Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login

Details

Closed to new replies
September 22, 2010
Link

Statistics

Replies: 65

Poem asking a girl to be my girlfriend

:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
I know she would want something cute and would be disapointed if I justed asked, so I figure I should write a poem but its harder then I thought so I need help. Please...

All I could come up with is this-

I'm sorry this took so long to say,
But I think about you every day.
I love you more than you may know,
sometimes I just dont let it show.
your the only person I want to see,
will you go out with me?

It needs more? It sucks? let me know what you think :/
Reply

You can no longer comment on this thread as it was closed due to no activity for a month.

Devious Comments

:iconquail123:
Quail123 Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2010
it could work but why dont you just ask her like a normal person
if you want to be romantic think of the perfect place to take her not how you are going to ask her
plus if she doesnt say yes that would just be very awkward
Reply
:iconsnowgeist:
snowgeist Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2010
Personally, I think the whole poem aspect is creepy as fuck.
Reply
:iconsnowgeist:
snowgeist Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2010
Personally, I think the whole poem aspect is creepy as fuck.
Reply
:iconilovebigcats:
ILoveBigCats Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2010  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Um. No.
Reply
:iconprinnia:
Prinnia Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
I think it's really sweet and cute because it's simple. Keep it the way it is :)

This is coming from a girl, by the way. If it seems like you're trying to hard to make it seem epic and romantic it'll just be cheesy.
Reply
:iconazureastra7:
azureastra7 Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010
Gotta go with 'Aret' and 'TheNecco' change that scary thing to like.
Reply
:iconninick-the-demon:
ninick-the-demon Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
It's so cute ^^ I wish a guy would write me poems like that =(
Reply
:iconchex-mix:
chex-mix Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010
The idea is cute!
Though if you think it would be awkward,
just try to say it with swag and don't monotone. Be expressive, act cool about it.

I think a good idea would be to pretend to be making it up on the spot xP
that way, if she thinks it's lame or something, you can just play it off like 'hayyy i made it up in like 5 seconds'

It makes you look like a poetic genius AND you get the girl (:
Reply
:iconfleetingspirit:
fleetingspirit Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Student General Artist
I think that the poem's actually really cute. It shows that you really like her if you're willing to write a poem to her asking for her to be your girlfriend.

However...
I think you should leave out the "I love you more than you may know," part.
Instead, I think you should write something along the lines of "I care about you more than you may know".

Because if you tell her you love her right now, it won't mean as much as you do when you are together and you tell her that you love her.

Try not to rush into things.

But... If you still feel like keeping the "I love you" part in, it's completely fine too since it's your poem to her.

Best of luck :hug:
Reply
:icontechnoparade:
technoparade Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010   Digital Artist

It's adorable but I think you should just ask her out in person. I think it would be cuter if you asked her face to face anyway <:
good luck!
Reply
:iconkyokui:
Kyokui Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
Personally, I am a girl who loves cheesy things, (especially poems like this). I've been asked out via poem before, so I know for a fact that it works!

Just understand that this girl may not like cheesy things at all, and a poem could simply creep her out or turn her off. If you know her well, you'll probably know what she likes and what she doesn't like, and if you write her a poem she will at least be flattered if anything.

If you do decide to give her the poem I would do two things:

1) I know this has been said before, but maybe replace the word "love" with "like"? Love can come off too strong to some.
2) If you give her the poem, stay with her and watch her read the poem. Don't just hand it to her and run off like some coward. Maybe she'll have some positive reactions that you'll want to see! =)
Reply
:iconautogatos:
autogatos Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
As this line of comments suggests, every girl is different: [link]
I think your best strategy, if you want to give her something that shows you care, is to tailor the gift specifically to her personality and interests.

If she likes poems, give her the poem (although I would agree on leaving "love" out, you don't want her to feel pressured or rushed before you're even dating, she might be intimidated by that), if she likes flowers, give her flowers, if she likes chocolate, give her chocolate, if she likes something else, give her whatever is relevant to that.

And if you don't know her well enough yet to know specifically what she would be excited to receive, then you don't know her well enough to write that poem yet. If that's the case, I'd start with something simple and more noncommittal so she doesn't back off right away or feel uncomfortable that you're rushing things. Just ask her if she'd like to go get a cup of coffee or see a movie or grab some lunch/dinner sometime.
Reply
:iconsomeoneelseno:
someoneelseno Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
I'm going to start by apologizing for all the rude and unhelpful comments you've been getting about this. Sometimes I think people skim through these forums looking for people to harass >.< Anyway, I think the poem is very cute, and it's a great way to ask someone out! Don't listen to the people who are saying you're too old for it, or it's cheesy, because that's not true. (Most of them are boys anyway, and what do they know!) But if I might, I'm unsure of how comfortable this girl will be with you using the word 'love'. I mean, I don't know either of you personally, so I can't say for sure how she'll respond to that, but some girls might find that a little too ... rushed, you know? Don't worry, you'll have plenty of time to tell her that later in your relationship, so just take it slow! :) Maybe try replacing the word love with something like "I care for you more than you may know". It still gets the point across that she has a special place in your heart. Well, good luck, I hope things go great for you and her! :D
Reply
:iconkittengoo:
Kittengoo Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Student Digital Artist
Nah just tell her without the poem. It's more sincere and direct.
Reply
:iconi-am-resisty:
I-AM-RESISTY Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
Try this.
Walk up to her and say, "Want to "Enjoyable Activity X" some time?"
Reply
:iconsommerfuggel:
sommerfuggel Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
I agree with bohobella.

