I haven't really been "friend-zoned" per se, but I have been "you are a creep that I would never date" zoned.
Granted after years of growing up and trying to better myself physically and mentally, I seem to actually be able to attract women's attention in a positive way as opposed to trying to just get in their pants.
The friend-zone is BS indeed. Just something guys invented to make it feel as if a greater force stops them from being in a relationship with the girl because they're such nice guys- the idea of the friend-zone. While she's in fact not interested in him at all, because he's either unattractive/a douche/incompatible or all of the above.
I never really knew much about this 'friend zone' thing aside from looking up its definition, but you made very good points on why it's such a ridiculous term. I do think it's unfair to blame the other person for not returning your feelings or your own friendship for 'getting in the way', especially if like you mentioned, the person only starts this friendship in hope for a future relationship.
When I was a teenager we never heard of the friendzone, its a new term I suppose or my highschool was really behind. Anyway its so stupid and as I hear more of it it just makes me so mad XC Its quite a plague on this generations relationships I'd say.
I always thought this was a stupid term. :/ Sure, it's a heartbreaker when you like your best friend or something and that don't like you that way, but saying you got friend zoned doesn't really make any sense...
I never understood it either! I remembered once asking a guy out once, and he said he doesn't date friends :/ If anything, you should get to know a person first before considering dating them! I wonder if people do this because if the relationship fails, things aren't as awkward by just not hanging out with them, or ruining a friendship? In my current relationship, me and my fiancee see each other as best friends as well as partners. We became instant friends at first, then less than two months and a junior prom later, we started dating >w< I guess the fact that we could really relate to each other from the start helps.
I have been in a good relationship with him for almost 4 years now >w< Funny though how many teen relationships tend to not work out, but I say having a high school sweetheart is a pretty big accomplishment. I wonder what people go off of if they want to date someone, but AREN'T friends with them. Do they date them purely from looks or something? I mean, if you might have the possibility of living with each other in the future, don't you want to make sure they are actually compatible with your feelings and beliefs?
I had a high school sweetheart. We dated for 4 1/2 years and broke up last July. So actually having a working one is a very big accomplishment I'd say! I hope you guys stay together :3
Or at the very least, what do they DO together? I've known friends where the guy was a huge gamer, and the girl was really into makeup and shopping and hated games and I just look at them and think, "What do they possibly do together?" Man the sex must be really good or something.
That sucks :c But yeah, getting to know each others interests first sounds, I don't know, pretty smart. I mean hell, I'm just glad that with my fiancee, pretty much everything we are interested in, the other is either similarly one of our own hobbies or something we find intriguing. Like for example,, Me and my fiancee love video games, but at the same time, I'm into art and he takes interest in my art, while he's into computers and programming, I take interest and vaguely understand it, but I think it's so neat XD
A friend of mine just got legit friend-zoned. He was moderately involved with his friend for a while, and then the friend turned around and said "Please don't like me. I need us to just be friends." He was picked up and placed in the corner marked "friend-zone."
The two examples I've heard of the Friendzone are: 1. Person A befriends person B simply to date them/get into their pants. When person B doesn't return the feelings, person A abandons the friendship because it was a lose for them. 2. Two people are friends, person A develops feelings for person B which are not returned. Person A blames that they were "too good of friends" to date, and that person B can't see them as more than a friend.
Now heres whats wrong with both of those: 1. Kinda obvious. Its a huge dick move to only befriend someone to date them or get into their pants. You should befriend someone because they seem cool or nice or whatever. If you want to date them, then tell them outright, don't pretend you just want to be friends. 2. Most people don't think someone is too good of a friend to date. They just don't have feelings for them. It would literally be no different than if they weren't friends and they didn't have feelings for them.
So the friendzone is a made up concept to blame when the person you like does not like you back.
The only time I think it's legitimately the friend zone is when this person knows of their feelings but intentionally manipulates them into constant suspension. As for people attempting to skip the friend part and go straight in, I can see your point but it's also a gigantic waste of time in many cases. If you're friends with someone first and both develop feelings that's all fine and dandy, like Chandler and Monica or something, but actively trying to be a friend because you want a relationship is just inefficient and misleading to the other person.
I've seen a good number of people get friendzoned.
Funny shit when you're dealing with someone that you've obviously didn't like in the first place, but yes. I agree that people fearing of the friendzone or is using the friendzone because they're afraid of the relationship turning as bad their previous romance-less relationships is just plain retarded. Though for those that do end up in these kinds of social situations the only advice that I would give to them is to just find someone else. Look for someone else that's more or less just like them. Boom. Friendship follow by a mutual crush and love will follow. It's the only way I'd see it at least.