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February 7, 2013
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Don't you hate that feeling?

:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
You know? The feeling that you should kill yourself because life is totally pointless?

So dig this (it's dug, mother fucker!). I have just recently broken out of one of the worst Existential attacks in recent memory. I was staring at some of my recent finished work (it's the best I've ever done, I mean, everything has been building to this set of work) about a month and a half ago. I was just reveling in everything. But little did I know that that feeling of Absurdity was waiting patiently with it's fist out just behind me. And I turned right into the fucking thing.

So from then until earlier today I was a miserable wretch. So held down by the human condition that every emotion I could possibly have was heightened. And what emotion could I possibly have with the feeling of Absurdity? That's right, depression. I was on the brink of suicide so many times that some of my more caring friends were trying to get the men in the white coats to come and get me. It was so horrid that I almost didn't go an hour without weeping uncontrollably.

tl;dr: Feeling of Absurdity, hated existence, wanted to die.

I think it's about time to read The Myth of Sisyphus again.

Anti complaint: I've moved my work to a larger studio. Better light, heat and A/C, and tons of space including a room for storing dried paintings.
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Devious Comments

:iconanvirgin:
AnVirgin Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ludwig... you didn't call me after that special night we had... you perro
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Perro? I'm a dog?
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:iconanvirgin:
AnVirgin Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Of course you're a dog... that would explain why you don't know what you're doing to me, Ludwig.
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
I'm a Spanish dog?
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:iconanvirgin:
AnVirgin Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Shhhhh, ludwig... we're over... I can't take these long distance shenanigans
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Long distance eh?
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:iconanvirgin:
AnVirgin Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm sick of playing these games these days.
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Why are you sick?
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(1 Reply)
:icon0rg:
0rg Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013
I know exactly how you feel

or, at least somewhat exactly

I generally know how you feel, probably

kind of
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:iconludwigvankickass2:
LudwigvanKickass2 Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2013  Professional Traditional Artist
Maybe?
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