Hello, I am a counselor, and minister. To me I think you just need to find some self confidence. It's ok if you don't feel the same about a guy. Don't feel bad for them or for you. Life is about making hard decisions. You will feel much better about yourself when you state your likes and dislikes. If you still don't know it's ok to not date at all too to get your emotions in check. Maybe you just have a certain type of guy. Evil forces try to get at you by showing you what you don't want so you know what you do want. . Contact me, if you have any other questions! Thank you.
I wouldn't give any positive signals, I wouldn't ignore but let's say I would keep it on a friendly level. I agree with the others that say you shouldn't let them be like that for months, it's not right. Be polite, but at the same time honest.
He has used the word stalking in reference to a previous girl he liked so that's kinda worrying I'll just have to get it over and done with when I can in the nicest but also most forward way. Thanks for your comment.
'Thank you for being interested, but I don't feel that way'.
As long as he doesn't TELL you or try to do anything about it, he can be attracted to you all he wants. You don't really have that much control over who you like. But he needs to keep it to himself and understand you are NOT interested.
I have cut off friendship with a couple guys over this same situation. I generally tell people I am not looking for romance (I'm married, anyway, but that doesn't stop them) and if I ever suspect- or worse yet hear them say they have 'fallen for me' that is the end of our relationship, period. They don't see me again.
I don't like hurting people or leading them on- or what they may see as leading them on. I don't want all this love crap clogging up a friendship, particularly since I know without a doubt I will NEVER feel the same way.
I knew a guy who was pretty convinced I was going to leave my husband for him- even though I'd taken pains with him to make it clear I wasn't looking for someone else (the situation was kind of odd, I was in one city with my kid, my husband was in another a couple hours away renovating a house and stayed there since he didn't have a car). We were doing OK as friends then he started looking at me that way and I reminded him of my rules.
Sure enough, after knowing eachother for a little while he started going overboard, came to my house one night at 3AM stressing out about not having a girlfriend, not to much longer later maybe a couple weeks, he came by the house again and said 'Hey, you know that thing you told me never to say to you..?' and I just winced and said 'Sorry, man. You know the rules. Bye'