My recipe for the awesome Pina Colada I just made myself:
Pineapple coconut rum Cream of coconut Coconut milk (no, this is not a replacement for cream of coconut, get both. And get a good, organic brand) Ice 4 or 5 slices of pineapple (pineapple juice is lame, use the real pineapple)
Put it in a blender, make sure you have an equal amount of everything sans the pineapple coconut rum. Add pineapple coconut rum in a generous amount, an amount that is good enough to make you drunk, no two or three shot shit adding. Blend, put a big ass piece of pineapple on the motherfucking glass and enjoy.
So you fucked every living creature in the maternity ward with a big, rubber dick?
I don't know why you're sharing that here, but whatever floats your sick, demented boat I guess. I still don't know why you felt the need to start that high speed jet ski chase afterward. Not everything in life needs an action sequence, you know.