If there is anything that annoys me, there is walls of text, it doesn't matter where they show up, or in what context, but they make me want to poke my eyes out with a spoon. Or something. One thing is when you find it in random places on the internet, but my new history book has them. Or, it's not really walls of text, but instead of doing the normal thing, having an empty line between things, they just have one space. Like this: . That much space on the next line before they start babbling again, it makes reading almost impossible. On top of that the text is tiny, I wonder who thought that was a good idea. I'd like to find him, and tell him politely that it might be a bad idea. Then there is the stuff in internet forums. You find this post with an idiotic statement, and the poster says "don't argue if you haven't read the post", and then you have this meter long wall of text. Sometimes I try to read it, and it doesn't even make any sense, it wouldn't surprise me if half of it is just chatter about how handsome Justin Beaver is. How come some people do so many silly things, there are many other silly things people do that I don't really understand. For example wearing their pants on their knees, why on earth do they do that, it makes walking difficult. And why do people paint their faces, and shave off their leg hair? Speaking of shaving, I think more guys should have moustaches, like, those pretty twirly things. Only old men have moustaches these days, more young guys should have them. I'm sure, if women had facial hair they'd have all sorts of fancy things going on, colouring, curling, braiding, and probably some spectacular moustaches. But the boring guys just shave it all off. Why do so few people these days appreciate nature, I go outside, and just "YAY TREES", but nobody else I know seems to like it. Wind is fascinating, the way it works, and can get so powerful that it breaks stuff. And fire is fascinating, it can destroy almost everything, but at least here in the north we would probably be doomed without it. And water, water does that too, just that it does it very very slowly, but we would be doomed without that too. Come to think about it, if nature suddenly decided it hated us, we'd be dead in no time, no time at all. I think that maybe I'll just pour out everything on my mind now. Some atheists are obnoxious, okay, you believe in evolution, and you think I'm an idiot, I get it, now shut up. Not all of them though, some of my best friends are atheists, and some are actually Satanists, apparently. Oh well, I'm a Christian, and I don't think any of you will ever change that... Because... Because I've WITNESSED things! That means I'm either insane, or something is out there. Thinking like this, that should actually be proof that there is nothing out there at all, since it's established that my mind doesn't work correctly, but.... Oh well, but who decides what is correct anyway, maybe my mind is working correctly, and all of you people have minds that are broken, thought about that, huh? HUH? I feel like singing a song now. Nah, I won't. Now you've probably already gotten my point about walls of text, but I'll continue anyway. Does this forum even have a character limit? I think I'll tell you the h2g2 entry on Guinea Pigs now, because Guinea Pigs are awesome. Now wait a second, copy would ruin this, wouldn't it? Of course, I can't copy paste, and I probably have to make some sort of sense too, right? I think I'll write a poem. But don't poems get rubbish when writing them on a single line? I'll write a poem anyway, here goes. O little leaf lying on the ground, so delicate and round. Did you die by the frost, or did you get stuck in a pater nost.. er elevator? Now that is a poem worthy of a daily deviation, you guys should try a paternoster elevator some time. Also you should try Nordic humour, we find it hilarious, but you'd probably just find it sad. It's like, these super tragic things, and we call it comedy. I'm gonna watch some of it tonight. Okay, now I give up, I think this character limit is really far out there, so I'll give you the h2g2 entry on Guinea pigs. Guinea pigs are smallish, furry things that squeak. A lot. Loudly. They are cavies, a sort of rodent related to the squirrel and coypu. Capybaras are massive versions of guinea pigs that live in rivers and look at things with silly expressions, but guinea pigs are cheaper to feed and louder. They eat vegetables and can be trained to squeak at the sound of the word 'lettuce'. Like rabbits, they eat their own droppings in order to let them have two trips through the digestive system. Now that was only a part of the article, I think that's enough now. I'll find something else fun. Let's have a minutes silence for the victims of 9/11 now. There, now a minutes silence for the victims of the 22'nd of July. And the Chinese children who were stabbed, and the people that were negatively affected by that meteor in Russia. And for suicide victims. Now, let's look at this fact about Lars Monsen, taken from this website [link] , and translated by me: One time, when Lars Monsen and Chuck Norris me tin the woods, Lars Monsen shouted so loudly