments hurt you. With words she just can't misunderstand like " Mom, please stop this. It really hurts to hear this all the time. How would you feel, if I tell you every day how tired you look and that you're getting older? That is not okay mom" If she doesn't want to understand this and keeps on with this, change your attitude. Don't let her push you down. You have a mouth you're allowed to speak with and you have words that are allowed to be heard. If you like your face without make up you're allowed to tell her exactly this. If you like how your hair looks, you're allowed to say: No Mom, I like my hair today. Keep your head up. Nobody, not even your mother, can give inferiority feelings, if you don't allow them to do so.
Maybe she's jealous of you being this young and pretty and thinks she never had all that..?
Just guessing, I can be wrong....
Just guessing, I can be wrong....
mum needs to mind her own business and keep her opinions to herself.
tell her so.
tell her so.
Well, obviously you're happy with yourself and that's what matters most. But when someone makes these comments its going to affect you. Maybe try talking to her again. It seems to be her problem with you, not anyone else's. But be gentle. She doesn't seem to know she's in the wrong :/
Don't wear makeup. It ruins your skin and your self-esteem. Of course, there are situations where a small amount of makeup is appropriate. Job interviews, weddings, important meetings with clients, etc. It sounds very much like your mother is trying to tear your down because of her own poor self-esteem. No parent I know would accuse their child, or anyone for that matter, of looking weird and smelling bad after that that person took a shower, brushed their hair, and dressed up in nice clothing.
As far as getting your mother to stop, I recommend organizing your reasons for not wearing makeup all the time and presenting them to her in a very matter-of-fact way. If in-person won't work, then write her a letter. Make it clear that you have good reasons and aren't just being a belligerent teenager. Also make it clear that you will not continue to tolerate her constant criticism. After that, verbally shut her down politely but firmly any time she brings it up.
Good luck!
As far as getting your mother to stop, I recommend organizing your reasons for not wearing makeup all the time and presenting them to her in a very matter-of-fact way. If in-person won't work, then write her a letter. Make it clear that you have good reasons and aren't just being a belligerent teenager. Also make it clear that you will not continue to tolerate her constant criticism. After that, verbally shut her down politely but firmly any time she brings it up.
Good luck!
Tell her she's looking old.
4 bad breath, tongue scrapper. for b/o find the right deodorant or body spray 4 u. as far as make up in my opinion very few females need it to look better, even so a little goes a long way. as for you mom y not surprise her with a makeover night where u do each others make up. have a sit down to try & find some common ground or just to simply talk it out (try to avoid argument)(lol 4 each day she doesnt wear make up, u will wear it).
oooooooor maybe ur weird just like the rest of us lol
oooooooor maybe ur weird just like the rest of us lol
BE YOURSELF! Life's too short to be the one others want you to be, and as Long as your friends and you are happy with it, SHE will have to live with it.
don't let yourself be pushed to do htings you don't like, you won't be happy with it.
my mum and aunt always told me i should wear high heels, Dress up and such.
they told m i needed to go to Discos and met new People but i never did.
on one vacation my best friend, my mum and aunt were going into a Disco (i had to)
and my aunt flirted with the 40 year old dj, when leaving she grabbed a 18-year-oldes ass
she never met before.
i may tell you, she was married at that time, and had one Lover besides her husband, she could
never decide. my Cousin was the one who had to live with this shit - of course he wasn't happy with it.
i don't want to tel you that your mum is JUST LIKE my aunt but sometimes People who do
this stuff have Problems they never talk about. maybe you try to see it this way ...
don't let yourself be pushed to do htings you don't like, you won't be happy with it.
my mum and aunt always told me i should wear high heels, Dress up and such.
they told m i needed to go to Discos and met new People but i never did.
on one vacation my best friend, my mum and aunt were going into a Disco (i had to)
and my aunt flirted with the 40 year old dj, when leaving she grabbed a 18-year-oldes ass
she never met before.
i may tell you, she was married at that time, and had one Lover besides her husband, she could
never decide. my Cousin was the one who had to live with this shit - of course he wasn't happy with it.
i don't want to tel you that your mum is JUST LIKE my aunt but sometimes People who do
this stuff have Problems they never talk about. maybe you try to see it this way ...
If your mother is insulting you like that, no offense, she might be trying to protect you, but I think she might not realize that she's acting a little bit paranoid. You should try talking to her about the fact that you don't want to wear makeup.
Jesus! And I thought my mom was bad! She has forced me to go to makeup counters when she would drive me to work before I had a licence and say to the counter, "She was going to go to work like this!" I would tell her how my friends would compliment me on my looks, but she would always counter it, saying they weren't lookers themselves.
She still comments on my acne marks. I've actually discovered that she stopped being so critical of my appearance once I was critical about hers. "Mom, you have a big blemish there. Why haven't you put your makeup on yet? That shirt makes you look too boxy. Can't you fix the back of your hair so it's not so flat?" I don't recommend this method, but it's worked for me, even though it wasn't like I was trying to be nasty. I was used to it being done to me. Now, when she comments about my smell or looks, I just say "Yeah I KNOW. I'm a damn animal. THANKS for giving me your defective DNA, I inherited this shit."