If it was me, I would think it's very cheesy...
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
This would interest me maybe if I was ten, and even then I'd probably think it was cheesy. If you want to make her swoon, do it with some flowers or a box of chocolates. A poem can be pretty cringe-worthy and awkward for the girl.
Reply
:iconsaartha:
saartha Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, because flowers and a box of chocolate are so much less cheesy. With a poem, she can at least write a rejection limerick.
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
You clearly have never experienced rejection flowers or rejection chocolate!

But in seriousness, I like eating chocolate. I do not like sappy rhymes.
Reply
:iconsaartha:
saartha Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Well yeah. I would laugh in this guy's face if he gave me a crappy poem like that. But I wouldn't be any happier with flowers/chocolate, because I would feel like my affection was being bought. It doesn't make me happy with people buy things for me. But I know a lot of girls enjoy getting those sorts of things.
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
Like I said, I just like eating chocolates. My dog likes eating flowers. It's win-win.
Reply
:iconautogatos:
autogatos Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
But what if she doesn't like chocolate? :ohnoes:
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
Then she's not worth dating.
Reply
:iconloveinthesnow:
LOVEintheSNOW Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Hobbyist
:noes: What if she's allergic to chocolate?
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
TOO BAD
Reply
:iconloveinthesnow:
LOVEintheSNOW Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2010  Hobbyist
:iconbutbutplz:
Reply
:iconautogatos:
autogatos Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
Now now, chocolate-haters are people too.
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
I'm skeptical.
Reply
:iconautogatos:
autogatos Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Digital Artist
I don't like chocolate. :eyes:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsinnyfreak:
sinnyfreak Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
are you 12 or something? :lol: thats not the way to ask out a girl.
Reply
:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
says who lol
Reply
:icon30minutes30lies:
30minutes30lies Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
Instead of like or love--I'd say "I CARE about you more than you know."
Reply
:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
thats a good idea thanks
Reply
:iconthenecco:
TheNecco Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010  Student General Artist
Change love to like
Reply
:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
its sounds fine with like... i might do that thanks :)
Reply
:iconacosby:
acosby Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
5 months is plenty of time. Knew my wife a week before we went out. 1 week after that we were 6 nights together 1 night off. 2 weeks after that I gave notice at my place. 1month later we lived together. 1 year later we were married.

Fuck it. go for it.

Although to be honest 10 years later we're getting divorced. but fuck we had a good time. lol
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
:lol: I was about to say "I smell divorce" and whatdoyouknow. There's a reason rushing is bad yet you're still encouraging it.
Reply
:iconacosby:
acosby Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
I had a good run and a good time. Whats life without mistakes? Yeah rushing is a risky prospect, but he's known the girl for 5 months, thats hardly rushing. In fact I'd recommend moving quicker lest he get Friend Zoned.
Reply
:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010  Professional Traditional Artist
Five months is a fuck load of rushing for "love". I would be alright to date and fuck someone after five months, but that's about it. Marriage? Pfft. Whoever I marry I will date for years beforehand, because divorce shouldn't be as common of a quick-fix solution as it is today, and I don't want legal bullshit with some shmuck I barely know.
Reply
:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
lol
Reply
:iconsharpguard:
SharpGuard Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
I say just ask her out, the poem is a bit much, plus you wanna make it spicy, get some sophisticated fancy language and use it for later occasions.
Reply
:iconshadowofauther:
ShadowOfAuther Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
Don't do it, Just ask her out in person. Even tho it is a cool poem use it as like a later thing, So like be. Hey i was going to use this to ask you out, But i did it in person instead, you will feel better if you ask her in person than giving her a note asking her out. Man grow some and ask her out!
Reply
:iconrobbanks215:
RobBanks215 Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
cool poem.
Reply
:icon30minutes30lies:
30minutes30lies Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
No, I think that it is perfect.

Five months isn't a rush. If the poem was more extreme, I'd say tone it down, but it's not overbearing or anything (Like I'd die for you--I love you..ects.)

If she thinks you are being a stalker, then she doesn't like you. Honest truth: a guy could bump into a girl, and if she hates him--she will think he is a stalker. If she likes him, she'll call it fate.

Ah, girls....what weird minds we have.
Reply
:iconangelishi:
angelishi Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
"I love you more than you may know,"

It does have "I love you".
Reply
:icon30minutes30lies:
30minutes30lies Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2010
I just noticed that....hum hum.
Reply
:icon30minutes30lies:
30minutes30lies Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
I think it's pretty darn cute. I'd say yes ;)

It's not professional or anything (I don't know how extreme you're wanting here), but I think that if she likes you--she will definately say yes.
Reply
:iconinfamousag:
InfamousAG Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
well thanks :) anything you think I should add or take out? its going to be on the back of a drawing of just our hands holding.
Reply
:iconaret:
Aret Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
The L word = BAD IDEA. Never tell a girl you love her when you barely know her, or she barely knows you. You'll come across creepy and stalker-ish, or like you're rushing way too much.
Reply
:iconhisnameisdaveyoufool:
HisnameisDaveyoufool Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2010
Is that so?


...I wish I figured this out earlier. Woulda saved me some trouble. D:
Reply
Add a Comment: