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November 18, 2012
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The Butts-and-Holly Poetry Contest

:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
This forum needs more excitement; as such I'm going to give shit away.

In a post below: Show me three of your best on-site poems and I'll assign you a random animal based on your talent level, but not an obvious one, so you will be left to wonder whether it is a compliment or an insult; this will be a point for further discussion. I'll also (less randomly and based on who got the most adorable animal, external judge will be used here) buy at least one of you a three-month subscription to the site. Deadline's Friday unless I get a clear winner before then. Bonus points for poems being hipsterlicious and legible--I've been reading submissions elsewhere that have invented adverbs like "godzilla-ly" so if your poems have that, well, your spirit animal's a tardigrade and don't bother.

In true hipster-lit-review fashion, feel free to also show up to one piece of gonzo journalism, film photography, or performance art involving communion wafers and lube.
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Devious Comments

:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:lock: OP request
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Professional
MARGAY WAN. THE END.
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:iconrovanna:
Rovanna Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012   Digital Artist
Thanks for the membership! :tighthug:

(Apologies to the people who wrote real poems :P)
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:iconrovanna:
Rovanna Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012   Digital Artist
:wow: That's me! :iconkermityayplz:
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:iconrovanna:
Rovanna Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012   Digital Artist
I didn't have any pomes, so I wrote one just for you. :iconbiggrinplz: It's ever so intellectual.

In a laneway bar where I first saw you,
Over my Ray Bans, how I adore you.
You look a little like Bon Iver,
But with worse clothes and better hair.

I'd like to follow you on Tumblr,
But I get shy and simply mumble a
Quick 'hello' then retreat,
Fake grass beneath my slippered feet.

As I ponder the space between you 'n me,
I am overcome with ennui.
I wish I was bold as my reindeer cardigan,
Then we'd never be apart again.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Professional
Oh good god this. Author is a margay. An absolute margay.
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:iconrovanna:
Rovanna Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012   Digital Artist
Cheers. I had to look it up, they're adorable! Why have I never heard of these animals before?? :stare:
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Professional
Because ocelots get all the spotlight, sadly.
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:iconmadoldhag:
MadOldHag Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Why not? I am curious what animal I am. Oh, and don't mind the preview pictures

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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Professional
Totally a shoebill.

I'm like the freakin' forum sorting hat.
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:iconmadoldhag:
MadOldHag Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, I belong to an endangered species. :lol:
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:iconcarusmm:
carusmm Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
in the theatre of dag,
the mainstream,
a river of gold.

star trekking across the universe,
boldly going queer
from what I hear.

like eating fish tits,
quite a hit are
little bits.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
Obviously a pika.

"like eating fish tits" is one of the best lines I've ever read. It's like someone put Song Zhiwen through google translate, badly.
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:iconmr-timeshadow:
Mr-Timeshadow Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Tribute to Three WorldsMC Escher's Three Worlds

Reflecting, child of Netherlands,

upon the pond, and in his hands

   he carries lithographic tools.

   Pondering ponds, rivers and pools,

he captures them. He understands

the fluid flowing over sands

or silt or peat. The view commands

   he enter nature's vestibules,

 reflecting

On nearby forest's noble stands.

a curious catfish demands

   obeisance to the pond-life's rules.

   Ripples dissolve trees. Catfish schools

artist, its eyes, like pond with lands,

reflecting.

Sphere InversionSphere Inversion

A perfect sphere sits,
  silently symmetrical,
  unsullied and serene.

Sudenly, longitudes bulge
  and ripple radially.

The poles approach each other,
  but embraces are replaced
   with vaporous passage, each
    through the other, to stop
     opposite the start.

Then, protruding longitudes
  begin their spin, turning
   like keys in a lock.

But unlike a lock,
  the turning keys reveal nothing.

Indeed, the sphere seems
  tangled tighter than before,
   a snare ensnaring a snare.

Yet, the poles approach
  and pass again, one through one,
   returning to their homes
    clearly altered by

Sun BlindSun-Blind

Thunder's gone, the lightning too,
 And sun has washed the clouds away
Rainbow shimmers into view,
 And look who's come to play!

See fine fur that glistens white?
 Behold majestic horn!
Silent as a moonless night,
 A splendid unicorn!

Feeling free and frolicsome
 It bows and starts to prance.
A kitten and a puppy come
 To join its joyous dance.

Soon a muskrat, fox and lamb,
 A bunny and a squirrel
Are each as happy as a clam,
 Having joined the whirl.

As the animals commune,
 A merry song fills their bazaar.
See the elves that play this tune,
 One on a flute, one on guitar?

With all of this harmonium
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:iconcarusmm:
carusmm Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
not another fucking unicorn.
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:iconmr-timeshadow:
Mr-Timeshadow Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Did you read the whole thing? It's your kind of poem!
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
A graceful dhole.

Dholes are way underrated but also confused for... well, about every other type of dog. Also: fluffy.
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:iconmr-timeshadow:
Mr-Timeshadow Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012
Well, I do look fluffy to the naked eye. So put some clothes on that thing or you'll see fluff!
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:iconanimperfectdream:
AnImperfectDream Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This actually sounds kind of fun...

