Funny thing is, swearing can in a way make me sound a bit smarter, because I don't fuck up my speaking when I swear. I don't look down on people who swear consistently (unless you're randoming adding fuck three times every two sentences, then you sound like a moron); in fact, masterful use of foul language is to be admired! I do, however, not think very highly of chatspeak, but that's just because I can't stand to see improper grammar and spelling.
I should point out that I'm referring to when I actually talk as opposed to when I type. I often don't pronounce words correctly, can't entirely convey what I mean or try to say two different words at once, so anything that can help me speak properly I will employ whenever possible. I tried using chatspeak when I first got a mobile phone, but I died a little inside every time I tried so now I just use whole English.
Though if I typed exactly how I spoke, I would sound far less intelligent. I'm in a habit of conjoining two words more than I should and leaving "g"s off the ends of words. Also I refer to everyone as dude, bro and man, regardless of gender. To think that chatspeak is supposed to be a way of writing messages faster.
I have a strong dislike for chatspeak being used outside of texting and I have a good reason: I review things submitted for publication and sometimes they have chatspeak in them. This is stuff outside of the internet and done formally. And it looks terrible.
I just can't understand text speak, to be honest. My tutor actually said to me the amount of times she had to fail her students works because they actually do use text speak in their essays or assignments.
Besides, I like Descartes, he was the laziest man in the 16th century and never got up before noon. Like me. <3