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February 20, 2013
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I'm such an emotionally unstable daughter-of-a-mom.

:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
So, like, since June last year I've been living with my uncle because of school. It was clear from the start that it was going to be temporary because living with him would make it a lot easier for me to find my own student housing space thing. Ever since I've felt like a freeload who occupies his space and I feel useless and just sit there. And I wanted nothing more than to move out and be left alone.

And now I found my student housing and I'm moving out this weekend and I feel myself being all emotionally shred up. I don't want to be alone for most of the day. The only social contacts I have during the day are my (seriously) retarded classmates. And I feel bad for him because I know in a way he's going to be terribly lonely too. He's been practically living alone for the last 10 years, then had company, and now I'm leaving again. And to be honest, I can't think of anything to properly thank him. My life changed so much here, there's not enough human words to describe my thanks. And I don't want to come off as an ungrateful bitch but I also know he'll have trouble accepting anything that would cost a lot of money (as he has plenty of it and I... not so much).

But really, brain, damn you to hell. I get what I want and now it's STILL not good? GRR.

Bonus complaint: oh my heavens I have to pack so much stuff :iconcryforeverplz:

tldr: (do people still do these things?) I cry because I don't get what I want and I cry because I get what I want.
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Devious Comments

:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Why not just visit him?
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013
I will, of course.
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:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2013
There's your gift.
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:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Okay, I'm still trying to understand what "daughter-of-a-mom" is supposed to mean. It's been bugging me since you posted this. Is it supposed to be a censored/fixed version of son of a bitch?
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013
It is indeed! Since I am not a son and nor am I birthed by a bitch, there you have it.
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:iconxxtraprince:
XXtraPrince Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Who might you be to call your classmates "retarded"?
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013
I might be me. I can judge people very well on my own. I've had many, many classmates in my life and none of those were as horrible as these.
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:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Who might you be to question her authority?
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:iconxxtraprince:
XXtraPrince Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
An adult. You don't have to be a student of printing and engraving to recognize a counterfeit.
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:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
That didn't make much sense, you've never met her classmates so you have no idea nor are you in any position to argue.
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:iconxxtraprince:
XXtraPrince Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
Your problem is: you're ignorant.
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:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
How in the hell did you reach that conclusion? I'm still confused as to how you think you know more about these classmates than someone actually taking the class?

Or is it that you just can't handle words and had to make a statement about her choice there?
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:iconxxtraprince:
XXtraPrince Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013
This annoying juvenile (much like yourself) is bored by her associates, most likely because her personality (to the extent she has one) is boring in and of itself. So she seeks to denigrate their intelligence to justify her own narrow-mindedness.
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:iconbohobella:
bohobella Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Hah, that's cute. It's very well possible that I'm older than you.

You have no way to prove that because you, my dear, have never stepped foot in this class or met any of them or the OP.
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:iconk-koji:
K-Koji Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
That's sweet ;_;

You could always move back with him :o.

If that's not an option, you could always get him a gift and a card, and write what you feel in the card- leave it somewhere you know he will find it.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Yeah no :P I'm 23, it's about time I started living on my own! But you know, that's not the easiest to do when you sort of have attachment issues.
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:iconk-koji:
K-Koji Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
I totally understand. I'm living on my own now for the first time in awhile and it really takes getting used to.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Not only emotionally but also financially. Sob :P
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:iconfixmeknow:
FixMeKnow Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
I hope you stock up on tissues if you cry that much. :o

Maybe get him a plant?
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Oh believe me, I always have plenty of tissues in stuck. For my allergies alone...
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
This thread is giving me so many feels. I have so many feels right now. Halp.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
*hands tissues*
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Here:[link] Do this.
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
:iconiseewhatyoudidthere:
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Oh shit! No pun intended!
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
.....


I pooped?
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
No, I didn't pooped.
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Ludwig, you're doing that thing again.
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
What thing? I've no clue what is going on!
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(1 Reply)
:iconkell0x:
Kell0x Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Digital Artist
I wanted to point out a comment with someone on this thread.
(whoblockedmewhat?)

But can't you stay and make figure out some agreement ? Chores/paying rent and stuff.
If you want to stay there that is.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
I already pay rent. The whole meaning of my moving in with him was because I used to live very far away from this city and I go to school here. And living with him made it easier to find my own place in this city. I was supposed to move out and I'm glad I found a place but I sort of have attachment issues I guess.
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:iconkell0x:
Kell0x Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Wel as someone who has moved out a couple of times due to school/money issues with other people.

The first weeks are never easy. You might cry a little bit.
But then when it passes you get used to it.
Then again I hated living alone by myself.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
6 years ago I moved 3 or 4 times in one year. First I moved from my parents to my ex, then from my ex to my cousin and then from my cousin back to my parents. But I was sort of emotionally harder back then. I'll probably be fine, but meh.
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:iconkell0x:
Kell0x Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Ah I see. Then you be alright.
Or just waste your first day watching Comedy.
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Odd thing, I once had to move from my first apartment to a new one that was literally across the street. I had never owned an apartment before that town house, and so much happened there as a college junior. I grew close to my new friends there, I shared great moments with my mother and father there when they first saw the place to help me move. Just the little things. Then, I had to get out of there, and set up camp at a different place, (I live alone btw.) I didn't think anything of it initially. An apartment is just an apartment right? Wrong, for some reason I bawled my fucking eyes out the day before the movers came to get all the furniture. It was awful. I still don't know why it hurt so much to leave one place to go to another that was essentially the same.

