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November 24, 2012
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How do you fall in love?

:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012
When you're terrified of anyone getting close to you, because you feel defenseless against any harm?
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Devious Comments

:iconapatheticbunny:
ApAtHeTIcBuNnY Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Being alone is not a bad thing. People will disappoint you eventually, save yourself the heartbreak.

Make lots of friends, though. Or do what I do, and sell your soul to the internet.

The internet has cats.

Just saying.
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:iconmitchialia:
Mitchialia Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
Simple most of it happens unexpectantly and naturally-> Form bonds of trust with people such as a friend-> listen to your natural sense of attraction when you feel you're starting to like or become attracted to someone and they start giving you signs back -> take risks and go on that date if they ask you out or ask yourself, the worst they can say is no, if that's the case you can still be friends or try again with someone else. When you're hitting it off and falling for someone trust me, you'll feel it. Do what it tells you too even if it can be a little scary.
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:iconhappysnapper74:
HappySnapper74 Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
You take the risk...
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:iconsolum-ipsum:
Solum-Ipsum Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconpylonsplz: YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS!!
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
HA! Good one :D
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:iconsolum-ipsum:
Solum-Ipsum Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
But seriously, gather guts, build defenses. Not that I'm any better, though. =P
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:iconmew-sumomo:
Mew-Sumomo Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Student General Artist
You pay a one-time fee of $75.
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:iconworldhero:
WorldHero Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Student Filmographer
You don't look for it. Have it look for you. :meow: It'll show up when you least expect it.

I was never looking to fall in love with anyone, yet 2 years ago, I met one boy on here that just happened to share the same interests as I did and we hit it off really well for a few months before he asked me out. :shrug: And since then, we're still together. c:
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
Good to hear your story, thanks for sharing!
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:iconworldhero:
WorldHero Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Student Filmographer
No problem. Sorry if it wasn't much help. ^^;
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:iconlexi247:
Lexi247 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
It comes with time, and the steady build of a relationship of a sort :) At least that is what I think
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
That would need time and careful attention...
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:iconlexi247:
Lexi247 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
Careful attention? I disagree :) It happens naturally usually.
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:iconpmmurphy:
PMMurphy Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Some people doubt if love even really exists. Its such a strong word.

It's one of those things that just kinda hit you without expecting it.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
I'm a doubter... need to paint a target on my chest, lol!
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:iconpmmurphy:
PMMurphy Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Its fine to be a doubter. All you gotta do is go out and talk to people. Hold conversations and try to have fun. You can leave your privacy walls up if you want to it doesn't matter. Sooner or later you will run into someone you feel comfortable around to let those walls down.

Then maybe they feel the same with you.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
I hope so too :) Thanks for encouraging me...
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:iconpmmurphy:
PMMurphy Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i just described dating to you. Thats all i did. Everyone has their own walls they keep up to protect them self from harm.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
Lol! I think living in a hard place like NYC makes those wall taller and colder... :(
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:iconpmmurphy:
PMMurphy Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
dont think that. Everyone has their own shit to deal with just in different places and at different levels.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012
okay :)
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:iconfuyuko7:
Fuyuko7 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
It just happens...when you let your guard down :paranoid:
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
0o0! I need to sack my battalion of guards then :P
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:iconfuyuko7:
Fuyuko7 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
:lol:

I choose to guard my emotions
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:iconcynicalpsychic:
CynicalPsychic Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Student General Artist
You let go and just let yourself live :)
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
I can do that, after taking a swig or two of JD!
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:iconcynicalpsychic:
CynicalPsychic Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Student General Artist
Then drink more JD! =P
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
CHEERS!
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:iconcakeroll:
cakeroll Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
I fall in love when I don't need to. ^^;
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:icontai-korczak:
Tai-Korczak Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I'm always cautious at first. I mean right now there is this is one girl in my class who is amazing in personality and looks and I can't help but to feel all warm inside. But I'm being careful because I'm helping her try to hook up with my friend Adam. It doesn't bother me because I get that feeling all the time.
Falling in love is confusing for me because it can come form anywhere. Like I said before I'm cautious with love. Its either just a crush or a really close friendship.
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:iconjessicaann87:
JessicaAnn87 Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
when you feel it you feel it. You need to surrender yourself. if you're terrified of getting close then you can never surrender yourself fully to someone.
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:iconwilliamrobertrussell:
WilliamRobertRussell Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
when starting a relationship with a person you are beginning to find interest in, TALK. do not get physically involved with the person at all. Learn about each other, show that you are genuinely interested in the person's life, and their stories, and their philosophy. when you show a person that you are interested in THEM and not their appearance, you will begin to form something that most relationships lack, trust. trust is the key to love. if you do not trust the person, you cannot love them. when you both come to a sense of trust in one another, you will be more easily capable of discussing moving into the realm of physical relation.

