Oh twiddle shit.
I have a distressing decision to make 
I have to confront someone I know very well about something, someone they know has done.
I'm not going to go into any detail about it because I hate sprawling personal crap over the internet (that's why I don't use Twatter, MyPlace or FriendFace and the like).
Would you go ahead and confront this person if it was you? Even if it would hurt them... but they NEED to know. How would you go about confronting someone with upsetting information?
I'm 22, lol, and I STILL have to figure this shit out! I can't stand being in this position because I'm usually the one who gets caught in the cross fire, damn it! Stupid people, do stupid fucking things, expect not to get caught and then leave everyone else in shit. What in the name of purple, ass crack is wrong with people?
Thing Is I HAVE to tell this person, It can't be avoided...Oh, balls. I think I'll just go find a nice comfy rock to die under!
I have to confront someone I know very well about something, someone they know has done.
I'm not going to go into any detail about it because I hate sprawling personal crap over the internet (that's why I don't use Twatter, MyPlace or FriendFace and the like).
Would you go ahead and confront this person if it was you? Even if it would hurt them... but they NEED to know. How would you go about confronting someone with upsetting information?
I'm 22, lol, and I STILL have to figure this shit out! I can't stand being in this position because I'm usually the one who gets caught in the cross fire, damn it! Stupid people, do stupid fucking things, expect not to get caught and then leave everyone else in shit. What in the name of purple, ass crack is wrong with people?
Thing Is I HAVE to tell this person, It can't be avoided...Oh, balls. I think I'll just go find a nice comfy rock to die under!
Comments16
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What a person needs to know, is really quite subjective. You may think that they need to know, but that's from your perspective, and depending on how close the situation is to you, will determine how big the blinders are that are clouding your vision.
I can't really be less vague, considering your equation is missing almost every single variable. But here's some food for thought, if you can't explain a situation to strangers on the internet who really could care less and aren't going to judge, then maybe whatever situation you're talking about, you're not entirely ready to deal with. If you can't be direct and honest about it in what is essentially a safe and anonymous place, I don't think it's going to work out to well.
I can't really be less vague, considering your equation is missing almost every single variable. But here's some food for thought, if you can't explain a situation to strangers on the internet who really could care less and aren't going to judge, then maybe whatever situation you're talking about, you're not entirely ready to deal with. If you can't be direct and honest about it in what is essentially a safe and anonymous place, I don't think it's going to work out to well.
Dress in disguise so they don't know you're you, there by aleving any anxieties. 
That or tell them in a comforting enviroment. Like a bar.
Or a brotel.
That or tell them in a comforting enviroment. Like a bar.
Or a brotel.
I would tell them... it's a better thing to do in the long run.
Confront them as soon as possible. They may be hurt for a while, but it shouldn't last forever since it's your sister. If you need, have someone there with you. (If they know the situation, and you can trust them.) Either way, you have to tell her sometime. Good luck, and you got this.
Be honest and you'll feel better. If you want a better answer you can always send me a note (I don't mind long notes).
If it is something which could have a huge impact on their life then please tell them. Having them hear from you is better than hearing from someone else or letting it drag on and them getting hurt.
If it is something that someone else has done to them, then it is not for you to take control. If however, it is something that you yourself have done and are ashamed of and sorry for or want to brag about, then yes, go ahead and tell the person so that you can either grow your relationship or destroy it. That's my 51 years of personal experience talking and I still haven't got it right yet. xx
Very often, things people think are their business really aren't.
I had a hard time figuring out what you were talking about, because 'confront' is probably the wrong word here. You'd confront the wrongdoer, not the unknowing victim. Him or her you'd probably just inform. But what makes you believe you're obliged?
I had a hard time figuring out what you were talking about, because 'confront' is probably the wrong word here. You'd confront the wrongdoer, not the unknowing victim. Him or her you'd probably just inform. But what makes you believe you're obliged?
Because the person is my sister. That's why. An yes, Inform would be a better word.
That, perhaps, does put you into a bit of a pickle.
Certainly.
I'm still trying to find a rock big enough to fit my ass underneath.
I'm still trying to find a rock big enough to fit my ass underneath.
You should tell them before it gets worse. Though I suppose it depends on what situation this is. Usually holding things out just makes things worse later on.
Depends on the situation. More details? If you honestly think this is something that the other person needs, you can help them or not. Do you care about that person at all? Are you a coward? Is the sitation any of your business? 
Yes I care and I would say it is my business and No, I am not a coward! I just could do without the hassle at the moment.
Then the decision is pretty easy, isn't it?