that Chuck Norris got red hair and freckles. Do you want another fact? Okay then. Lars monsen is 1.83m tall, when he stands on his hind legs he is 5.27m tall. Okay, one last one, but then we have to do something else. Lars Monsen can do push.ups with both his hands on his back. Okay, that's enough, let's look at the last thread written by Illastrat. "5.) They don't plan their compositions. If you are going to do a oil painting you should know your palette and decide how to implement the principles of design. Noobs never sketch out their compositions and they just jump right in. This is wrong.4.) They don't use references. References give your oil painting structure and takes off some of the strain of composition. Combining references is a great way to use them creatively.3.) Dirty colors. When you paint, ALWAYS clean your brush after each pulled color. If you are going for vibrant colors this is a must. Lack of color control is one of the main noob mistakes.2.) Using pure white for highlights and black for shadows. Pure white should never be used for highlights unless you are making an artistic point. Black should not be used either. Instead, you should mix white with a hint of chosen pigment and for shadows use deep purple or mixed blue and brown.1.) Lack of drawing skills. Drawing is a fundamental element. IF you can't draw you should work on that because that means you will never be able to reach your full potential as an artist. Your oil painting will only be as successful as your drawing ability. Painting is the evolution of drawing. If you can draw you should learn or kiss your oil painting aspirations good bye. And this brings me to my complaint, even though this list is concise and helpful, why are you going to scrutinize me? All that hate you have that you are manifesting, why? I am tired of noobs thinking they can be vocal and a critic when they don't even know what to do a partial contour drawing. I think people should humble down and study. But yeah, noobs will always exist but they should know their place." That was interesting, now let's carry on. You got my point yet? No, okay. Now let's sing a song. Bæbælillelam. No wait I don't want to. Let's look at Pakaku's latest thread then. "Or am I.It's been five whole hours and no new threads have been made? You guys are letting me down. Seriously letting me down.I had a silly idea for all of us to collaborate in, but no one is paying any attention! Oh no! Stop reading this instant and go to that journal, give me your thoughts, and continue on.Call-out threads are cool. Especially when you're the one being called out. This will be fun to play wi- Wait, Neuro locked the thread before I could comment??? Oh for fucks sake, you wily bastard, I wanted to have fun with it. Stop getting so excited over things, it's not natural.Somebody's mom wants me to design them a logo. For free. Come on, friend's mom, my art skills are worth some payment, don't you think? Oh, you need the logo by tomorrow? It's almost midnight? Well, don't expect fucking much. And sending the image is proving more difficult than it should be. GodDAMMIT.My attention span is down the shitter. I've been working on the same picture for the past week, since I had no school and piss all to do. It's saturday night and I'm on here, crying my heart out, and basically doing anything except for working on the drawing. Because I can't work on something for a week straight. (Disclaimer: going to force myself to finish it, because it is fucking worth finishing.) WHY IS ART SO HAAARD???Finally, if this complaint is overshadowed by another thread posted within ten seconds or so, I am going to bust out the Jack Daniels so hard you don't even KNOW it. Or maybe. I bought a small bottle out of peer pressure (you folks know who you are), but I'm just that paranoid about not liking a drink. I'm strange. Really....I don't have anything else for you. Sorry." That was a nice one, I'll give you the whole h2g2 article on fish now.FishFish are animals that live in water. They swim about and generally make their environment look a bit prettier1.
How do I know it's a fish?If it lives in water and has gills2, then it's likely to be a fish. Fish, as animals on Earth, have been about for a long time3. They are cold-blooded vertebrates that often have an interesting odour4. Some fish live in the sea, others in rivers and more can be found gleefully swimming about in lakes. Some even exist in ponds. Fish don't live in trees, so don't go looking for them there.There are many creatures that swim in water but aren't fish. The bigger ones you might see are whales and dolphins. These aren't fish, they're mammals. Then there are squid and octopuses. These have legs, which most fish do not. If fish have legs then they have either:Evolved.Mutated.Had them stuck on by someone with an absurd sense of humour.Other sea creatures include turtles, jellyfish, sponges, crustaceans (like crabs and lobsters), molluscs (like mussels and oysters), and smaller lifeforms such as krill (a variety of shrimp) and sea monkeys. None of these things are fish. They might live in the water and smell like fish, but they are not. Don't be