So before the inevitable lock, here, have some of my poetry that I don't really put any thought and effort into. Both of those things are far too mainstream so I like, don't bother, plus their old stuff was better. I tried too hard to sound hipster-ish before it was cool.

As Echoes Drift OnwardsAs Echoes Drift Onwards
------

The echo drifts onward,
Of tales unforgotten,
Or perhaps memories,
Discarded as blindly as faith,
For who could have seen,
That the man beneath the mask,
Could be so cold,
And callous to cast,
Away his cherished dreams,

Where do we wander,
Under the midnight moon,
When all roads lead to dust,
And where do we soar,
When all our skies are crowded,
With other lights burning far brighter than our own,

Do we seek to ever float so high
Or are we simply clutching
at the threads of fate
Hoping that just once
We are not the ones who cut the lines,

For the roads of destiny are a tightro

An Imperfect DreamAn Imperfect Dream
------

Is there such a thing as an imperfect dream?
I believe there is,
It's that state of being, when caught on the seam,
Not truly awake, but not asleep either,
And just as waking is life,
So too is sleep death,

Who are we that walk along that parapet?
Trapped in this state of insignificance,
That wander eternity with our heads in the clouds,
But our feet placed firmly on the ground,
Entrenched in reality but gazing at a place far beyond,
Between the wires and the barbs, to the place we cannot touch,

Our no-man's land,
Where none may stand,

For life is a battlefield,
And some are caught in a war,

Watch the world burnA blackened street with scarlet paves,
A creature lurks within the aves,
Crouching, growling, crying in pain,
This beast lying down, it's battle in vain,

This entity faceless an enigma unknown,
This shadow, this raven, this cowl and this crow,
It no longer spreads it's black-feathered wings,
To soar to the sky above al other things,

This demon, this devil, this damned darkened soul,
In the world it once conquered time has taken it's toll,
It once wandered, weary, wisened and wonderous,
A force volatile, violent, vehement and vicious,

That  ancient force omnipotent, omnicient and ominous,
That once held dominion over all of
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:iconcarusmm:
carusmm Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
to sleep perchance to dream not at all.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
Pff, have faith, this won't get locked.

Your poetry makes me think of a sun bear. One that does its job well on a street.
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:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I have like one poem posted, so I just wrote three for you instead.

mark
without glasses,
still a hipster

eyes
like
ugh, you wouldn't get it

[submission violates ToS]
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:iconwreckling:
wreckling Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012   Writer
:lmao:
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
Priya, marry me.

CLEARLY YOU ARE AN OCELOT. AS YOU ARE AWESOME.
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:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
WE ARE GETTING MARRIED IN THE FIELDS OF AFRICA.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Professional
OH MAN TOTO CAN SING OUR FIRST DANCE.
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:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
CAN BRITNEY BACK HIM UP.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Professional
my joke went about ten feet over your head, didn't it.
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:iconneurotype:
neurotype Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
...yes it did. I'm not that old, OKAY.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Professional
WHOOOOOSH
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:iconcarusmm:
carusmm Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You have promise.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
Clearly your poetry defines you as a monitor lizard. Probably a lace monitor though.
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:iconcrystelclear1104:
crystelclear1104 Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I Prayed For RainDear God,

I prayed for rain yesterday.
Rain to rinse the sprawling greens that lay across my home,
To wash the coats of the goats that graze there, so peacefully,
To clean the mildew from that rotting hut where the old man lives.
To cleanse my lips, for they are dirty with half-hearted lies.

I prayed for a warm, soft rain.
For a cold rain would make the grasses shiver and shrivel, and
the goats to mewl uncomfortably as they retreated into the darkness.
The old man would simply turn and hide in his aging hut of cold, cold stones.
And my lips? They would harden with the lies I coat them with.

I want a shower to dance in.
So the gras

Shh. (Extension II)Shh, to hear the silent scream
of the girl you used to be.

Don't blink; she'll flash before your eyes.
To let her escape would not be wise.

She's a monster, built of tears and pain.
She'll rip at your soul till no joy remains.

She's out of control, a tangled mess,
Screaming for sorrow, for pain, distress.

It's imperative to keep her locked in cage,
Sealed with your agony, your accumulated rage.

Remember: she'll hurt them, too,
the ones who mean so much to you.

For however you choose to lock her away,
She will demand of you what you cannot pay.

Smile Today, Darling!This mirror does not show me.

All I see is a girl, pale as the moonlight,
The ghost of a heart once pure white.

But when I lift my hand, she lifts hers too.
Who is this girl? She's blurred into ash hues.

There's something, though, that screams out loud:
A sparkle in her eye proclaims, "I AM PROUD."

A twitch at her lips, a fourth of a smile
Surfaces from a decade's exile.

A burst of a rainbow, a ray of sunshine,
'I'M GOING TO LIVE," is today's headline.

So now, I finally see me.


:w00t:
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:iconcarusmm:
carusmm Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Christ, women should give up poetry and take up sewing.
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Professional
:iconfblikeplz:
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:icontiganusi:
tiganusi Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2012  Professional
I'm seeing magpies for some reason.

Plath-tastic. Crows, but a little more grabby.
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