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November 17, 2012
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Hostess went out of business because THEY SOLD SHIT.

:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2012  Professional Artist
HA! I'm glad they're going under. I heard about it on Facebook- a couple days ago my news feed began to flood with complaints from all my "gravitationally challenged" friends.

Well GUESS WHAT FATTY? NO MORE TWINKIES FOR YOU! And say goodbye to all your goddamn Ho-Hos and Little Debbies as well. Your desire to cram unholy amounts of high-fructose corn syrup in the guise of something that looks sort of edible shall now go unanswered. FOR ETERNITY.

I haven't read a single actual news article about it but the know-it-all side of me is gonna say, with absolute certainty, the company surely failed because they sold tiny little gut-bombing shit bricks wrapped in plastic.

It's basically poison.

I've never eaten any of that crap in my life. Unlike the rest of you walking lard gobbets, my diet is about 80% plant matter (because I actually know how to fucking cook and make that shit taste amazing) and am not addicted to sugar. This means that a taking sip of soda feels like chugging a bottle of syrup. Which IT IS. It's fucking nasty, and all you idiots slurp that shit up like good little American consumer whores every day, rendering your tastebuds utterly shot to hell. You've made yourself immune to the amazing pleasures of eating REAL food- and then look at me like I'm crazy while I ravish a pile of garlicy satayed beet greens like ITS SEX.

Hostess, your stinking lord of processed ass syrup, HAS FALLEN! It's only a matter of time before the rest begin to die out as well, being as they represent the image of sugary rotting death and decay.

STOP BITCHING AND GO ON A FUCKING DIET.
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:iconbazzyli:
Bazzyli Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
Is this serious because it is quite a harsh opinion. Im a healthy american with a perfectly healthy weight but a twinkie every once in a while was delicious. Plus, i here Hostess owned Wonder Bread, which is one of my favorite brands and it makes me super sad.
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:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Professional Artist
It was serious a few days ago when I was in a very angry mood and just wanted to rip someone apart for no reason.

Now I'm in a melancholy mood and don't care :)
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:iconbazzyli:
Bazzyli Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
ok, just curious.
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:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Professional Artist
That said, wonderbread is terrible for you.

You might not be fat, but you're still EATING BLEACH.

Yummy.
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:icon-kron:
-kron Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012
you're funny.
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:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Professional Artist
Thank you! :)
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:iconladyleelo:
LadyLeelo Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:rofl:
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:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Professional Artist
I'm glad you found this entertaining.
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:icontokyov:
TokyoV Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012
If you think that company went out of business because their stuff was bad for you, then the know-it-all side of you doesn't know much about society North of the Equator.
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:iconwikidtron:
Wikidtron Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Professional Artist
I know LOTS of things about stuff!
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