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December 2, 2012


Replies: 6

My group members misunderstood me, should i try to explain myself again?

marokji Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
so me and my 4 classmates were supposed to present our powerpoint together last week, but i couldn't come because of some personal business. So I texted them the night before saying that i'm not coming, and they said "ok".

So the next day, igot an email from my professor, he told me that my group has kicked me out because i was slacking off and unreliable. I got angry because despite not coming on that day, i still did my work and everything. It wasn't like I was sitting around doing nothing. So i called the group leader and asked him why he said that. And he said that i never showed up to group meetings and he could never get a hold of me because i never replied to his text.

So i told him that i didn't hear about any group meetings from anyone, and i never received his texts. And i asked him why didn't he call me when i didn't reply to his text, especially something as important as a group meeting. He said that he just thought i wast trying to slack off and didn't bother calling me.

SO i explained to him that i've never gotten any texts, and i also called the other group members to explain it to them. They said it was fine. So next week, i have to do the whole presentation again all by myself because they've already kicked me out and presented their parts.

Should i explain myself one more time when i see them next week? Although they said that it was fine, i feel like they just said that so i wouldn't bother them anymore. What do you think?

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Devious Comments

Mercury-Crowe Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Professional Artisan Crafter
Eh, this is one of those real-world situations that is infuriating but unfortunately happens sometimes.

If you've already explained yourself, then that's all you need to do. And present the stuff, of course. Don't keep trying to get forgiveness from them.

Think about it like this, try putting the shoe on the other foot. You have a project and someone just doesn't show up. You don't know WHY (or maybe you DO)but the fact of the matter is, they are not there.

If you don't show up to work, you get fired. Regardless of the reason. That's pretty much what happened here.

Next time you get involved in a project, make SURE you all have contact info AND make sure you have a schedule for said contact- the person in charge of that should send out a (text/email) by (day/time)- if you don't get a message then you know something is fishy and you can contact them and make sure you aren't being accidentally left out.
marokji Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
thanks, that sounds like a good idea. I just didn't want them to think that i was lazy. And i mean if i text someone and they never replied then i would callthem, it's just common sense. But still.this sucks though.
siantjudas Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012   Digital Artist
The situation is already resolved, you present by yourself as opposed to taking a zero for the presentation, you should be glad about that. Move on and stop dragging it out.
Svataben Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
- You sent a little text the night before, explaining nothing. They had no idea how much you'd been doing.
- You did fail to show, good reason or not.
- It also sounds like it's not the first time you've missed meetings.

Don't bother explaining again.

I've been on the other side - been part of a group where one member doesn't take part.
They probably feel like I felt: Just wanting the thing over, and contact with the let-down to be minimal.
It's hard enough to do the required work, and having someone unstable in the group makes the whole thing extra stressful. They probably just want to put he thing behind them, and never be in a group with you again.

Leave them be. No explanation can change what happened anyway.
marokji Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
- no i did explain that my mom was really sick and i need to stay home to keep an eye on her and apologized to them all.
- well yeah
- It's not, because i've never heard about any group meetings that they were having, they just sent me text messages saying they were meeting at such and such. And i don'tknow why, but i never received ANY of those text. And they didn't even try to confront me when i was in class, they justkept quite about it. So i didn't know they were having trouble getting a hold of me
marokji Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
arg seriously, i thought it was weird that everyone in the group was so chill (no group meetings, no rehearsal, no nothing). I didn't know they were thinking bad of me and just assumed that i was lazy.
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