fooled.Types of FishThere are many varieties of fish on the planet. Some live in cold water, others live in tropical waters. Some like seawater and there are those that prefer fresh water. There are big fish, like sharks. Then there are smaller fish, like salmon, tuna or barramundi. Then there even smaller fish that are lots of pretty colours, like angelfish or tetras. Some fish are poisonous and others are weird shapes and sizes, like swordfish, stonefish and flying fish. Some have interesting talents and others glow like neon signs. There are even fish called seahorses that aren't horses and don't look at all like fish, but are. Confusing isn't it? There's pretty much a fish for any occasion.Where to See FishThe best place to go and see fish is in their natural habitat - water. If you can't scuba-dive, or swim, you could try going to an aquarium. Many aquariums offer visitors wonderful experiences like 'touch pools' (where you can play with little sea creatures), 'feeding time' (where you can feed the fish) and expensive soft toys.If you have no money to pay the admittance charge to an aquarium your next best option is to visit a pet shop. They won't charge you for going in and looking and you could see some other nice animals too5.Another option is to try getting on a submarine. These vehicles can transport you under the waves into the realm of the fish, but a lot of them don't have windows so you may not see many fish. Lots of sweaty sailors, but no fish6.If all else fails you might try befriending someone who owns either a fish tank of their own or a pond7. Then you might see some fish. And have a nice cup of tea too.If you can't be bothered leaving the house to see fish you could just watch the television. From David Attenborough's Blue Planet through to fishing shows like Rex Hunt's Fishing or Fishing with John, you should catch a glimpse of a fish. Or nod off, which isn't bad either.Catching FishNot as easy as simply holding out your hand and letting a fish fall into it. Catching fish is not like catching a cold - it is an art form, which many people enjoy as a hobby. It is known either quite simply as 'fishing' or by the more technical term 'angling'. Fishing is undertaken in a variety of places throughout the world - be it on rivers in Germany or lakes in America, on the ice in cold places like Alaska or simply off a pier. It is generally done where you would expect fish to live8. Don't go fishing in an inner-city car park as you are unlikely to catch a fish, but more probably an irate motorist. There are places that fishing is prohibited due to environmental reasons, these may include: over-fishing, pollution or it being breeding season.If the traditional rod, line, hook and a worm method of catching a fish isn't your idea of fun, you could always try noodlin', a less expensive and far less effective form of fishing. Whatever method you prefer, once you have caught a fish you have a number of choices: Let it go. Just be happy you have touched one of nature's magnificent creations.Take it home and put it in a fish tank to look at.Kill it and eat it.Eating FishIf you choose option three, it is best you also know how to properly prepare a fish for eating and what beverage to drink alongside your meal. White wines are usually found to accompany fish well, although a good lager can be just as nice. Indeed, a clear, cool, refreshing glass of water would do9. Then there's also the matter of what cutlery to use. Eating fish can get very complicated...Fish, for the most part, have a poor lot. They are food for many other animals, such as bigger sea creatures, birds, bears and pets. Fish are enjoyed either as a main meal or just a snack and can be consumed raw or cooked. Humans in particular have developed many methods for serving fish. Recipes involving many different types of fish and just as many different cooking styles are found worldwide. In Japan sushi is popular, while in Britain the fish and chip shop is king of the take-away restaurants. It is a well-known epicurean fact that the battered fish (usually cod) goes alongside the chip as assuredly as the sky is up.In Asia and Europe soups and stews made from fish are common, while in the Americas and Australasia people prefer their fish grilled, fried or barbequed10. It is wise to eat fish freshly-caught, as it can cause stomach upsets if left for too long11. A general rule of thumb, which can be attributed to Benjamin Franklin, is: 'Fish and visitors smell in three days.'Fish - What Do They Represent?The word fish comes from the Old English word fisc and is related to the German fisch, the Dutch vissen and even the Latin piscis. George Bernard Shaw found it more interesting to use the word to highlight odd inconsistencies in the English language. He suggested that perhaps fish should be ghoti. The gh as in tough, the o as in women and the ti as in station. Whatever the explanation, it wouldn't really matter if fish were called bunkwobbits12, humans would still find them useful and exciting.Some cultures have worshipped fish as gods or higher beings. The Masai of Africa do not eat fish as they are considered sacred, in much the same way cows