I've been used to being single a majority of the time, but nothing is better than being with someone that is truly special. You may say that you're fine, but deep down I'm sure you're wishing for the right person to come along too.
I am, but I'm not that concerned over it. Although, from your perspective, you've experienced what it's like to be with someone, and I haven't. You can miss being in a relationship, and I can't. So I really can't say anything on the matter
The moment you stop looking for a boyfriend it appears. OK, not always, but if you are too eager they perceive it and yo appear as needy. The worst thing a person can do is looking like is begging for love.
It happened to me before. Now, that I am comfortable with myself and ignore them, guys approach me more. I just have became lazy for relationships, or I like the one who is shy and too scared to date anybody.
I'll tell you what you are doing wrong! You're too focused on being in a relationship! You're too focused on the whys!
Things just happen. Most relationships don't work out, even when people like each other enough to get married. Go out with your girl friends, have a few drinks if you're of age, and try asking someone out yourself. Don't worry if he says no, don't assume he's your soul mate if he says yes, and DO NOT be afraid to dump HIM if you just aren't feeling it.
Accept this: You're simply not going to click with just anybody. As long as you concentrate on improving yourself with what benefits you, not with regards to what you think will get you a boyfriend, it will be fine. It will work itself out as long as you have an active social circle, preferably with different types of people.
This is actually the problem for a lot of people. They let themselves be put down by the fact that they can't make anybody dig them - which is simply ridiculous . Considering how many people there are, you're just going through a very small sample. Especially if these samples are taken from a homogenic group of people, aka same friend-circle.
You can't keep wanting to be in a relationship. The right one will come when they're ready. : ) Love isn't something that should be pushed. If it makes you feel better I've never been in a relationship or ever been asked out XD And no one ever complements me saying you're pretty, smart, or other stuff like that.
Hmm... Were your former boyfriends similar to each other? Maybe all of them have a certain issue that keeps them from staying in a relationship so maybe it's not mainly because of you. It could also be that they just weren't mature enough yet. Or maybe you didn't have enough in common?
Still it is good to reflect on your own actions. Maybe a certain habbit of yours has been irritating them. It's difficult since they didn't want to tell you.
I think that for a long relationship it is necessary that you can communicate well. So the partner needs to be ready to answer such uncomfortable questions like problems they have with you as well.
(I never used "maybe" so often before I guess... ='D)
Be more proactive. Most guys are shy and just as scared of rejection as you are; why should they take all the risk? Become more confident and more effective at conveying romantic interest. Don't flirt with every boy you see, but if you like one you have to show it. Not many guys (unless they're really drunk and/or horny) will bother with a girl that doesn't seem to be looking for a relationship and that's not exactly surprising.
But yeah, become more confident. A year of being single is not the end of the world and it makes you seem slightly desperate that you're so worried about it. People can sense desperation and generally avoid it.
maybe guys don't realize you are interested in them romantically. maybe you should try flirting more idk XDD i don't mean dressing in tight/revealing clothes, i mean just act more cutesy and girly and playful, so that guys see you as flirting instead of being just another friend who casually hangs out with them.
i guess those guys who dumped you were afraid to hurt your feelings. well they should have been more honest with you. but also, you might want to think back on those relationships and see if there were any warning signs that things weren't going well. then hopefully you can avoid those things in your next relationship.
I've been single my whole life and i still am and im 22. So i kinda fail to see the problem here? 1 year isn't long at all. Just means your having a dry spell and not many guys are currently interested in talking to you. Maybe you have too much time on your hands to think/contemplate about these things and could use that time doing something productive? <--- honest thoughts since you want honesty and what not.
I think if you just took it easy and stopped stressing about it and went out and had fun things would fall in place. Most of the girls i would approach or try to talk to are girls who give me attention here and there and don't force me to do all the work. But then again, i've been single for 22 years. What the hell do i know
i don't really approach anyone to date -___- (and it's extremely rare that someone approaches me, it hasn't happened in years.)
aww i am sorry you had to deal with those tough problems. i don't have any tough situations like that but... i guess i just never cared about being in a relationship.
for finding a good relationship, everyone has a different time that's right for them. so ours will come when the time is right, we just happened to take longer than most other people and that's okay. ^__^
yea pretty much. My psychiatrist tells me that there are people who cant live their life without being in a relationship. He also says that people who are in relationships usually can't handle their own emotional stress by them self. He basically gave me praise for being able to be single so long saying most people can't do it.
haha, well i think the explanation for that is simple- there are other great relationships like family and friends. and also, favorite hobbies. for me, it's drawing, which i am very passionate about. so there are other good things in my life now that i channel my emotion into, and that's why i don't feel the need to be in a relationship.
sometimes i do wish i had a BF though
but then i remember that it will happen when the time is right and there's no need to be upset about being single for a long time.
but don't forget you gotta put yourself out there and enjoy life while you still can! Go out and meet guys dont judge or anything just meet new people. Pretty soon we will get at an age where we are all busy with our careers and this won't be as much of a luxury as it is now.
Maybe because of that very out look of wanting to improve yourself because you think you're doing something wrong. What's wrong with just being who you are? Don't get me wrong self-improvement is a great thing, but for those reasons no, it's terrible. The fact that you feel like there is something wrong with "you" that needs to be changed is the thing that is wrong, and it comes out subconsciously, and other people can pick up on that, and it turns people away. It's the fact that you are looking for something to be wrong with you rather than being happy with who you are and realizing that it's better to be loved for who you are, not change to fit into a relationship.
Which is why you think that "It's not you, it's me" is bullshit. In reality that's about as straight forward and honest an answer as it gets. It means there isn't anything wrong with you, you're just not the one. You're not doing anything wrong in a relationship, so stop looking for a reason to put the blame on yourself. Is that really what you want? If anything the only thing you're doing wrong is trying to find something wrong with yourself.
So don't do anything to change yourself just to get a date, trust me, that never ends up good. Self-improvement is fine as long as it's for the right reasons, and it's something that you yourself honestly want because of you and nothing else.
Everyone has flaws, no one is perfect. I'll give you an example. Right now I am in love with an amazing woman, but shes got some really major flaws. Flaws that in other people, only added to my disattraction. Yet in her, I see nothing wrong, and I never want her to change. For some weird reason it's a combination of everything, even those flaws that make me love her. If she didn't have those flaws I wouldn't love her like I do.
The best way to make sure that someone loves you for you is to always be yourself. If you are, it won't just drop out of the sky, but eventually you'll find something that fits you perfectly.
the problem is that I am a little awkward when it comes to flirting.
Then you should learn to be more aggressive. I'm pretty awkward at the subtlety stuff too, so if I meet a guy that I'm into and I don't necessarily see him as my future husband, I'll skip the subtlety and manipulation and be much more up front about what I want without playing games. Unfortunately those guys are never going to take you seriously so you won't find a relationship that way; it's the bullshit games that guys get hooked on and that's what makes them like a girl. But you'll have a little more confidence in yourself if you know that your lack of success isn't because you're completely undesirable, which will either make guys more attracted to you, and/or make you like yourself better regardless (which frankly is more important since there's no one you'll ever spend as much time with as yourself).
Don't think of it as a permanent strategy, but as an exercise.