Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login

Details

Closed to new replies
November 22, 2012
Link

Statistics

Replies: 129

self harm, depression stuff and its not just me

:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012
i dont know what to do
my sister always wears long sleeve shirts and i didnt think that she cut until i felt them while grabbing onto her sleeve, i really want to help her but i dont know she wont talk to me about it in any way and it makes me so worried, i want her to be more open about her feelings so i can at least try to help but.
really though me and my sister are pretty close and she really never talks about her feelings and i want her to, i want her to know that she wouldnt look like some attention whore if she said anything about her feelings and yes, it would worry people, but theyre just there to help and its better whenever you do get better.
and my other friend, i want her to stop saying shes fat and worthless when shes not, shes actually really skinny and underweight and she needs to gain weight and she knows that and i dont know whats happening because she says that shes skinny and then she says that shes fat and shes also really picky about foods, not in calories but in taste and. uhg and she always talks about how little she eats when everyone else eats that much too and she just takes in less calories than everyone else.
and then heres me being a terrible friend and ranting over the internet but i just want to help them and i cant change their thinking path but i can try to help them but my sister wont open up and im just kind of frustrated. i thought i was doing really good this month by not cutting at all but i just feel like i need to because i cant handle this and i dont have any more pills. i really dont want to and i just wish there was someone that would listen to me and tell me its okay. im just seriously lost please dont make things any worse, i just want attention to get help when i cant get it anywhere else. since my parents treat this kind of thing as a joke and i can never tell them how i really feel its just so aggravating and i almost cant take it. i want to stay strong i really do.
Reply

You can no longer comment on this thread as it was closed due to no activity for a month.

Devious Comments

:icondjdanilly:
djdanilly Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2012  Professional General Artist
contact me, my hours are 9am to 6pm.
Reply
:iconworkoutprogress:
workoutprogress Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012   Photographer
Hug her.

Hug the shit out of her.

Hug her TO DEATH.

And then figure out what's really bothering her (not just what she says) and make her face it.

Good luck.
Reply
:iconjericawinters:
JericaWinters Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012
You're not a terrible friend. I'm sure you've done all you can to help them change their destructive thinking. But, it's really hard to change people that don't want to listen or be changed. The parents in both cases need to be involved...it is pretty sick if they are treating it like a joke. Maybe a school councellor could help them (but getting them to see a councellor sounds like it wouldn't work). The most you can do is hang out with them and do activities that are fun, this will get their minds off their problems at least for a little while, and maybe it can become a habit for them to seek out fun stuff.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
yeahyehah i think im throwing a party next weekend??? i guess that will help!!
Reply
:iconjericawinters:
JericaWinters Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
A party? Sounds like fun!
:cake::party::cake::party::cake::party::cake::party::cake:
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
it is!!! I'm co-hosting so this will be fun
Reply
:iconthemarcher:
TheMarcher Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
It is very hard to share feeling about self harm to people who are so close.
It might be a better idea to have your sister talk to someone else. Perhaps not a doctor but just a friend.

I know I could never have told my mom or my sister about what I felt back in the days when I self harmed. But I could talk about it with strangers. I did not feel the need to keep a facade when I did not know the person well.

And you are strong, you can be strong enough to face anything. Even if it does not feel like it you are always able to take another step. Just one at the time, and then you take one more and repeat until you are done.
And you don't have to do it alone. There is plenty of good people who can help!
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
wowow thank you so much, im saving this comment in my folder so i can look back on it thanks! omg i dont know what to say really
Reply
:iconharleykitten342:
harleykitten342 Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2012  Hobbyist
wait,,,, so u cut urself too???
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
used to??
Reply
:iconharleykitten342:
harleykitten342 Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist
ohhhhh ok...i hope everything works out for you. i apologize for my lack of advice :(
Reply
:iconlimitless--wings:
limitless--wings Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
well.. personally speaking, i have never cut myself, but i have self-harmed with other objects. Your sister needs you the most at a time like this. it does not matter, if she keeps on telling you to go away, because there's a Swedish Proverb, that pretty much describes it all. 'Love me, when I don't deserve it, because that's when I need it the most' :)
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
omgomg thank you!! this really helps a lot i dont know how to describe it but thansk
Reply
:iconxtoribird:
xToriBird Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yeah I learned all this in Health class.

