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December 10, 2012
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feeling lonely, helpless...

:iconiokothepanda:
IokoThePanda Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
The Problem: Everytime when Iīm in school with wy friend, I feel good, but when they are ill,... I feel really bad, i feel like donīt fit in! I alway have the feeling that Iīm lonely, the same at home!
I fell all the time lonely...
I donīt have many frinds,
And I donīt have much confidence, even if it looks for other people as I have much!
Yah, maybe Iīm sometimes crayzy, but when other people say that, I feel hurt!
And I still donīt feel pretty! My friend alwys say that im ugly... One time whwn I was in school, there were some some boys.. one sayed: "Hey, are you joking, sheīs so ugly" (I know that he was saying it to me, becouse they always looked into my way... and no other girl was there)
And Iīm quite short, Iīm just 155 cm tall...
I always feel so small...
Sometimes when I walk around The people staring at me, without a reason, loughing at me, when I walk next to them...
Some people find itīs funny, if they put their foot to mine, so that Iīm falling!

What is wrong with me?!
I hate myself, iīm ugly, I have a hateable personality, I donīt have many friends....

Do you have some tipps for me, plese... I canīt take so much feelings.
I feel myself every day more breaking...

please help!
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:iconscatman27:
Scatman27 Dec 19, 2012  Hobbyist
Like many other have said before me, you're only 16, it gets a whole lot better once you graduate. Learn to love you for who you are, and it gets much easier for people to love you back. People will notice if someone hates themselves, and they'll feed on that emotion. I know it might be difficult, I was for the most part in your position in middle school. I shut myself out from the outside, mostly sitting infront of my computer playing games. I didn't have many friends to talk to and I felt kinda lonely at times. I was for example bullied for my real name, which is shared with the name of a mushroom. (I know, silly isnt it?) But once you find friends you love and they love you back, you forget all the things in the past. It seems like you worry too much about how people act in your presence. Most of the time the laughter might be meant for something else, like a conversation or a joke someone just told the said group or person and you just happen to pass by, thinking that the laughter was pointed at you. It's not like that at all. Just ignore it, and don't worry about it. People with little confidence tend to find behaviour or conversations in their presence directed to themselves when they're clearly not.

And from what I can tell from your ID, you're not ugly at all. You're very cute. Don't believe what those boys say about you, or if those comments were directed to you at all. People who make fun of others usually have their own problems to deal with, and by making fun of others, they ease the pain for the moment. But it won't work in the long run. Once guys gets older, they see that beauty don't only lie in looks alone. The boys your age just don't know it yet.

Try talking to someone about your problems. If by some reason you can't talk about it to your friends, talk to your parents, or any siblings you might have. It might feel awkward or embarrassing, but its going to feel so much better once you talk about it.

Once again, youre only 16. you have a whole life ahead of you, most people hated their childhood, but they stood strong and held it together. Just learn to love yourself for who you are and ignore anyone who tells you otherwise. I hope I made some sense in my text, I wish you the best of luck! :)
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IokoThePanda Dec 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thatīs a long text O.O

Thanks for giving me your time, yah I think you are right, Iīll try the best in my future C:
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:iconscatman27:
Scatman27 Dec 20, 2012  Hobbyist
youre very welcome :)
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:iconiokothepanda:
IokoThePanda Dec 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconcutederpplz:
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:iconsignsofortune:
Dear IokoThePanda,

You do not have a hateable personality; what you are is normal, and nice. Unfortunately there are some mean people at school, who treat nice people badly. Those mean people are louder than the nice people, but that does not mean they are more common. Unfortunately, meanness cannot defeat meanness. But niceness can. Go out of your way to be nice to other people, and you may be pleasantly suprised to discover two things: 1. some of the mean people will stop being mean. 2. alot of people who said nothing before will open up to you and be nice to you.

This advice I am giving is very difficult advice to take, but it is also advice that if taken, could change your whole school experience, as well as many other people's.

I'm sorry you have to go through what you are going through in the first place; I went through the same thing. Be assured that after I graduated, I never had to experience anything like that again, but I still have nightmares about it.

However, as time goes by the nightmares are becoming fewer and fewer.

Hang in there!

SoF
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:iconiokothepanda:
IokoThePanda Dec 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
oh, Iīll try my best with your advise :D
thank you for spending your time <3
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:iconshintai88:
Shintai88 Dec 17, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Making Internet friends help, Since people can feel a bond with a person they are talking to. And trust can be developed.
However though I have not been in your situation. I can say alot of people don't actually care what a person looks like. Atleast not until they start talking to others who decide to ask.

Try going out by yourself to events that no one you know goes to. And try and see if you can meet some new people. Unfortunately school. is a place where you have some tribal bullcrap going on. So even if someone wants to be friends with you, they won't because they don't want to risk their rep or whatever.

Going out and meeting new people, Starting a conversation with the person in the queue with you, is a way to build up self confidence, You might even end up being friends, who then meet up to go to events together.
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:iconiokothepanda:
IokoThePanda Dec 17, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
yah, a really good tipp C:
but in my town arenīt much eventīs...
And I donīt like going out alone, the I feel a little bit lost... :S
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:iconshintai88:
Shintai88 Dec 17, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Ahhhh i see. I used to be like that aswell not wanting to go out. Was pretty much a recluse for 5 years but not because I was afriad of being alone but more like I had nothing to do out there. Till I decided I need to change my life. Guess the difference is I was in a city, So I could find events to go to.

Don't feel down cause your short, I find short to be attractive for women. Since they are the right height for hugs.
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:iconiokothepanda:
IokoThePanda Dec 17, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol, yah, I think Iīm looking for something I can go to C:
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