However, my Father once told me when I was younger that moving is one of the most depressing things a person can do, no matter the situation. He said it was up there with divorce and death. Interesting factoid.

Okay, I'm done. Just thought I'd share, haha.
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well moving only hurts if you are incredibly attached to where you live/the people there. Sometimes I get sad moving but not very much, it barely bothers me the day after.
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Awww :hug: I'm glad you settled down in your own place!

I sort of have attachment issues, so yeeeaaaaaaahhhhh... I've only lived here since June but you know, this is my home. I'm here every day. I cycle the same path every day, I always sit here on this couch, and my uncle and I have these stupid 'inside jokes'. And it's not as if I'm never seeing him again, my new place is a 10 minute cycle away but... It's the whole "change" thing again. I felt like that when I just started living here and it'll be fine in a while when I'm in my new place. But right now it's sort of nasty.
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I know what you mean.

The amazing apartment I shared with four others, when I went to uni, was pretty much the place I grew from being a teenager to an adult.
Those three years were amazing, and I'll always look back on them with longing, even though I don't want to actually live like that again.

And I also always seem to manage a severe head cold and/or hangover, when I move. Ads to the fun in so many ways... :stare:
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Oh my god, yes on that last bit. I always get so tipsy on wine before moving, :lol:
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Because of a hangover, I've moved with a bunch of dirty dishes on a box, because smelling them made me nauseous, so I couldn't wash them before we started moving my stuff.
I get really scent sensitive when I'm hungover (and when I have migraines).
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Gawd, that sounds like a damned drag. :/
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It was so weird and surreal to see them unpacked around the sink in the new place.
I fell asleep after family and friends had left, then woke up all befuddled and kept getting weird doubts like "Did I have dinner here last night? But wasn't the move today? Should I call mum and ask? Oh god no, I can't. But wasn't it today?"
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
:lol:! Oh my gosh, that's a little unsettling.
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It was. I made a pact with myself that day.
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
See, I've never had that feeling. I feel like an outsider no matter where I go, even when I am with family. So when it comes to living arrangements I've always been very uncaring. Nowhere feels like home.
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:iconblackvragor:
blackvragor Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
That makes sense, I definitely felt that way with dorm living. And that's kind of how it was when I was a kid/teenager. My dad moved us all over the east coast until we finally settled in Texas again. I've moved tons of times, and felt pretty blank about it.

I can't explain why I was so upset about leaving that apartment though. Probably because it was mine, and I liked calling it home. Who knows.
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
I didn't move too much as a kid. I moved from Ohio to Southern California and pretty much have been here ever since. But I've never cared much for it.

Perhaps it was because it was your first place, or perhaps you looked at everything you had packed away and saw that your life amounted to a few pieces of furniture and some boxes. I remember feeling a tad sad when I moved into the place I'm at now because of that same thing. I didn't care about moving itself, just that my life meant nothing more than those objects. I've not done anything great, not made any dent, if I were to go tomorrow there would be just those things and a pile of dead flesh and bone.
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
First of all, it's nice to read a HWL thread were everyone involved seem to be really wonderful towards each other. Both you and your uncle sound like good people.

As for the rest, telling him how grateful you are is a good place to start. Or writing a letter.

And obviously, if you're both sort of awkward about talking feelings, you can always claim student typical money/laundry/noise issues and come by his place for meals/laundry/hanging out.

But really, tell him at least once how wonderful he's been and how grateful you are. And mention that you'll miss being around him.
Maybe mention these things to your mum and dad too, and it'll probably pop up in conversation between them and your uncle. It's the good way of being manipulative. :)
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:iconelmida:
Elmida Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013
Aww yes, I'm very positively surprised by all the nice replies here! I didn't expect that.

I think I'm going to stick with the letter because I'm such a bawling child all the time and I don't want to cry. He gave me such a lovely, lovely 'poem' for this Dutch tradition thing called Sinterklaas so I was thinking of doing something like that in return. And ever since then I've wanted to make him an iPad sleeve but I can't find the darn fabrics I need yet hurrhurr. But yeah since he's not really the material type, something handcrafted would be the best kind of gift I think.

And I already said he should come to dinner often at my place now in return hehe. And we like watching movies together. And there's still this Swedish series we have to finish watching so that's also reasons to visit.

It's not as if I'm not seeing him anymore (my new place is a 10 minute cycle) but I guess I have some attachment issues.
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:iconsvataben:
Svataben Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Sounds like you have it figured out. I like the idea of you making him that sleeve; it's something he can use every day. :)

The thing is, you have to make sure it doesn't just become a habit of extending invites, 'cause if you two get into the habit of open invites but not much follow-through, contact can taper out.
It's important especially when you used to live together, because you up till now you didn't have to work at seeing each other. Now you have to, and have to remember to do that.

Best of luck with all of it. What are you studying, btw?
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