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January 2, 2013
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Women Suck

:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oops, typo, A Woman Sucks*.

I'll do the short story because it's funny when there's a lot of information left out and I have much better things to complain about.

A girlfriend of mine turned into a lesbian and had happy fun-time BDSM sex with the girlfriend she cheated on me with a week after we broke up. I cried for four months while she fucked and loled and spread rumors that I was bad in bed. What more can I say than OHMAHGOD! (reference to [link] )

Moving on from highschool:

My joints are fucking locking up. Arthritis + cold weather = I can't play video games or type on the computer because my knuckles keep locking up. It's kind of a pain in the ass to shove my hands on my balls in order to heat them up. They used to be the hottest part of my body- but I guess that's only true in the summer :stare:.

Kongregate doesn't update enough. Seriously, there's a new decent game out only once ever few weeks. Thankfully I'm returning to Armor Games some more so that way I can play flash games that don't make my computer lag much better.

My video card sucks. No, that's all I have to say about that. It fucking sucks. :stare:.

whiine

bitch bitch whiiiiine
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Devious Comments

:icondoctorv23:
DoctorV23 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
Yep, balls have a lower temperature than the rest of the body...(something about keeping the sperm alive I think). Hmm, not sure about the rest :lol:
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:iconmisterturtle:
MisterTurtle Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013
How the fuck do you do BDSM in fucking high school? That implies that they share equipment with someone older, most likely their parents, which is an ENTIRELY more disturbing road in of itself.

Also Fallout New Vegas keeps crashing on me. It makes me mad.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
*shiver* she probably does, but she's also a year older than me and technically out of highschool.
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:iconmisterturtle:
MisterTurtle Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013
So she chained up a high school kid? Isn't that shit illegal?
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Nah she chained up some 19 year old in an identity crisis.
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:iconmisterturtle:
MisterTurtle Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
o i c
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:iconaapis:
Aapis Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Professional Interface Designer
Pfft, liar. I can't get my woman to suck anything. :(
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
wait till she's sleeping
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:iconaapis:
Aapis Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Professional Interface Designer
Good call. :highfive:
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:iconzeflyingmuppet:
ZeFlyingMuppet Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013
What a lesbo whore :stare:...
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
She's the trashiest person I know, but eh, at least she's loyal to someone? Even if that someone wasn't me.
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:icon0s1:
0s1 Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
A woman sucks? How could you say that? She doesn't suck!

At least, she doesn't suck you. :iconteheplz:
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Don't you see? that's why she sucks!
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:icon0s1:
0s1 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013
But couldn't you also argue that she sucks because she is sucking another woman? :noes:
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No, because girls can't suckle on one another. It's hard as hell to really get that clit all the way up in there.
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:icon0s1:
0s1 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013
So she doesn't suck.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
...touche.
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:icondebra-marie:
Debra-Marie Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Man that has to be such a low blow.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It is and it isn't. On one hand my masculinity has been taken from me, on the other hand she found her true sexual identity and I respect and admire that she's no longer lying to herself.

Or maybe she's instead lying to herself already because she's experimenting in her college phases.

Either way, godammit why can't I just get a stank fuck up in here?
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:icondebra-marie:
Debra-Marie Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Be patient, grasshopper
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
NEVER

*rapes the nearest ho*
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:icondumbhoar1-plz:
dumbhoar1-plz Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
This is all Lies ..somebody that worried about how the weather effects his video game plying has never had a girlfriend .At least not one that was not attached to his own wrist...How does one turn his own appendage into a lesbo??
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Bend over and get ready for the gravy train baby, you're about to find out your sexual identity.
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:icondumbhoar1-plz:
dumbhoar1-plz Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
I can do that without you
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Obviously not, now acquiesce before I need to get :iconbohobella: to pull me off of the forums.
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:icondumbhoar1-plz:
dumbhoar1-plz Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
just go pull on that extra belly button you call a penis and you be better by the morning I promise
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
but my belly buton is an innie?
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:icondumbhoar1-plz:
dumbhoar1-plz Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013
so you have a penis and a vagina?...
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, that puts me one over everyone else!

Woo woop
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(1 Reply)
:iconrobstrand:
RobStrand Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
You should have fired back with the fallowing.

"So let me get this straight rather than simply find another boyfriend to fuck you became a lesbian because you couldn't get your rocks off through me. And you somehow thing I am the one who has issues?"
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Nah, she got her rocks off just fine. Something tells me she does it because it's different. THe lesbian thing, I mean.
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:iconrobstrand:
RobStrand Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
It's like trading in Black Ops for Battlefield. It's the same bullshit game just different features.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I like this.
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:iconwigglewaddle:
WiggleWaddle Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013
So, instead of going out and destroying more pussy after she cheated, you stayed home and cried, while she proceeded to annihilate cooch... :iconhuehuehueplz:

But, in all seriousness, that blows(no pun intended). At least she's outta your life now, I assume? Also, never had my arthritis act up during winter. :pointandlaugh:
My skin gets extremely dry, though. Three years ago, the skin on my hands actually burst open, then started to peel off. There was lots of blood, and it was nasty. My hands stayed like that for two months, until they magically healed. My legs are starting to do it, too. Not as bad as my hands, but it's getting there.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah pretty much. Talk about sucking the wide pee pee on my end.

Also, how did you un-deactivate? Are you now secretly prosaix?

And oh god, do you have ebola or something?
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:iconwigglewaddle:
WiggleWaddle Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013
I signed back in, and filled out the "reactivate?" sort-of-questionnaire(it only ask for your password). I hope I'm not prosaix, that'd be horrible.

No, my skin is just really sensitive
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh, I didn't know that's all you needed to do to reactivate. Why'd you deactivate in the first place, anyhow?

(You should totally check out this reboot I'm doing of an old idea I had, Steve & "Friends" at the office. I'll be recording the voices tomorrow, but I have the titlecard up as a teaser on dA

old start to the project: [link]

new title card: [link])
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:iconwigglewaddle:
WiggleWaddle Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
I threw a hissy fit because this site is terrible, then told everyone in Complaints that Complaints is shit. Both are true, but I guess I missed this shitty place.

Lemme know when you get some episodes done, breh.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You know you love complaints (and more specifically, how amazing I am)

yeh sure
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:iconwigglewaddle:
WiggleWaddle Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
I'm pretty sure I don't. bby u no i luv u, in cumplants or neywur, ill styl luv u
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Why are you here if you don't like it.

Besides, what's so bad about it? It's full of assholes and idiots. Laugh with the assholes at the idiots!
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(1 Reply)
:iconpaellamagi:
paellamagi Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Well I'm not really getting the impression of excellent lover from your original post.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
My penis can swivel at 150 RPM
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:iconsapphire-ashesx:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013
Cold whether is evil! My muscles are all sore.
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:iconlastzonetrooper:
LastZoneTrooper Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
i ignored that entire top bit as that is none of my business, but you are lucky on one point. my old piece of shit PC doesn't even have a video card. i am still looking for one that i can buy at a decent price so i can play my damned C&C games as well as fallout New Vegas on my fucking PC. but i still get by. if you do have a shitty vid card, go online or to the store, and go buy yourself an old copy of HALO PC and play that. the game's online servers are still up and there are more than enough players online so that you never get bored. good luck.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
...how the hell is it even possible to not have a video card?
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:iconlastzonetrooper:
LastZoneTrooper Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
original base model XP bought at an auction. before i started rebuilding it, it used to be a register computer for one of a YAMAHA dealership offices. only reason i know this is because whoever decided they needed to upgrade to newer hardware forgot to wipe the HDD. those computers didn't come with video cards since the employees weren't supposed to be on games during work hours. i wiped a file about a month ago off this damn computer that took up close to 15 gig's of space, and it looked like phone numbers and shipment orders over the last 8 years. wiped it all (no copies made, nothing as i knew nothing to do with it.) off the HDD myself as well as installed a bunch of new shit including 4 gig's of ram, a new cooling fan and a dual-layer DVD disc drive (DVD/CD Drive). unfortunately it is still missing the one part i need to run anything modern on the computer and that's the Video card, preferably with T&L capability. so far i have only found shit that i compatible with windows vista and up in terms of OS. lookin for Xp. a pc does not require a video card to run, though it is recommended as it cannot run ANYTHING medium or high res without it.
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:icontwistedteeth:
TwistedTeeth Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
And you deserve every single bit of it. :thumbsup:
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:iconbabushka-nipples:
Babushka-Nipples Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
Someone isn't letting go.
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:iconninjaslug:
Ninjaslug Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey, you deserve a stiff cock up the taint, but I don't go around spreading that now do I?
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