This is just a little of MY philosophy of starting a relationship with ANYONE in fact. Some people you will find that you will only be friends because of your differences, and eventually you will come across someone you may find a loving relationship with.
Also, remember to keep an open mind, and have the capability to empathize. free your mind of judgement.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Sometimes I feel like it's the LACK of judgement that's keeping me from forming relationship with quite a lot of people. They want to hear opinions, judgement, maybe criticism, so they know where I stand, and whether or not I stand with them.

I've have a long time of training NOT to judge, and look for what's good or a lesson to learn in what life drops my way. And that's been a real conversation killer with people, when they find I don't stand anywhere, or anywhere near their stands, or that I just stand way out there elsewhere... .
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:iconwilliamrobertrussell:
WilliamRobertRussell Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I find that being that far out (which i am too) allows me to have many conversations with others on the reasoning behind what they believe. Eventually you will find someone who may be out there too, but you will always have your differences with someone. which is a good thing, because that just keeps the dialogue and learning conversations going. You just need to find someone who is accepting of your differences.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
I'll have to have some more faith in myself out there in the open, and keep eyes open then... :)
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:iconfuyuko7:
Fuyuko7 Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I've never dated anyone.
And I'm not even interested in being in a relationship.
As I don't believe that love/marriage will bring me happiness.
I don't wish to repeat my life, so I prefer to be single, away from the stress; and have a more happy adulthood than my childhood.
And free :)
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
I used to believe that, now I'm not so sure. I would like to have someone who'll get my back when I'm real down...
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:iconfuyuko7:
Fuyuko7 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
Guess so.....if only you could tell whether a person is good or not....
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:iconsomedaysakuhin:
SomedaySakuhin Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2012  Professional General Artist
Oh well... It's difficult.
At some point after being rejected by a few people I had a crush on I didn't really care anymore whether the next time it would work out or not. I bitterly accepted the thought of never getting someone but I tried anyway.
To my big surprise my boyfriend was the one who fell in love with me first, gave me slight signals but was too shy to do much. ^^'
So I thought: "Gosh, I don't want to wait all my life with this!" and did all that was necessary to get closer.

No guts, no glory?
Think about what can really happen if it doesn't work out:
Will the other one follow and annoy you all your life for it?
Will they hurt you physically?
Will they kill you?

Hopefully not. What you are getting eitherway is an experience and if you think about that you might change it for the better. Eventually you can turn into the one that you need to become for the one who is meant to you.

Well, at least that's my approach. Hope it helps...
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
"No guts no glory" Haha, I like that! Hopefully I'll be able to keep that in mind more and more often when meeting people :) Thank you...
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:iconsomedaysakuhin:
SomedaySakuhin Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Professional General Artist
You're welcome, very glad if it helps. :3
Go for it~
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:iconfalconstrife86:
falconstrife86 Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2012
It comes with time. I was cynical for years and wanted nothing to do with relationships. I ran into an old school mate at a party one night and thought "This is someone I want to know." I don't know why, and I have no clue when I realized I love him, but today we're happily married. The key thing to remember is that even if you don't realize it, it will happen when you're ready, so don't force it. :)
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2012
Thanks! I'm glad to hear your story. Gives hope, y'know? :)
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:iconzero587:
Zero587 Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2012
All i know, is that it will come when the time is right.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2012
Time's a-flying away from me man... I'm almost 30.
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:iconzero587:
Zero587 Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2012
Well, let me just say i know how you feel. Im 22. And ive never been on a date in my life before. Maybe its just because i like being alone, or simply because iam just waiting for someone to find me. But...love cant wait sometimes since you have to go out and find it. Id rather wait then to find. Because if i find then i simply can not tell myself that its what i need because i dont at the moment. But maybe someone will be interested in me, or maybe they simply will not. I guess it all depends on the times or rather the person in which they seek out to love.

Love though, for me...i havent the slightest clue as to know what it'll ever feel like because i will never know... :(
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2012
Keep having faith! I'm not really any closer at solving this than before, but I wish us both luck...
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:iconzero587:
Zero587 Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2012
True. And its not something that I need right now anyways...
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:iconcassiuseos:
Cassiuseos Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
I still haven't gotten over that, a fear of abandonment. Sometimes I wish it would end so I do not have to wait for it to come, always fearing and dreading it. I do not really believe in other people not to getting going when the going gets tough, as the saying goes. I feel bad about my lack of faith but I have few role models of perseverance and love rather than lust, and then there is people staying together out of convenience or a fear of change.
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:iconysliao:
YSLiao Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2012
I share your lack of role models. Had a couple, and they both self-destructed in front of me when vanity and greed got the better of them. Made me real cynical about people and didn't want connection for years. Trying to fix that now. A variant of fear of abandonment for me, it's more like fear of nobody out there will get my back when shit happened.
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