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November 4, 2012
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What do I do?

:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Alright guys, a year ago I created this account to vent about a bad relationship that i was involved in but ended it in January. After I ended the relationship, I was pretty down for the rest of the school year, I had to pick up the scraps left behind from it.

Fast forward to this October (last month) and my life is good. I have strong friendships, new opportunities with girls, and my grades skyrocketed. A couple weeks ago, a friend of my ex-girlfriend decides to tell me that my ex girlfriend still has STRONG feelings for me. Hearing this, all the feelings that I felt for her last year came flooding back. After a long time of consideration, I decided that I should give it another chance and I went out with her once more. Everything was actually fine for a while, we were happy, and most people weren't complaining but then shit hit the fan. My friend, lets call him J, decides to tell me that my ex (the girl I'm currently dating) had actually slept with the guy who ruined our relationship in the beginning. Hearing this, I automatically confronted her and broke up with her when she admitted it.

Now, in THE SAME WEEK, she texted me after we went a couple days without talking, basically explaining why it happened (she still had feelings for me, she wanted to get over me, she assumed that losing her virginity would make her forget me). Still after hearing all of this I questioned why it had to be him that she slept with, she could have slept with 2 other guys and i could've looked past it eventually but the fact that it was him of all people just upsets me immensily. It even upset me to the point where I told her that the only chance we had of getting back is when I lose my virginity. Throughout this talk, she told me that she was crazy about me and that she regrets everything she's done and I can't help but feel like that if I dont do this, I might actualy miss out on something good.

Somehow, in the mess of all this, we got back together (surprise surprise) and i told her that i didnt care if she took my virginity or not. Saturday, she came to my house for the very first time and we spent most of the time cuddling and kissing but then near the end of the day things got VERY intimate but she left before anything got too serious.

So now here's the question, and I'm not asking for all the answers, I just need some outside opinions.....I want to be with her, because i do like her a lot, love? I dont know but I do like her a lot. Do you guys think that this relationship is doomed and I should end it or should I believe her and try to work this out?

(Since I can't find the link to the first post, basically new girl in school starts "talking" with a friend of mine. I start talking with her too but was never told about the other side. Before I ask girl out, she kisses my friend but decides that she'd rather be with me. I lose all my trust in her and the relationship leads to a bit of depression and we end it.)

Please be brutally honest, I need all the help I can get
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Devious Comments

:iconk1k0r0:
k1k0r0 Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Sometimes we are more in love with being in love, it's flattering to know someone has feelings for you, but you should realize that you only started longing for a re-connection after you heard about these feelings! So what does that mean to you? Before that you were a happy go lucky kid. I'd say stick with that.
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:iconmonsterpaladin:
Monsterpaladin Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Student General Artist
Dump her, she's too much trouble. Find someone new, a whole fresh relationship. I totally agree with the person who said that thing about the pig.
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:iconthenecco:
TheNecco Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Student General Artist
I wouldn't get back together. I don't believe in 2nd chances... or third

I'm not saying that she would cheat again, because if you weren't together, she wasn't cheating. But I think both of you are too immature to be in a relationship together.

You're young, don't rush things, you don't need to be in a relationship to begin with. Just have fun with friends and get good grades. These are the most important things at your age :)
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Yea that's the thing that I've been noticing, she doesn't cheat but it's as if she's seeing how far she can go before it's classified as cheating.
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:iconlegendarysuperman:
LegendarySuperman Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You're both being completely childish here :roll: Move on with your life, and grow the hell up. She should do the same.
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:iconladyzelda1:
LadyZelda1 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Well consider this old saying - Why does a pig that has been washed and cleaned go back to wallowing in the mire? Or why does an alcoholic that has been dried out go back to drinking? You were clean, and you were sober, so why go back and do the whole thing over again? Don't be played again. Cease and desist or you may be a good candidate for Jerry Springer's show - "Baggage".
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Thanks for the advice, I need this
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:icondorkface4:
dorkface4 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
I'd leave it. You need to work on your insecurity and jealousy. You broke up with her, she slept with someone else, and you're upset about it? You don't get to dictate who she sleeps with. Sure she could have slept with someone else but clearly she didn't want to. She kisses your friend BEFORE you ask her out and you lose all trust in her? She wasn't going out with you, she can kiss who she wants.

You only want to get back with her when you lose your virginity? WTF is with that.
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Thanks, I've heard that a lot too and its true, and I'm not saying this to kissass but I did tell her that me saying "only when I lose when virginity" is irrational.
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:icondorkface4:
dorkface4 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Well at least you are aware of it so that's a good thing. Best of luck
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Thank you
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:iconeuterpe-the-egret:
Euterpe-The-Egret Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I'm not sure how old you are. That would really help things out a bit.

Personally, I'd say to drop it. There is a lot of baggage there that won't be going away. Let her go and move on.
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
I'm 16, a junior in highschool o:
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:iconeuterpe-the-egret:
Euterpe-The-Egret Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I'd say that you should let her go. You don't want to lose your virginity at such a young age to someone who doesn't mean that much to you. Move on and find someone who is going to respect and love you instead of create drama.

Have fun while you are young. Don't hold on to extra stress that you don't need.
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:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012   Digital Artist
You're 16, you're going to have a lot more relationships, stop building one on top of a mountain of bad things, because it's only going to keep building up and wasting both your time in misery. You're young, and you should be enjoying that instead of obsessing over one girl. Obviously there is a lot going on, so just separate yourself from it. You're right she could've slept with any one, but she slept with him for a reason, and really it just seems like shes lonely right now, and using you as her fall back. Trying to salvage a relationship like that at your age just wastes time you could be having much better ones with better people.
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Thats something that's been on my mind for a long time mostly because over the summer break I had many chances to start new things but I didnt do anything about them and I just keep thinking that this is something I might regret too.
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:iconsiantjudas:
siantjudas Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012   Digital Artist
Move on, it's the best especially for you. A new relationship will start from scratch and have the potential to be great. Here, it's starting from a bad beginning with loads of history and negativity, it would be hard even for someone older and wiser to make that work.
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
I understand, but I think I'm going to do what dorkface4 and a couple of my friends suggested, I have a couple problems to work on before I enter a commitment with someone.
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:icondoomblade2712:
Doomblade2712 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Sounds like a total mess but I'm sure you can make something of it and salvage what's left over and keep going~ it's up to you to decide what's best for your life whether it's with your ex or without. Try being objective about things and see it sort of from the outside looking in...
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
I've gotten tons of opinions of it, the most recent from my dad who found out but eh, I'm trying to think of this from a logical point of view and both options sort of make sense, but as of now I'm thinking of being with her and seeing where it leads.
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:icondoomblade2712:
Doomblade2712 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
I see, well, hope you two last together~ if not then you'll learn from what didn't work etc. Good luck aye!! :D
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:iconopaxl:
OPaxl Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
Thanks, I need some positivity x)
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:icondoomblade2712:
Doomblade2712 Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
You're welcome, thank you!! And take it slow~
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