She still comments on my acne marks. I've actually discovered that she stopped being so critical of my appearance once I was critical about hers. "Mom, you have a big blemish there. Why haven't you put your makeup on yet? That shirt makes you look too boxy. Can't you fix the back of your hair so it's not so flat?" I don't recommend this method, but it's worked for me, even though it wasn't like I was trying to be nasty. I was used to it being done to me. Now, when she comments about my smell or looks, I just say "Yeah I KNOW. I'm a damn animal. THANKS for giving me your defective DNA, I inherited this shit."
You don't need makeup. Just wear a bag with a smiley face.
My mom is exactly the opposite. She'd be like: "Why are you wearing make-up? You look fine as it is." or "Don't put on too much or you'll look silly or older, than you are." 
She doesn't think make-up is evil or anything, she just cares too much. And I don't even wear that much make-up, the only things I do is emphasize my eye-brows and put on mascara and maybe eye-liner once in a few months. No foundation, powder etc.
You need to explain to your mom that her words are hurtful and make you feel bad about yourself. As your mother I'm sure she doesn't want to hurt you, so if you explain to her that her actions are hurting you, she might stop.
She doesn't think make-up is evil or anything, she just cares too much. And I don't even wear that much make-up, the only things I do is emphasize my eye-brows and put on mascara and maybe eye-liner once in a few months. No foundation, powder etc.
You need to explain to your mom that her words are hurtful and make you feel bad about yourself. As your mother I'm sure she doesn't want to hurt you, so if you explain to her that her actions are hurting you, she might stop.
awwww that's horrible, she seems to just have a very looks focused view of things, and possibly a sexist one, thinking its unreasonable for a woman not to constantly be adding things to make themselves look fancyTry appealing to her sense of reason and logic, explain it like you did here
if she is too ignorant to listen, then her opinion isn't worth taking seriously in the first place!
1. Bullcrap
2. I never wear make up, except for the occasional light powder for bad acne days. Im 21, and very rarely use it. As far as your mother, I do not know her, but she sounds extremely paranoid. She may, deep down, only tryong to help, but her methods are wrong. You do not have to wear make up. I do not, and I get compliments. You obviously do too. I think she is just a victim of a society that thinks "if you do not wear 50 pounds of make up to look like you have perfect flawless skin and smell the way socisty says, then something is wrong" trap.
3. As for scents, I can not really be fair. I am a hyperosmiac, so all scents, good or bad, ate exyrely stong to me. So, I can not ise anything too scented or I get major headaches. I would say, as long as your friends and co workers do not complain, do not worry. Trust me, if it is an issue, it will be brought up by somebody.
4. My granmother always asked me why i never wore make up and complained about me too. But whenever I asked anyone about it, I never got a bad reaction. My mother still does this to me. I am in vollege now, and I have never gotten a complaint.
You seem to be doing fine on your own. I think your mom is being paranoid. Keep up what you do. :3
2. I never wear make up, except for the occasional light powder for bad acne days. Im 21, and very rarely use it. As far as your mother, I do not know her, but she sounds extremely paranoid. She may, deep down, only tryong to help, but her methods are wrong. You do not have to wear make up. I do not, and I get compliments. You obviously do too. I think she is just a victim of a society that thinks "if you do not wear 50 pounds of make up to look like you have perfect flawless skin and smell the way socisty says, then something is wrong" trap.
3. As for scents, I can not really be fair. I am a hyperosmiac, so all scents, good or bad, ate exyrely stong to me. So, I can not ise anything too scented or I get major headaches. I would say, as long as your friends and co workers do not complain, do not worry. Trust me, if it is an issue, it will be brought up by somebody.
4. My granmother always asked me why i never wore make up and complained about me too. But whenever I asked anyone about it, I never got a bad reaction. My mother still does this to me. I am in vollege now, and I have never gotten a complaint.
You seem to be doing fine on your own. I think your mom is being paranoid. Keep up what you do. :3
You could always try talking to her about it and telling her how hurtful her comments are? From what I hear of your mother, she sounds like a generally reasonable person, so for all you know she might just take your words to heart and stop.
If that doesn't work, you could try ignoring her or saying something along the lines of, "Thanks for your input, but I am the one who makes the decisions about whether I wear makeup or not, and I have decided not to. I'm happy with myself the way I am, and if you don't like it then that's your problem."
As for the body odour thing... well, you stated that you and your friends are honest to each other about those sorts of things, and that they haven't pointed it out. Your mum is likely overreacting or trying to make sure you're washing daily and the like, and going about doing so the wrong way. So, again, try talking to your mum about it.
It's great that you're happy with your appearance, though. There are so many people out there who aren't, and it's a great feeling to have. I applaud you for that, and wish you luck with your mum. <3
If that doesn't work, you could try ignoring her or saying something along the lines of, "Thanks for your input, but I am the one who makes the decisions about whether I wear makeup or not, and I have decided not to. I'm happy with myself the way I am, and if you don't like it then that's your problem."
As for the body odour thing... well, you stated that you and your friends are honest to each other about those sorts of things, and that they haven't pointed it out. Your mum is likely overreacting or trying to make sure you're washing daily and the like, and going about doing so the wrong way. So, again, try talking to your mum about it.
It's great that you're happy with your appearance, though. There are so many people out there who aren't, and it's a great feeling to have. I applaud you for that, and wish you luck with your mum. <3
Ignore your mother. If she's not getting a reaction from you for like three weeks or more she might just shut up. It's worth a try.