FML Women can never be wrong obviously.
Today my wife cussed me out. That started an argument. In the process of this argument she admits she started cussing me out over something petty. Then later she admits that the reason for cussing me out would have been avoided if she wouldn't have jumped to conclusions. This argument had to have lasted 15- 30 minutes. It wasn't a horrible argument, we've had way worse.
Still, after taking a few minutes to separate and calm down we start talking casually about why were arguing. She claimed there is no underlying problem with me that she can think of. She said she hasn't been displeased with me enough to consider it worth arguing over.
Yet, she did make it clear that I am the asshole for persisting the argument, and not handling it in the right manner.
So now I'm left here in the dark. What am I supposed to gain from this if I didn't do anything to deserve such treatment?
Why am I the asshole for defending myself when subjected to mistreatment?
All I gather is that this is an inconsiderate hypocritical double standard of hers.
/rant
Still, after taking a few minutes to separate and calm down we start talking casually about why were arguing. She claimed there is no underlying problem with me that she can think of. She said she hasn't been displeased with me enough to consider it worth arguing over.
Yet, she did make it clear that I am the asshole for persisting the argument, and not handling it in the right manner.
So now I'm left here in the dark. What am I supposed to gain from this if I didn't do anything to deserve such treatment?
Why am I the asshole for defending myself when subjected to mistreatment?
All I gather is that this is an inconsiderate hypocritical double standard of hers.
/rant
Comments108
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
I don't know about all women, but it sounds like your wife might be one of those people who never admits anything is her fault. I really hate it when people are like that. 
I think just like people have selective hearing, we have selective faults. I'm sure to be guilty of it at times as well. Not to excuse it, just stating an idea.
word
it sounds like she needs a spanking
get on that
get on that
that's women
All your post. True.
I hate people that have to be right. My mother was that way. I have to deal with some people at work that way now too. Would say more but for all I know they look at my DA.
I hate people that have to be right. My mother was that way. I have to deal with some people at work that way now too. Would say more but for all I know they look at my DA.
Thank you for your perspective.
Yay for stress right? No need for details.
Just don't let your emotions eat you alive. Find some release.
Yay for stress right? No need for details.
Just don't let your emotions eat you alive. Find some release.
So far its been a lot of sexual activity, chocolate, and alcohol. Two of those things I cant do AT work T.T I need to find a way to be productive at work and wont make me fat...er...
Focus on work that needs to be done maybe? Not to be rude, was just stating my first thought. Find motivation and don't reward yourself for undesired behavior.
Im only 2 weeks into the job 
my "work" is sitting next to someone and watching what they do. Thats the entirety of it.
I dont think I have been doing anything undesirable....yet.
my "work" is sitting next to someone and watching what they do. Thats the entirety of it.I dont think I have been doing anything undesirable....yet.
You're already displeased and it's only 2 weeks, that can't be good. Keep doing what's best and stay optimistic. Things could always be worse.
Yeah. If I can last 6 months or more I can put it on my resume with some relevance. So hopefully it wont be a waste of anything but frustration.
Make her be the little spoon tonight.
Most arguments of an emotional nature between significant others are usually pointless, except maybe to demonstrate how willing each one is to spew vitriol at the other. If you really care about your wife's feelings, then there is no "winning" an argument like this, facts be damned.
100% truth. I try to consider "winning" as resolving the problem regardless of where the blame lies. It doesn't matter how the water got in the boat, all that matters is we get the water out before we sink.
The funny part is that the people on here is trying to shift most of the blame on to you instead of the wife.
Well I am partially to blame. I could have went about the situation in a slightly different manner as Aret suggested. which is actually good advice for me and my passive strategy.
I wasn't looking to place blame as much as I was interested in letting go of my emotions and opening myself up to the community here.
The title provoked the blame placing though, I should have thought that out better.
I wasn't looking to place blame as much as I was interested in letting go of my emotions and opening myself up to the community here.
The title provoked the blame placing though, I should have thought that out better.
I know.
It shows how true the sarcastic title is.
I know. Despite the OP then talking to his wife calmly, people still want to pin most of the blame on him.
Goes to show how judgmental people are.
Yup.
I still neglect to see how it is her fault that you argued back instead of taking a calm, logical approach to dissolve the issues she presented.
The only double standard here is that you think you're not equally to blame, just because your wife is adult enough to admit after the fact that she argued for all of the wrong reasons. What I gather is that you're playing the victim because "I had to defend myself", rather than "I had to try to resolve the problem".
The only double standard here is that you think you're not equally to blame, just because your wife is adult enough to admit after the fact that she argued for all of the wrong reasons. What I gather is that you're playing the victim because "I had to defend myself", rather than "I had to try to resolve the problem".
Aside from neither of us having a clear depiction of what really caused the occurrence, the situation was resolved in 15 to 20 minutes. I'm sorry you doubt I was calm and that I didn't try to take a relaxed approach. Sometimes it's not that easy to calm certain types of people or situations for various reasons.