Deviant Login Shop  Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour

Details

Closed to new replies
November 5, 2012
Link

Statistics

Replies: 19

please help me.

:iconvoldemorts-butt:
voldemorts-butt Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
Please do not call me an attention whore or anything. Because honestly, I'm seriously getting torn apart. This is what I have to say, and before you call me any form of bitch/whore/loser, walk a mile in my shoes. Yeah, I'm younger than 18. That doesn't mean I'm too inexperienced to know what LOVE is.

- - - - -

Last year, we were the best of friends, he and I. I had the biggest crush on him, and so did every other girl. He had many girlfriends and many girls who crushed on him. I was lucky enough to be one of those few he liked back. I wasÖ one of "those people". The person nobody liked. I donít look good, I donít act good. And he said he loved because I cared about him, and because of my personalityÖ I have a rotten personality, bro. Well, we got really close, then summer came. Weíre a grade apart and he had to go to high school. After that it was all me. I started the conversations. I did everything. And when school started, I said "do not change, I like you just the way you are." and he promised he wouldnít. Well he did and he became a totalÖ I really canít explain it without cursing, but itís bad. Because he wonít text me back now. Heís been avoiding me. And when I see him, he acts really nice. Then I saw him at a football game and he showed me his true colors. For the first time in a long time, he actually insulted me in front of his new friends.



He seems to like his new friends. What does that make me? Old trash?

- - - - -

So I sought out help on another site.

"Absolutely not! You are an awesome person for being you . Donít let a guy, or anyone for that matter, make you think otherwise! If these are his true colors, then lose him. You donít need a jerk like that in your life. There are better boys out there who will treat you right, that you will love more than him. He made a mistake when he decided to insult you."

"Pleas do not think any less of yourself. This is not about you, its about HIM!!! People can change when they go to high school. SO much more is expected of them. Trying to fit in with the "in crowd" can put a lot of pressure on people. Iím sorry you have been hurt by his behaviour! and that he was so cruel in front of his friends. Maybe, its time for you to move on from your friendship with him. sometimes, I believe, some people are only meant to be in our lives for a short period of time. not all friendships last, and as hurtful as it may be now, you will meet other boys and friends, who will hopefully cherish and adore your friendship!"

"People change in high school. Thereís no avoiding it. Everyone except a select few turn into total idiots during high school. Heís lost now, thereís no saving him. No matter how close you were before, heís changed now. Heís not the same as he was before.

Iím sorry. huggles"

- - - - -

And I replied this:

t seems you suggest I forget the guy, but the terrible thing is; I canít. Iíve tried. IÖ reallyÖ canít. He thinks I changed too. Because in between the time this thread and this reply was posted, we had another meeting and he told me something I found inappropriate. I didnít even slap him. It was an instinct. I really didnít mean to. But we were walking with his friends and I backhanded him so hard he swung round and hit the side of the bus. Iíve never hit him before, but when I finally did, I hit him harder than Iíve ever hit him before. Whatís worse than that? I instinctively started yelling at him when he was just sitting there acting all dumbfounded, and I accidentally yelled at him about how I would give up my own life for him (of course, that was two weeks ago) and he didnít say anything. When I met up with him at the bus station (we only get to see each other a couple of minutes per day) he told me he needed to talk andÖ that really didnít sound good. So I told my friends and Brandon was looking kind of nervous. I made him tell me what was up and he ratted out Sarah; apparently she had told Keegan about the suicide attempts. And my parents really donít care about how I feel. They care about my grades. Iím the loser kid of the grade. I dress decently, get decent grades, act decently. People like me! But they donít know anything. Iím actually falling apart because of something I really canít talk about on a public forum because itís REALLY personal. But itís nearly been a year since that event happened, and I really, really miss the loved one I lost. Iím seriously falling apart. I canít keep the smile up much longer.



Just when I thought I was getting better.

- - - - -

But I thought this:

I CAN'T "LOSE THE GUY"! WHY CAN'T YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND THAT?! I TRIED I CAN'T DO IT. I CAN'T!!!
WHY CAN'T I BE A NORMAL PERSON LIKE EVERYONE ELSE? HUH! TELL ME WHY I AM SO HOOKED ONTO YOU. I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING ANYMORE!!!

- - - - -

This was all a couple of weeks ago. On All Hallow's Eve we were hanging out and I pulled him aside to question him. He denied the fact that he ever texted my friend or anything. Then I left. His birthday was a couple of days ago, and in an attempt to patch our friendship back up, I asked him to Winterfest in Missouri in February, and the conversation went like this:

me: Hey.
him: Hey
me: So someone told me it was your birthday.
him: yes it is.
me: I was kidding, I remembered your birthday, and I've been waiting for this for a long time.
me: So I herd u like Skillet
me: Well it just so happens there's a concert in Febrary and I was wondering if I could take you along? C:
him: Really???
me: Yep. I've been saving up for 5 months and Imma buy your tikit

and the conversation was pretty much over after that. Problem is, it's a lot of money to buy an extra ticket and I'm so fucking broke. Now I have to come up with $50 in less that 4 months. And I have to come up with that money off commissions because I don't have a job. I've had commissions open for ages and have never sold one, even though I advertise all the time.

The fuck do I do? I'm so confused about everything! I can't just "forget him" because he and I... we had a truly strong bond. We were BEST friends. He told me that every night. We fought like brother and sister and somehow, we always made up. We did terrible things and we forgave each other for everything. We loved each other and now that we've been separated, we can't talk, and now he's turned into a complete asshole whenever he's around his friends.

I have no damn clue what to do. I get tense whenever I hear his name, I get pissed off whenever someone talks shit on him, and I cry whenever I think about him. Dear God, I need your help. Please help me.
Reply

You can no longer comment on this thread as it was closed due to no activity for a month.

Devious Comments

:iconbabygotback456:
babygotback456 Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2012
remember whatever you decide to do, you've got friends to back you up.

like me i could make a great partner in crime >:D
Reply
:iconvoldemorts-butt:
voldemorts-butt Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
Sarah

...

Are you stalking me
Reply
:iconthestickemperor:
TheStickEmperor Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Professional General Artist
Well, what you do is pick up a weapon and beat the shit out of him with it for treating you like that.

Then again, you're both pussies.
Reply
:iconvoldemorts-butt:
voldemorts-butt Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
AHAHAHA XD

I just might. o_o
Reply
:iconthestickemperor:
TheStickEmperor Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Professional General Artist
Make that bastard wish he had never abandoned you like that.
Reply
:iconglori305:
Glori305 Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012
Well, as you have disregarded the consensus answer from the other site you posted too, it sounds like you want to hear something different?

The problem is, you and he HAVE grown apart. What you are wanting back is the way things were. You can not get back something like that. You had a wonderful relationship, but there have been changes.

And you tried to buy him back with a concert ticket.

He will go with you. And he might even try to have you in his life again out of gratitude. But he has still changed, there will still be problems, and YOU are the one hitting HIM.

Love does not insure a relationship will work. It does not insure a relationship will last, and just because you love someone, does not mean they return the feeling, or have it as strong as you do. And people fall out of love just as often as they fall in love.

You would be better off cutting all ties. Crying about it, eating some ice cream, and finding other friends to go to concerts with. The more you see him, the more you perpetuate the hope that you can go back to the way things were, but you said it yourself, he has changed. You can not have the relationship you had with a different person, and he is now a different person.
Reply
:icondragonflae:
Dragonflae Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012
I couldn't even read this whole thing :stare:

Love doesn't exist. It's a chemical reaction in your brain. You are a bag of meat sitting on a hunk of rock floating in outer space.

Cheers.
Reply
:iconvoldemorts-butt:
voldemorts-butt Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
Eh, the emotion in what I just wrote is pretty much gone now.

I agree, actually. :|
Reply
:icondragonflae:
Dragonflae Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012
Then don't whine.
Reply
:iconthedamagedkey:
TheDamagedKey Featured By Owner Nov 5, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I would like to start by saying that no one is perfect. We all do things at times that when we come back and think about it five - ten years down the road, we're going to look back and think, "Really? Was that me? What on Earth was I thinking?!?"

After reading through what you've written, I think the best thing to do is talk openly and freely about your feelings with him. Somewhere quiet, and just the two of you - if you feel comfortable doing that. You should share with him how you feel, and ask for his honest feelings back. If he doesn't feel the same way about you that you feel about him, or if you feel that he is not being honest with you, then maybe it would be best to remain friends - at least for a while until you two get your lives sorted a bit more. It's better to always have a friend than to have messed that up by pushing for something more that just cannot be(at least at present).

If he's treating you poorly, or, as you put it "showing his true colors", then regardless of how infatuated you are with him, he's just not good for you. Love truly is blind, and I'm not putting you down, I speak from experience. Sometimes you just have to push that aside, and look for something better - and trust me, there are better things out there. Again though, this is something you'll have to talk to him about. I will add, that it's still not particularly nice to hit people - even if they deserve it. ;)

As for the ticket situation, honesty is always, always, always the best policy. That's really all I have to say about that.

I'm not writing you off as being young, but speaking from experience, I can tell you that no matter how much you may love him, if you need to(not necessarily want to), you will be able to forget/move past/just become friends with him. Just remember that you have to do what you have to do, and that your parents and your true friends - even if they seem a bit distant at times - still love and care about you.

I hope this helps you in some way, and I hope you are able to get things sorted out. :hug:
Reply
Add a Comment: