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December 10, 2012
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PLZ Take a look at my 20 page COMIC! Opinion is needed!!

:icon4fumiaki4:
4Fumiaki4 Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hello there my dear artists^^ i wanted to ask you for your opinion what you think of my comic which is a motivational comedy comic i did and just yeah wanted to know if it is enjoyable and maybe even some suggestions what you would rather see as in art style or page look. THANK YOU ALL^^

HERE IS THE COMIC LINK ---> [link]
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:iconegypturnash:
egypturnash Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
So um you say you love to create worlds and stories in this comic. Why are you drawing yourself standing around whining that you suck instead? Where's the world you're in? Where's the story?

You also bitch that you can't draw non-human things, so you don't. Guess what? The way to fix that is to spend some time drawing non-human things from life, so you have an idea of what to do.

I see you practicing settings in other pieces in your gallery and doing some pretty nice work. Put some of that into your comics.

Comics-particular notes:

- Writing text in Comic Sans ain't gonna cut it. Especially when you fill in the area around them with grey and don't even bother filling in the spaces inside. Find a better font. Or just write it out by hand. (Given the material of your comic, I'm sure you will respond that your handwriting sucks, too. PRACTICE AND MAKE IT SUCK LESS.)

Also your text is super-huge, seriously what is going on here.

- You could put a lot more on the page at the size you're drawing it at. The most panels you have on a page is three. Most of your pages only have one drawing. Even if things were happening in the "story", there wouldn't be much of anything happening on most pages. Go look at some comics you like and think about how much is on each page in terms of drawings, text, and story. (It's possible that you're modeling your pages after manga, some of which does tend towards 3-4 panels per page on average, which might explain the huge text as well - but if you are, then export your images at an appropriate scale for that.)

- All of your panels bleed out to the edges of the page. I really don't have the sense that you're thinking about panels, just that you're slapping some drawings down onto the page and putting lines between them. Normally people will put most of their drawings inside panels, with gutters between them, saving bleeding out to the edge of the page for special moments. You don't have to do what everyone else does, but the fact that every single drawing is full bleed leads me to think you're not actually thinking about this at all.

Find yourself a copy of "Understanding Comics" by Scott McCloud. Read it. Think about it. Use what it teaches you to analyze some comics you like. It will make you a LOT more ambitious.
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:icon4fumiaki4:
4Fumiaki4 Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Well i love to create, it doesnt matter what it is. Creating a game for me is no problem, i worked on a card game for 1 year and made over 100 different play cards for that trading card game. And the game works perfectly and is damn balanced. Well i havent done any world stuff there because the comic is supposed to be in a empty world where everything is white. Because its like the title says, the world of an artist. You start with a white empty page and with time you create different things on it. THese two would just imagine stuff there and it would appear. I know , this comic is quite a fail. But still, you guys thought me so much about what i am doing wrong so i know what i shouldnt do anymore. I am thankful for your time, sorry if it was so annoying for you reading it. Thank you again and i will try to listen to you guys before doing another comic.
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:iconbrownez-koekoez:
Brownez-Koekoez Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I enjoyed read your comic :nod: Try Scott McCloud's ways.
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:iconcrimsonmagpie:
CrimsonMagpie Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
People here have spoken wisdom, and I agree with most of what they've said. :nod:

One of the most common errors I see in amateur comics is sloppy typing and poor font choice. As ~Black-Allison said, you're using one of the worst possible fonts for a comic; the ironically titled Comic Sans. There are a lot of good comic fonts out there you can buy or download free. The one you see in almost all professional comics is called Whizbang [link].

You also need to pay a lot more attention to your grammar; nothing says 'unprofessional' like sloppy lettering. There are certain grammatical rules which, if broken, make any piece of writing look bad. Always capitalise letters at the start of a sentence, and for the word 'I'. Don't use too many exclamation-marks of question-marks, one is usually enough. Try to keep the letters the same size throughout the comic; varying their size is visually confusing and looks bad. If you want to add emphasis embolden and italicise your words.

There are a lot of large speech bubbles in your comic, which is hard on the eye; the reader will be more likely to skip it than read it. Chop any large areas into multiple bubbles. Any text-driven comic needs to have interesting compositions and effects to keep the visual interest; many comic scenes involving long conversations/monologues vary and size of the character being depicted, as well as their facial expression.

Your art seems pretty decent, but for a comic I'd advise working on a more dynamic style, as well as a formula that allows you to draw quickly. Your current comic art looks like digital 'pencils' waiting to be inked. Remember; contrast is visually interesting, and the eye will automatically be drawn toward areas of greatest contrast. Your comic is mainly grey tones, and therefore doesn't grab the eye too well. Also try jazzing up your lines by making them a little more angular; curves are not very dynamic, and the eye follows them smoothly, so many artists (myself included) make everything a little more angular than it should be.

Overall I'd say your comic work has a lot of potential, but you have to start observing some fundamental principles more to make it really work. :meow: Also, you might find this site interesting/inspirational, it's full of original comic art, so you can see how it's drawn better than by looking at 'finished' comics [link]
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:icon4fumiaki4:
4Fumiaki4 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Well thank you very much for your words and advices. Thank you very much for your time and again thanks for such a large nice text^^ i really appreciate your opinion and your time for looking at it.^^ THANKS
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:iconcrimsonmagpie:
CrimsonMagpie Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
No problem, good luck with the long journey of mastering art! :meow:
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:iconrizhnir:
Rizhnir Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012
Read it. I think it has potential, but I think if you want to get a message across, you need to integrate it into an actual story, rather than lecturing your audience about motivation. Also, proper grammar will give your text a more "professional" look to it. Finally, like someone else already said, put your dude in a world! You did it a few times -- it looks like he's in a living room, so why not add some furniture so it's not all blank space?

That said, you got a good understanding of anatomy and perspective, and I did chuckle at the "goal" page. Listen to everyone's feedback here -- it will help you improve immensely. Keep going and practicing!
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:icon4fumiaki4:
4Fumiaki4 Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Well i put him on purpose into an empty white world. Thats basically the thing about the story, these two guys would just imagine stuff for this empty world they are inside. So basically the place where they are can change from one second to another depending on what these two are coming up with.
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:iconzingam:
Zingam Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
:D Show the people how much you rule! ;)
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:iconzingam:
Zingam Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Boring, nobody cares about how much you suck! Draw something that actually catches me and only then I might get interested in who you are ;)
:D See, I did my first comics in like 4th grade and it had a story. Probably the most stupid story ever but it was a story. In 6th grade I had a 50-60 pages with shooting, killing, explosions, aliens, mutants, commandos :D
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