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November 11, 2012


Replies: 65

Telling my parents about boyxboy pairings

Schplitzkriegs Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I need help with something that's been bothering me since September.

Ever since I got into Hetalia, I've wanted to draw the pairings, most of which are boy x boy. My parents are homophobic (more particularly my mom) and monitor my account once in a while. I have to explain these pairings to them because:

1. I'm not allowed to hide things from them or have secrets

2. My parents will check my account one of these days, and I don't want them to flip out and/or punish me, because they noticed I was posting boy x boy pairings (which I haven't yet).

My dad isn't too homophobic, but he just agreed with my mom on voting no to a question about gay marriage. I don't know his real opinion on the situation, but the good news is, the question passed in my state.

I'm not gay, but I LOVE boy x boy pairings. And what I'm looking at is shounen-ai, NOT yaoi. But I don't know whether my parents would find the pairings cute.

So this is how my mom's homophobia started. One time she was watching a movie, she saw 2 men kiss, and she was like "eww how disgusting". A few months later, I heard her say something that was against gay marriage, and I asked her if she was homophobic of not. She gave me a long lecture using the religious BS people have come up with as excuses.

It goes earlier than this. Sometime last year, my mom was like "I hope you're not drawing gay cartoons!" I wasn't too big for boy x boy pairings at the time, so I didn't care that much about her opinion back then.

I need help with this situation because I want to draw these pairings BADLY.

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Devious Comments

shogun3540 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Professional Artist
start pasting your drawings on the fridge like when you're a little kid, just throw a wrench into the wheel and watch her flip the fuck out for fun
Multifire Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Explain to them that they are just drawings. I mean Jesus, why do they care about the rights and "sins" of people that don't even exist?
Schplitzkriegs Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I know right? Like, on their terms boy x girl is acceptable while boy x boy is inappropriate. It's not like I'm pairing up real people. Since they're just anime/cartoons, they probably won't look as "disgusting" as it would in real life (not that I consider it disgusting, my parents do).
FerricPlushy Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
You know my friend was an amateur novelist and I used to read his rough drafts. There was a teenage gay couple in one of the stories but he assured me he wasn't gay. Year later he came out to me, he said he didn't even realize he was gay. If you really love boyxboy you might want to take a good look at yourself. Btw he had girlfriends also.
Schplitzkriegs Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm going to add some additional information today about the topic when I discuss it with my parents. I just want to let them know that this isn't like drugs, nor am I looking at porn and I will NOT become gay because of this. Also two boys kissing is NOT inappropriate. I treat it the same as a boy and a girl kissing, etc.
LadyZelda1 Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012
Lady, get a life.
MR-NIK Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012   Digital Artist
Don't tell them a damn thing about it.

Look, they just don't want you to meet dirty psychotic men on the internet and end up pregnant or dead. This is their main concern.
Your mum has some backwards views as a result of childhood religious programming, its not her fault.
No good will come from sharing this information with them. My dad was pissed out to discover me drawing gory stuff and I'm fucking 31... There's no purpose telling them these things, they're old and out of touch and it's not important.

What you are getting involved in here is nothing to be concerned about. You are drawing some fan art, not sending nude photos of yourself around. They don't need to know. It's your secret.

You from this moment grant yourself permission to keep a secret.
Start a new account on the side and explore your interest to its fullest.
Become a STAR at drawing boy love. Make money from it.

When you hear your parents' bullshit stance on homosexuality, be strong about your opinion. Show your father what it means to exercise individuality by standing your ground. Question everything like she taught you, and if she complains you can tell her that you she taught you to do that and religion/politics and sexuality is not beyond questioning.
RandomRobskii Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012  Student Filmographer
I personally wouldn't tell them anything about it. They won't accept it, so don't try. I'd try to get a secret account and post on there. I don't let my family at my dA, it's my sacred place.
k1k0r0 Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Kids are supposed to have secrets from their parents, it's part of growing up. If you really want to draw this subject that badly, why haven't you already? I used to have a big suitcase full of drawings I didn't want my parents to see, of course this was before a time of constant and easy acces to the internet ;-) I sure as hell didn't show them to anybody. Seems to me the real problem for you is not being able to showcase what you create, which I understand, so get yourself a nice and big digital suitcase ^^ (read: incognito account) and draw to your hearts content. Don't feel guilty about it, you have a right to your privacy and a right to develop your creativity any way you like.
Elmida Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012
In fact, if you want to talk to your parents about male pairings I totally would NOT give shonen ai as an example, nor Hetalia. Those are examples of how homosexuality should not be, it's almost a parody of it. Also, it's a cartoon, parents really aren't going to feel sympathy for a bunch of pixels on a page. Give an example of two normal, every day guys that they could meet on the streets and like.
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