are sacred to the Hindus. Other religions have chosen the fish to symbolise their beliefs. Ancient civilisations have seen fish in the stars, the zodiac sign Pisces being represented by two fish. The story is as follows: Once upon a time, a big monster13 appeared while Aphrodite and her son, Eros, were bathing in the Euphrates River. They turned into two fish (Aphrodite being the larger one) to hide from said monster. The goddess Athena later put the two fish in the sky, the constellation Pisces being the end result.Fish are often used ornamentally, both as real-life additions to the decor and pictorially through the eyes of an artist. Many artists have drawn inspiration from fish, from the creators of Roman mosaics through to notable artists such as surrealist Salvador Dali and MC Escher.Some people have even invented fish, for example Douglas Adams created the Babelfish to explain why aliens all speak English in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. There are also many songs and stories about fish, like the traditional children's rhyme: One, Two, Three, Four, Five Once I caught a fish alive.And of course, this couldn't be a comprehensive guide to fish without mentioning Monty Python's Flying Circus's 'fish-slapping dance'. If it weren't for fish, many other parts of human life would be devoid of interest."So long, and thanks for all the fish." - Douglas Adams Attributed to space-travelling dolphins in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy1Except for the ugly fish.2The bits of a fish that act like lungs. They absorb oxygen and remove carbon dioxide so the fish can breathe. Nifty, eh?3Scientists believe that about 450 million years ago the first fish sprang out of the primordial ooze.4Probably giving rise to the phrase 'There's something fishy going on here.'5Birds, kittens, rabbits, hamsters, guinea pigs, mice and dogs. If you are extremely lucky you may find rats, snakes and spiders also.6For a deep sea submarine experience, there is the possibility of visiting a centre like The Deep.7Both of which are usually filled with the worldwide favourite pet fish - goldfish.8However, don't take a rod and reel to an aquarium, the staff won't like it at all. For that matter, the fish probably won't be that thrilled either.9Although WC Fields cautioned against drinking water, because (paraphrasing slightly) fish fornicate in it.10While in Iceland they do some interesting things with fish.11Although dried fish can be nice, and this involves leaving them out in the sun for a bit.12This is a made-up word.13Possibly a Megalodon. That was bautiful, Let's now look at an extract from the wikipedia article on idiot. Idiot as a word derived from the Greek ἰδιώτης, idiōtēs ("person lacking professional skill", "a private citizen", "individual"), from ἴδιος, idios ("private", "one's own"). In Latin the word idiota ("ordinary person, layman") preceded the Late Latin meaning "uneducated or ignorant person." Its modern meaning and form dates back to Middle English around the year 1300, from the Old French idiote ("uneducated or ignorant person"). The related word idiocy dates to 1487 and may have been analogously modeled on the words prophet and prophecy. The word has cognates in many other languages.An idiot in Athenian democracy was someone who was characterized by self-centeredness and concerned almost exclusively with private—as opposed to public—affairs. Idiocy was the natural state of ignorance into which all persons were born and its opposite, citizenship, was effected through formalized education.In Athenian democracy, idiots were born and citizens were made through education (although citizenship was also largely hereditary). "Idiot" originally referred to "layman, person lacking professional skill", "person so mentally deficient as to be incapable of ordinary reasoning". Declining to take part in public life, such as democratic government of the polis (city state), was considered dishonorable. "Idiots" were seen as having bad judgment in public and political matters. Over time, the term "idiot" shifted away from its original connotation of selfishness and came to refer to individuals with overall bad judgment–individuals who are "stupid". According to the Bauer-Danker Lexicon, the noun ίδιωτής in ancient Greek meant "civilian" (ref Josephus Bell 2 178), "private citizen" (ref sb 3924 9 25), "private soldier as opposed to officer," (Polybius 1.69), "relatively unskilled, not clever," (Herodotus 2,81 and 7 199).The military connotation in Bauer's definition stems from the fact that ancient Greek armies in the time of total war mobilized all male citizens (to the age of 50) to fight, and many of these citizens tended to fight poorly and ignorantly.In modern English usage, the terms "idiot" and "idiocy" describe an extreme folly or stupidity, and its symptoms (foolish or stupid utterance or deed). In psychology, it is a historical term for the state or condition now called profound mental retardation.Okay, if you have actually read what I told you, then you should be getting my point now, if not you are probably an Idi... uhm.. You have different opinions than me, and I respect that.