For your sister, she has depression. Cutting herself is one thing that she thinks will solve her problem, but obviously, it won't. And I don't know if she's experiencing the later symptoms: depression leads to overdosing and going on drugs and alcohol. It can then lead to suicide. Tell your parents or teachers she trust, and they'll help. Remember, depression IS curable.

For your friend, she has a mental eating disorder, and I think it's bulimia, or something else. Anyway yeah she's like other girls: thinking she's fat when she's not, blah blah blah. But her view is seriously affecting her. She can starve herself, and that's all I know about bulimia. Google it or something.....lol

But the best you can do for both of them is to tell an adult you trust and/or they trust. I'm sorry you're experiencing this; it must be hard for you.

But remember that both cases ARE curable. Oh and DO NOT say things like "it'll be alright" "you're not fat" "get over it". It won't help at all. Kay, that's all I have to say :)
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
i try to tell her that but she just ignores me so i just hug her when shes sad

my friend does not have an eating disorder, she has a medical condition with her metabolism or whatever and doesnt take in calories
Reply
:iconxtoribird:
xToriBird Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
and yeah if she ignores you, don't try to make her feel better with words. I'm not saying this to be mean or anything, but if she doesn't want to talk about it, then don't talk about it. It's her choice, and talking about it will make her feel worse. Hugging her is a good thing, it lets her know there's someone who still loves and cares about her.
Reply
:iconxtoribird:
xToriBird Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
ah I see. for the metabolism, do doctors try to help her?

and did you ever tell your parents about these situations?
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
possibly
Reply
:iconshaduf:
shaduf Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Student General Artist
I'm not sure I can be very much help... I have never cut, but I have felt very depressed and had thoughts of maybe not suicide, but simply wishing to be dead. It's really hard for me to share my feelings because I feel I am being too selfish about life. I have a roof over my head, a loving family, adorable pets. So when I feel depressed I feel like I'm just a burden and being unreasonable and sometimes I am just embarrassed. I know not everyone is the same but it might be issues like this why your sister does not want to open up. It seems like you really care about your sister and your friend, and it is right to be concerned if they are living unhealthily or unhappily, so just ignore some people who may have posted otherwise. I think if you shared your own feelings perhaps your sister would feel more comfortable opening up about her feelings. Tell her how you feel, how you just want to help but feel helpless. I would do the same with your friend, if she feels your genuine concern she may realize her self-image needs some help and be willing to work on it. I don't know if you might have tried that, but it is my only idea :/ I wish you success and I hope your life and those close to you can become happier. It's better to have hope and try to make a positive change then to despair.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
yeah i feel like you a lot??
Reply
:iconryuzakipwnskira:
ryuzakipwnskira Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2012
i dont know exactly how to help but theres always an end to depression in ends soon enough and then you can be happy again you just need to really examine whats going on. i just got over a 3 year long depression. as for your sister i just have one suggestion next time shes sad dont say anything just hug her. some people just dont want to talk about whats bothering them either cause they think others wont understand or that it wont really help. she may just need to think things out thats how i got over my depression. and as for you, you need to relax cutting is never the answer. youll find someone who loves you if its not now you will eventually. i hope this helped if not im sorry
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
D:
Reply
:iconryuzakipwnskira:
ryuzakipwnskira Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012
yeah well time heals most wounds
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012
yup!
Reply
:iconryuzakipwnskira:
ryuzakipwnskira Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2012
uh huh
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
well I haven't cut, but I came close to it. So as someone who shares her feelings I might bring a little insight on it to you. well sometimes she might feel like a burden if she talks about her feeling either that or she wants to talks but she doesn't want to bring up the topic. So how about trying going to her instead her going to you. Also do NOT i repeat DO NOT go to a therapist! They just shout a bunch of negative stuff at us and it only makes us feel really bad. hopes this helps.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
thanks!!
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
ur welcome!^^
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
aaa omg but youre actually a big help???? im soryr if i didnt clarify that
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012   Digital Artist
First, learn to type normally, it makes things easier to read when you actually capitalize the beginning of sentences and use paragraph breaks to separate ideas.

