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~CouldBeJesus:iconCouldBeJesus: May 14, 2008, 10:01:59 PM
*ding-dong*

I think to myself, "Maybe it's those little preteen sluts selling cookies again? I could use some cookies.. Or perhaps a package?"

How the scenario basically played out from there:

"Hi, we basically would like to condemn you for all of your wrong doing and assure you eternal damnation as there is only about a handful of us going to heaven. Have you yet excepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?"

"I'm sorry to break this to you, but Jesus died. A long time ago. And as far as I can remember, the last time I needed saving was when I was about 6 years old wandering in to the middle of the street."

"Well, I'm sorry to break it to you that we're a more incessant cult than you probably planned on. Take my bullshit propaganda or I'll throw it all over your porch?"

"Certainly. Do you mind fucking off if I pretend to passively scan over your pamphlet?"

"Not yet sir. I have more questioning of your faith to do."

"Hold up cunt, for just a second I'd like you to stop and think about something. You're religion tells me that only a hand full of people will be brought to heaven. Not only is there a set number of people, but these people are also all fucking saints to begin with. I use bible paper to smoke my weed if I'm out of papers, what makes you think I'd be one of these chosen few or even have a chance in hell?"

"I'm going to ignore your reasoning completely and stay persistent. Even though I've probably heard the same shit over a thousand times, it doesn't phase me. I'm just another reason for you to stay persistent with your current life style while somehow bettering myself by being brainwashed to think I'm closer to God than anyone else."

"... If you don't leave, I will rape you."

That's pretty much what it takes to get these people to fuck off. Fucking hate Jehovah's witnesses. I never like to diss someone else's personal beliefs (well, to an extent), but fuck anyone who rides their religion like it's some high horse that can trample over any sort of logical reasoning.

--
What you don't understand, you can make mean anything.

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`schemata-69:iconschemata-69: May 14, 2008, 10:04:00 PM
:lmao:

--
"You don't need a bigger tent, Mr. Steele, you need a smaller clown car."
~mastersmith:iconmastersmith: May 14, 2008, 10:07:00 PM
I read one of their pamphlets once. A major portion of it focused on how masturbating is evil if I remember correctly.

--
That which a man thinks he becomes.
~5-7x28mm:icon5-7x28mm: May 14, 2008, 10:08:48 PM
I end up closing the door before I'm finished opening it. I don't have the energy to deal with those people anymore. :(

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"Those who would give up liberty for security deserve neither."
~FightTheManMan:iconFightTheManMan: May 14, 2008, 10:10:18 PM
I don't get Jehovah's Witnesses. :)

--
It's raining. [link]
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And I made a Naruto AMV! [link]

Proud co-owner of the S&M farm!
~the-happy-clown:iconthe-happy-clown: May 14, 2008, 10:10:52 PM
My girlfriend's mother is a Jehova's Witness. One day I want to ring her doorbell and say "Have you questioned Jesus today?"

--
Fat bottomed girls, you make the rockin' world go round.

Lean On Me and Coach Carter are the same movie.
=blackladybinary:iconblackladybinary: May 14, 2008, 10:14:09 PM
We never get them at my door. :o I feel lucky.

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永遠の隙間で 足を止めて 翼 癒すつもりもなくて
~InnocencexLost:iconInnocencexLost: May 14, 2008, 10:15:41 PM
I just always close the door in their faces. :shrug:
~CouldBeJesus:iconCouldBeJesus: May 14, 2008, 10:18:12 PM
lol

--
What you don't understand, you can make mean anything.
~Juliabohemian:iconJuliabohemian: May 14, 2008, 10:18:25 PM
Wow, they're even harder to insult than psycho-therapists. I love those guys. You can say ANYTHING to them and they'll just attribute it to mental illness.

--
Death is pretty final, but I'm collecting vinyl.
I'M GONNA D.J. AT THE END OF THE WORLD!
~CouldBeJesus:iconCouldBeJesus: May 14, 2008, 10:19:15 PM
Without letting them know personally know that they're shit? I couldn't refuse such an opportunity.

--
What you don't understand, you can make mean anything.

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