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January 4, 2013
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Replies: 71

That damn Neighbor!

:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I live in a typical suburban neighborhood where people gather together and let their kids and dogs frolic in the large... Fuck this.

My neighborhood is crap, especially the guy living next to me on the left. He's very possessive and just a jackass in general. Before his house was built my lot extended out a lot more. I offered that much land so they could build another house in exchange for RV access and community parking (which is a big slab of concrete visitors can park on) because honestly I didn't need all that extra land. So they built a house there and things were great for a couple of years then about eight months ago a couple moved in from who knows where. These people are some of the most unlikable people alive. I tried saying hello to the wife one day and she looked at me like I was crazy. Fine bitch, be like that.

Well then they decided that the big community parking space belonged to THEM when actually, it belongs to the community. My other neighbor's son is visiting for the holidays and new years. Well he's been parking in the community space since it's like a half culdesac so there isn't much parking space by his house. So bitch neighbors went over to thei house yesterday WITH A FUCKING HAMMER telling them to get their truck off of their property or else he was going to smash the truck to pieces and then their windows and kid's toys. I was sitting outside on my front porch ready to call the cops in case a fight broke out. :stare: Luckily that didn't happen and the neighbor's son moved his truck into my driveway (I offered the space to him after watching this) so there was no violence. I explained to the son that the parking area was originally part of my property and that the agreement stated that it was community parking. Since he wasn't doing anything illegal he moved his truck back to the original space this morning.

Bitch neighbor returned, without a hammer this time, and started yelling across my driveway at my decent neighbors telling them that it was his property and to move. So I went outside to make sure a fight didn't break out. Bitch neighbor then started bitching to me about how I gave HIM the parking space. No. The house was built two years before he and his crazy wife moved in. I tried to explain to him that it was community parking and he had no right to cause shit with my neighbors. He started calling me a "white whore" and that it was his.

My friend eventually got bitch neighbor to piss off and the son moved his truck into my RV space on MY property. I then saw that bitch neighbor put a PRIVATE PROPERTY sign right outside the parking area which happens to be illegal since the state is the only one allowed to put up the sign since technically they own that space. I'm tempted to rip that sign out of the ground but I don't want him to hurt anyone because I know he will. :grump:

Tl;dr: My neighbor is a horrible person and threatened my other neighbors with a hammer over community property he thinks is his... Oh just read the complaint.
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Devious Comments

:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Call the police or sue his ass for the land back.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm hoping to get my land back because if I do they'll have to tear down half of his house. :lol:
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:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Do it. Tell them that the land agreement was originally between you and someone else and since they just bought the house, the land still belong to you.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:lol:
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:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Who knows, you can charge them for using the land.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
"You pay me for half of your house!"
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:iconkitsumekat:
kitsumekat Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
And the lot!
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:iconsingagainsoon:
singagainsoon Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconlemongrabplz: that sounds awful omg. I just couldn't live there. Also, I second the sharpie suggestion.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:la:
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:iconsingagainsoon:
singagainsoon Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:iconheheplz:
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:iconsapphire-ashesx:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013
Report him.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Done it.
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:iconsapphire-ashesx:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Oh ok.
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:iconsunlark:
Sunlark Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Call the cops, it's illegal.
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:iconkinrift:
Kinrift Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
Hmm, I say you knock him out, and have his arms and legs surgically swapped. Make his life QWOP.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'll superglue his face to the ground with his ass in the air.
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:iconkinrift:
Kinrift Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
Make sure his hands are sewn to his ass, then. That'll make sure he can't break the superglue. :nod:
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:iconklaxonlithology:
KlaxonLithology Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No. Like Goatse.
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:iconarvellas:
Arvellas Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
Then sell him to a modern art museum, under the category of "alternative sculpture" or something.
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:iconkinrift:
Kinrift Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
This is even better.
I agree fully.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'll beat him with his own sign.
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:iconkinrift:
Kinrift Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
Ideal scenario. :la:
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:icontotoka:
Totoka Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Shove the sign down his throat. :stare:
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Fine :salute:
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:icontotoka:
Totoka Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Good. :mwahaha:
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:iconlobosabio:
LoboSabio Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
No, don't touch the sign. Just sit back, watch, and wait. They'll hang themselves eventually.
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:iconbkatt500:
bkatt500 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Staple the word "PUBLIC" over his sign. And then draw dicks on his house.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Let me get the sharpies!
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:iconbkatt500:
bkatt500 Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Let the dicking begin! :iconexcitedlaplz:
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:iconpokey-bunny:
Pokey-Bunny Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Get the police in on this. He's an ass.
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:iconphenova:
Phenova Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
If I were you, I would just do the liberty of taking a piece of dog shit and lighting it fire on the guy's porch in the middle of the night as I ring his doorbell (making sure that he's still up and all), silently running away before slipping into a car and driving away. Smiling, laughing, pissing myself laughing, and then return and deny everything.
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:iconklaxonlithology:
KlaxonLithology Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'd be funnier if you instead lit a can of gasoline.
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:iconfixmeknow:
FixMeKnow Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
I'm glad all our neighbors are really nice. I'm not sure what I'd do with neighbors likes yours. But I'd be up all night thinking and planning.
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:iconbenjamin-biddix:
Benjamin-Biddix Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Take the hammer and get to rippin them eyes!!!!! :iconlaspinplz:
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You people are so violent!.... And this is why I love Complaints.
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:iconvi0letdreamer:
vi0letdreamer Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Student Photographer
shoot him.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hmmm. Too painless.
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:iconklaxonlithology:
KlaxonLithology Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Shoot him in the kneecaps.
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:iconsomnusvorus:
Somnusvorus Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013   Digital Artist
I suggest getting a cam-corder ready and record the whole thing if it ever happens again. You will have more evidence if you do this. Call the cops and make them aware of the situation.

This guy seems like a real scumbag and a dangerous one too. I wouldn't be surprised if he was in prison before with his behaviour. I wish you luck! =3
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:iconprosaix:
prosaix Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
In the large? I bet you're American...
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconyoudontsayplz:
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:iconoptimusprime22:
optimusprime22 Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
I love how you both have pokemon for avatars, I tried to make an animated Torchic, it failed miserably
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:iconmorthax:
Morthax Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Tonight you will go and rip that sign right off.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I have a feeling he'd go and hurt someone though, which is the last thing I want.
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:iconmorthax:
Morthax Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Then you will call the cops if you see it.

But really if putting up such a sign is indeed illegal and a no-no, do something about it. Don't let the assholes scare the living daylight out of everyone around. :shakefist:
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:iconrandomrobskii:
RandomRobskii Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Student Filmographer
Wooooah, I'd get the police in on this one, he sounds like a knob.
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:iconpenhuin:
Penhuin Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yeah I'm going to.
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:iconendeavor-to-freefall:
Endeavor-To-Freefall Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
My neighbour puts her kid in their shed when it cries and leaves it. I'm trying to come up with rational reasons so I don't have to go through all the effort of reporting it :iconidgafplz:
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:iconlobosabio:
LoboSabio Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013
They're teaching it self reliance.
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