Second, isn't it quite hypocritical of you to not want your sister to cut when you yourself do it, or have done it? Honestly, I don't know where you get off complaining about how she handles things when you do the same exact thing. If you don't want her to do that and want her to open up more to you, then lead by example and do so yourself.

Third, I would say something about your friend, but my eyes can't focus enough to bring that part out of your text wall, again back to learning to type in a way that is easy to read.

And fourth, yes you are being a terrible friend, and not just because you're ranting about them over the internet, but because you want to change your friend and sister. You think you know better than them, but you can't even get a grip on your own life. How the hell do you expect to help anyone when you can't even help yourself. Let them be with who they are and stop trying to change their way of thinking. They have every right to feel however they want, and you of all people have absolutely no right to judge them at all. If you want to do some good then focus on getting a grip on your own life.
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
UR A TOTAL JERK!!!
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012   Digital Artist
Go white knight somewhere else stalker.
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
im not a stalker!!! I was checking out the fourms and then i saw ur jerk comment!
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012   Digital Artist
Please tell me that jerk isn't the only insult that you know.
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh I know more but I perfer to not use that language.
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012   Digital Artist
Why? Are you like some kind of religious zealot who can't fucking swear?
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
No! I just choose not to! It's a life style that YOU would never understand!
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012
im sorry
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
don't listen to this guy!!! he is a total J-E-R-K!!!!!!
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
omG yeah hes so much like tumblr user commuinismkills except maybe stupider
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL!!! Really?
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
yeah!! like a huge grammar nazi but doesnt use good grammar himself more like fuCK
Reply
:icontoshiro12:
toshiro12 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
OMG!!! that is so unreasonable!!! He sounds like a total jerk and a moron.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
pretty much!!! ive stopped actually listening to him and im just pisding him off at this point
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012   Digital Artist
You should be sorry to your sister for being a hypocrite, and trivializing her feelings.

But seriously, can you be assed to actually capitalize and use fucking punctuation like an educated individual, because besides the fact that it makes reading easier, when you fail to do so, it makes you look like unintelligent, which means people are less likely to take anything you say seriously.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012
says someone who drags their whole sentence with unneeded commas instead of using periods. i use the right puctuations except for captilization and sometimes spelling. but really, your commas everywhere is getting really hard to read because you dont know when to stop thinking, its like your mind is out of breath. i do capitilize and use apostrophes on my computer though.
also, ive said nothing to my sister about self-mutilation. like i said, i wanted to help her, not change her. i know that to change someone, you have to make an impact big enough on their live for them to change themselves. i also know that self-harm comes out of a few things; stress, anger, and depression. the most obvious way to stop self-harming is to eliminate the factors, which cannot be done all at once and must be done is small steps.
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012   Digital Artist
Either way, you set a bad example for her, and are really hypocritical to judge her for doing so when you can't even get a grip yourself.

And giving me this shit about eliminating all the factors and doing it in small steps is just a fancy way of saying you're too lazy to actually do something about it. Honestly since admittedly you're still haven't fully stepped away from that life, you have no right to say what can or can't stop it.

Also, "i use the right puctuations". Besides the fact that it's punctuation not puctuations, I don't think you know where the apostrophe is. And for someone that begins their entire point by criticizing the use of commas you sure did use a lot of them.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2012
Wow, real adult, snaps for you.
I use commas in the right places, it's a break in a sentence for a new thought. This, is what you were, doing because, it seemed like this.
Enough about grammar though, I don't want to deal with some idiot that picks fights with kids over the internet. Even better, picking fights with kids over the internet in a "Help with Life" forum.
Way to set a good example for adults, you deserve a medal.
Reply
:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012   Digital Artist
My advice before you got defensive still holds. You came to help with life, I gave advice, you got defensive.
Reply
:iconxwnd:
xwnd Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2012
Telling me that I'm a terrible person is great advice, thanks.
Reply
(1 Reply)
Add a Comment: