Anyone want a good read.

Forums > Art Related > Literature

~WolfWarrior77 Nov 18, 2012

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Is a story where everyone on planet earth are monsters or aliens from shows,card games,video games, etc.

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^Beccalicious Nov 20, 2012 Professional Writer

Please read the forum stickies before posting. If you would like critique on this piece, please use the critique thread. If you want to share your work, please use the thumbshare forum or try a +Groups.

*schris91 Nov 20, 2012 Student Filmographer

Good lord it's called a paragraph, sir. New idea= new paragraph. New dialogue= new paragraph. Also indent. Then try asking people to read it.

~WolfWarrior77 Nov 18, 2012

Apologies then I now feel dumb for posting it here....

~Lovely-Words Nov 18, 2012 Hobbyist General Artist

Learn to format your posts for this site. There's no way I'm reading a text brick like that.

~carusmm Nov 18, 2012 Student Writer

Too much dialogue.

~saartha Nov 18, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

~WolfWarrior77 Nov 18, 2012

Is that good or bad?

=merrak Nov 18, 2012 Hobbyist

You want the thumbshare forum, or the critique thread at the top of this forum (if you want critique). This thread will probably be locked.

That aside, I think you'll receive more responses if you format your text so it is easier to read. Right now you have two big paragraphs. The text blurs together. I gave up after line two because my eyes kept getting lost in the words.

Fortunately, that's easy to fix. At the very least, break to a new paragraph at the end of each speaker's dialogue line. That alone would break up the wall-of-text into easily readable lines.

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