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May 26, 2012
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Replies: 59

Relationship Worries?

Forums > Community > Help with Life
:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 26, 2012  Student General Artist
What can you do when you feel a bit paranoid that your boyfriend and his ex after breaking up a while ago are still in touch? You know and see they are just friends...and she tries contacting you to "talk" with you but in reality she asked about your boyfriend ?


I am sorry I just thing happened in the past with me and my boyfriend and we got back together..I just don't want the cycle to repeat over again..and I want to make sure what he shows and feels for me is real to me this second time around?

Any tips to making a relationship really work and strong, despite the ex? Thanks everyone! It is just this fear I am facing when I know I shouldn't ...

Sadly don't want to be rude but I wish she was out the picture like to stop being so desperate to get him back when he is with me... but I am not possessive we all have lives to live :nod: Yet I am very cautious this second time around..
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:iconamalaazula:
~AmalaAzula May 26, 2012   Digital Artist
Personally, I don't believe in a boyfriend or girlfriend remaining friends with their ex. That screams trouble. THe best a person can do to move on from a past relationship is have no contact with them. But if your friends with them, it causes suspicion. If I were in your shoes I'd tell him I wasnt comfortable with him being friends with his ex. And hopefully he'll have the balls to lose his ex and give his full attention on you because you are with him now and that's all that matters.
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:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 26, 2012  Student General Artist
I so agree!!! Thank you! I will and I hope he sees that and understands if not then this second chance is done
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:iconglori305:
~Glori305 May 26, 2012
If she is trying to talk to you, most likely the only thing the two of you have in common is the BF. Set up a time to meet for coffee and really get to know each other.

The more friendly you two are, the less likely she is to do something with him.
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:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 26, 2012  Student General Artist
Well she bumped into me last week she didn't believe I was w him.. But he proved it to her I guess so.. Yeah..

She and I USE to be best friends but we stopped I stopped like a year more than that ago we weren't really friends of I considered..

Yet lately she came clingy calling me her "bff"
I'm like no sweetie :stare:
I didn't contact her she emailed me days ago I deleted it
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:iconavenvia:
~Avenvia May 26, 2012  Student Writer
If it's obvious that she's after something more than friendship, perhaps a quiet talk with your boyfriend might be good. It's important that you let him know that you aren't accusing him of cheating or having feelings for her, but you feel like she has more than friendly feelings towards him. That way, you'll be able to have a discussion about it rather than make it seem like you're ordering him not to talk to her.
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:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 26, 2012  Student General Artist
thank you i will speak to him then and i hope he understands if he truly cares :heart:
i really hope he does and well he says they are just friends and got a bit defensive one time to tell me to just leave her alone which i did..

bright side is he tells people they are friends yet no idea why she sends him pics on email and stuff which i see everything =/ he has nothing to hide yet i hate this fear
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:iconavenvia:
~Avenvia May 26, 2012  Student Writer
Just keep reminding yourself that he's honest, he cares for you, and he wouldn't betray you.

What's the thing you're most paranoid about that she does? Some people are just affectionate, so you don't want to seem paranoid if she's the same with all her friends, you know? =)
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:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 26, 2012  Student General Artist
:hug: this made me smile! Thanks I feel a bit better !

Well what gets me paranoid is her messages and emailing pics to him :stare: (not like that normal ones) and well I guess just scared he will go back to her since they had a long relationship ( 3 years) and/or is with her ..

I guess maybe but she is just... Eh.
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:iconavenvia:
~Avenvia May 27, 2012  Student Writer
Maybe you could ask him to tell her to ease off a bit on the pictures and messages? If she's on Facebook, surely he'd see them anyway and then she shouldn't need to send them to him specifically?

Thanks, I'm glad I've helped you a bit =)
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:iconnerdiibunniix3:
!NerdiiBunniix3 May 27, 2012  Student General Artist
i would talk to her but i really do not want to especially since he saw i deleted the message and if she writes to me one day then maybe i will let her know...

she has Facebook but i don't have her ..weird thing is i don't see any posts or anything of him on there and it looks so bare now unlike before it was flooded with just them so i have no worries on that..unless she hide them since I'm not her friend .. ? man this paranoia Dx i have no idea why she sends pics of her specifically to him and it just got me a bit jealous,,,

i just hate jealousy and i will not let it get the best out of me
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